Gameweek 17 results

1  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
67 1087
2  up Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
68 1063
3  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
54 1049
3  down But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
47 1049
5  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
66 1013
6  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
63 1006
7  down Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
53 999
8  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
71 994
9  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
54 993
10  down Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
47 980
11  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
48 974
12  up King raggg
Steven Darling
55 969
13  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
39 964
14  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
60 964
15  up FTM
Stu Smith
60 960
16  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
46 949
17  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
56 944
18  up INIT FC
Mustafa khan
58 936
19  down RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
44 919
20  same Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
44 916
21  up Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
56 913
22  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
44 906
23  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
37 904
24  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
54 900
25  same Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
45 899
26  up Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
61 891
27  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
34 889
28  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
42 887
29  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
74 881
30  up Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
48 878
31  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
46 873
32  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
59 872
33  down The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
43 871
34  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
48 868
35  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
46 868
36  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
47 864
37  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
58 864
38  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
70 862
39  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
41 860
40  up ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
64 852
41  up El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
52 837
42  down Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
44 831
43  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
42 830
44  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
33 824
45  same Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
54 822
46  same Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
63 807
47  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
52 793
48  down It’s coming home
scott mcgow
48 788
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
51 758
50  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
36 733
51  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
35 712

 

Manager of the week – Salah Buffoon!!! – Jitesh Lakhani – 74 points

A second manager of the week award for Salah Buffoon!!! Their last, in GW8, helped them jump into the top 40 and came largely as a result of sticking the armband on Eden Hazard and reaping the rewards of a double figure haul. Ditto this week. Hazard’s first 10+ total in nine weeks has helped the Buffoons rise into the top 30. Hazard scored a goal and a noteworthy fifth assist in four games to help Chelsea to victory over Brighton. Chelsea’s good festive fixture run might enable Hazard to produce more of the same – although it does appear that he’s ended the week with a yellow flag next to his name.

Player of the week – Henrikh Mkhitaryan – Arsenal – 14 points

Bargain of the week – Danny Ings – Southampton – 13 points

Southampton’s impressive win over Arsenal provides both the player awards this week. Does this prove it’s better to pump more money into your midfield than it does into your attack? Danny Ings’ brace and top bonus comes in at 11 points to Mkhitaryan’s 12 (2 goals plus 2 bonus points), and so he somewhat unluckily, given the match result, has to settle for the bargain award.

The Arsenal side that looked so impressive in the North London derby haven’t fulfilled that fantasy point-scoring promise, particularly Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, who many managers instantly transferred in as a result of his performance against Spurs. Mkhitaryan gave way at half time in that game and has only played 45 minutes in each of the games since, so it would have been hard to predict his involvement here, never mind the likelihood of him netting twice.

Attention may switch to Danny Ings again as it did in the early weeks of the season. The Southampton striker needs to stay fit having just come back from a six week lay off. He and Salomon Rondon appear to be the only viable sub £6 million striking options on the table at the moment.

Twat of the week – Laurent Koscielny – Arsenal – 0 points

And to complete the set. It’s not the return to first team action that Koscielny would have wanted, but worth noting that he lasted the full 90 minutes and starts at a reasonably priced £5.4million. You’d expect him to be a regular, maybe once the busy festive schedule is out the way, so definitely worth keeping an eye on. Arsenal need to improve defensively and maybe Koscielny will help them do that.

Goal of the week – Gerard Deulofeu. A game full of good goals…

…and no vid to prove it.

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Gameweek 10 results and October Manager of the Month

1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
61 682
2  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
68 666
3  up Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
86 635
4  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
91 626
5  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
51 613
6  up Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
75 608
7  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
71 602
8  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
77 599
9  down Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
64 599
10  up Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
69 598
11  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
87 595
12  down SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
45 590
13  up Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
66 578
14  down RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
51 575
15  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
58 571
16  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
85 570
17  down King raggg
Steven Darling
43 566
18  same Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
62 558
19  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
60 556
20  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
69 553
21  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
71 552
22  up FTM
Stu Smith
70 551
23  up CAS Vampire Slayers
Mustafa khan
72 549
24  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
78 547
25  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
78 546
26  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
74 543
27  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
44 535
27  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
44 535
29  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
84 530
30  up Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
71 527
31  up Morningblues
Jeff Morning
72 523
32  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
68 523
33  same Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
65 522
34  down Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
54 520
35  up El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
70 517
36  down The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
24 516
37  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
66 512
38  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
45 510
39  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
55 506
40  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
46 501
41  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
52 497
42  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
47 486
43  up ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
40 479
44  up Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
46 475
45  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
52 466
45  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
48 466
47  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
47 460
48  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
49 459
49  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
40 454
50  up Ross’s champions
darren frankland
51 435
51  up The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
43 428

 

October Manager of the Month – Game of Stones – Ryan Garoghan – 198 points

It was Salah Buffoon!!!’s to lose – and they did. They had a 10 point lead over their nearest challenger after last week and a 22 point lead over Game of Stones. The 34 point swing meant that even if the Buffoons actually had Salah in their team, and as captain, they still wouldn’t have held onto top spot. Game of Stones have been no lower than 8th since the beginning of the season and their victory means that each of the manager of the month prizes so far have gone to our current top three in the league.

1  up Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
86 198
2  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
78 195
3  up Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
75 190
4  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
87 186
5  down Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
52 186
6  down But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
61 185

 

Manager of the week – Neil Madrid – Neil Strong – 91 points

Banking on Liverpool scoring a bagful against Cardiff and Bournemouth doing likewise against Fulham guaranteed Neil Madrid their week winning score. Sadio Mane contributed 30 points as captain and a combination of Ryan Fraser and Callum Wilson, who is now the game’s highest scoring striker, added 24 points between them. Madrid move up into fourth, and along with Game of Stones, have managed to claw back a little on the two runaway leaders.

Player of the week – Ross Barkley – Chelsea – 17 points

From out of nowhere and getting back to the player he looked like he could be in his earlier days at Everton. This is Barkley’s second double figure score in three, his third consecutive scoring gameweek, and is offering ridiculous value in this form at £5.8 million. You just know the minute you bring him in he’ll be rotated.

Bargain of the week – Callum Wilson – Bournemouth – 13 points

It’s his second appearance on the roll of honour in the last three weeks as Bournemouth’s impressive free scoring start to the season continues. Wilson’s totals are being helped by Josh King’s absence. He’s the single focal point of the attack and is on (and scoring) penalties. Another current must-have in great form and becoming almost fixture proof with Bournemouth’s reliability at finding the back of the net.

Twat of the week – Mark Noble – West Ham United – -2 points

Can be a reliable asset when you’re lucky enough to have him in and West Ham get a penalty. He’s always cheap enough to occupy a bench spot with a guaranteed start. On the other hand he’s also one of those players almost guaranteed to land himself in the twat book at least once a season.

Goal of the week – Granit Xhaka. The latest in a run of long-range-top-corner blinders.

 

Gameweek 8 results

1  up But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
71 568
2  down Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
60 557
3  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
51 510
4  up Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
70 507
5  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
61 507
6  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
68 507
7  down King raggg
Steven Darling
55 507
8  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
60 505
9  up Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
76 494
10  up Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
71 491
11  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
62 491
12  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
56 483
13  down The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
49 480
14  down Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
47 466
15  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
55 464
16  up RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
58 459
17  down Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
50 457
18  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
58 454
19  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
56 453
20  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
50 453
21  down The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
35 448
22  up Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
58 445
23  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
32 441
23  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
62 441
25  up FTM
Stu Smith
64 435
26  up CAS Vampire Slayers
Mustafa khan
49 435
26  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
47 435
28  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
68 425
28  up Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
50 425
30  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
52 423
31  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
32 423
32  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
66 418
33  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
38 417
34  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
28 414
35  down Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
40 414
36  up Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
65 414
37  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
67 409
38  same ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
53 408
39  up Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
53 408
40  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
44 405
41  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
90 401
42  up El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
56 400
43  down Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
51 398
44  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
31 397
45  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
57 389
46  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
50 387
47  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
29 384
48  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
54 376
49  up The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
60 372
50  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
46 365
51  same Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
50 358
52  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
54 343

 

Manager of the week – Jitesh Lakhani – Salah Buffoon!!! – 90 points

We’re banging the high scores in week after week. Another 90+ score to win the weekly accolade. Bigger scores were achieved, as in Salah Buffoon!!!’s case, with the right captain choice of the two most popular this week. Harry Kane trolled the majority by not only not scoring, or even getting close, but by also picking up a yellow. Eden Hazard did what it appears he might do every week and put in a man of the match performance adding 14 more points to his total. Hazard is this season’s Salah. He’s never been more essential, posting returns in every gameweek bar one, adding £0.8 million to his value already. Elsewhere the Buffoons scored with three Wolves players, which is becoming template, Callum Wilson, the unlikely king of the assists and Alexandre Lacazette, who is quietly totting the goals up for an Arsenal team that no-one dare mention as title contenders.

Player of the week – Matt Doherty – Wolverhampton Wanderers – 15 points

As essential as Hazard in many ways, for his price and now his scoring rate. Only Hazard can better Doherty’s three double figure returns. This is is highest score to date, and takes him to third in the defender ranks. It’s a good season for attacking wing backs and it means you don’t necessarily need all three of Mendy, Robertson and Alonso.

Bargain of the week – Callum Wilson – Bournemouth – 14 points

Three goals ain’t bad but seven assists is bloody marvelous. Bournemouth are free scoring, hitting four for the second time this season. He and strike partner Josh King scored 27 points between them this week and have 91 points between them overall. A double pronged Bournemouth attack looks like a good proposition.

Twat of the week – Christian Kabasele – Watford – -4 points

You’ve got to go some to get a minus four. Well done son. Watford were twat team of the season last time out and this makes up for their totally twat free start to the season.

Goal of the week – Gylfi Sigurdsson. 49s in.