Gameweek 16 results

How much longer before we’re completely rid of our Manchester City players? Raheem Sterling has exited close to a million teams in the last month and with that seen an almost half million pounds price drop. There comes a time when patience just becomes sheer stubbornness and stupidity. Let it go, let it go. And as for Kevin De Bruyne, the one asset we all thought we’d stick by… Just because he was dirt cheap in the first place, shouldn’t mean he’s not replacable when the points dry up. He doesn’t look quite so cheap now when you compare his current form to that of Son and Alli, or even Jonjo bloody Shelvey. It is Arsenal this weekend though?!

It was a good week for Locky’s at the top, re-establishing a lead with the highest score in the top ten. It looks like the Spurs bandwagon has been well and truly jumped upon by a number of teams, most notably our leaders and Atletico Chappers, who leap up into third – possibly their highest placing ever. Chappers opted away from Vardy as captain and chose Harry Kane, who posted only his second double digit score of the season – the first being in GW1. Smooth.

1
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
79 1007
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
67 963
3
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
72 945
4
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
46 944
5
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
68 938
6
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
52 935
7
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
54 927
8
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
75 922
9
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
66 920
10
Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
66 910

Our monster score of the week, however, came from Kebab Eaters, who despite being down in 33rd place are on a bit of a roll. They’ve climbed 3.5 million places in the last seven weeks, managing consecutive green arrows. This 94 point haul was in among the top 20k worldwide and was miraculously made up of a five man defence in a week in which only four teams kept clean sheets. Standard captain plus a nice smattering of Spurs players, which I imagine may increase over the coming weeks, also saw them race into early contention for the December monthly prize.

Manager of the week – Kebab Eaters United – Paul Howard – 94 points

Player of the week – Harry Kane – Tottenham Hotspur – 16 points

Bargain of the week – George Baldock – Sheffield United – 14 points

Twat of the week – Matt Targett – Aston Villa – -1 points

Goal of the week – Heung-Min Son. 

Gameweek 11 results

We have a leader. A proper leader. There’ll be no more weekly chopping and changing at the top for a while given Locky Bauer Bowyer’s current rate of scoring. This week they surpassed the 100 point barrier – the first team to do that so far this season. Their total of 103 becomes the highest weekly score, eclipsing Cook Pass Babtridge’s week one total of 99. It was inside the top 6,000 in the world – one of the top 0.1% in the entire game. And as a result, they now sit in the top 2,000 overall.

1
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
103 692
2
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
78 664
3
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
79 645
4
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
81 644
5
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
74 642
6
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
56 634
7
Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
73 633
8
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
68 632
9
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
70 629
10
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
56 613

No-one really got close to them but that’s not to say everyone had a bad week. Most of us have John Lundstram after all. The next nearest score was 83, one of a hefty group of managers posting 70+ totals, most of whom, if not all, would have received green arrows.

Every one of Locky’s starting XI contributed, apart from KDB, who was the game’s second top scorer at the start of the weekend. Manchester City were arguably the main reason the rest of us didn’t challenge that high score. The Sterling or De Bruyne captain choice looked too good to ignore against Southampton. We should maybe have expected Saints to park the bus. When the defence was finally breached it was by Aguero, who has been exiting a lot of teams recently (although not Locky Bauer Bowyer’s), and Kyle Walker. A Sterling and KDB double up would have gained you no more that 5 points.

Manager of the week – Paul Hawkins – Locky Bauer Bowyer – 103 points

Player of the week – John Lundstram – Sheffield United – 21 points

Bargain of the week – Lys Mousset – Sheffield United – 13 points

Twat of the week – James Tarkowsi – Burnley – 0 points

Goal of the week – Jamie Vardy. 2m14s

Gameweek 9 results

A year ago the leaders of the Buckets league had 621 points. They were 100 points ahead of 14th place. Already, three quarters of the league were out of the title race. Our best managers had cracked the season’s code early and were moving at pace. We had a good mix of elite players staying in form (Hazard, Salah, Robertson) and differential cheap picks to fit the budget (Wan Bissaka, Wolves assets). Fast forward a year. This week sees our leader limp to 525 points. You have to drop to 51st place to go back 100 points. Lower-mid table languishers need not worry just yet. You still might win.

1
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
49 525
2
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
54 516
3
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
35 513
4
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
40 511
5
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
52 507
6
Chef Utd
Robert Frost
48 502
7
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
37 496
8
Greeenteeaaam
adam greenwood
43 494
9
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
35 494
10
Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
45 493

Captain choices are so hard. There’s almost too much choice some weeks. Most captained this week was Sergio Aguero…closely followed by Tammy Abraham and Callum Wilson. Aguero’s benching wouldn’t necessarily of promoted anyone decent from vice captain either. Abraham and Wilson blanked. Only Sterling of the £10 million+ players picked up any attacking points – and then he got carded. You needed to have had the heavily rotated David Silva lined up to take the armband.

Just like league leaders, Sterling Silva, who would have been sweating on an Aguero one minute cameo more than anyone. Silva’s eventual 22 points saw them rise to the top of the table ahead of Musttryharder, who climbed to second with a 54 point haul, one of only five scores over 50. The highest score, a 56 by Pretty Schitty City, was aided by a handy 13 point haul from Jack Grealish. That’s four attacking contributions in three weeks for the Villa captain. Another mid-price one to watch.

Extra jammy points to those who may have profited from everyone’s favourite first sub, John Lundstram, coming off their bench to replace Aguero or Salah. And probably not for the first time this season. And that’s kind of what FPL has come to. Crossing fingers for a Sheffield United clean sheet (because that’s evidently more likely than Aubameyang scoring), to score 6 points from a guy whose starting price was £4 million – because your £11 million strikers are benched, or just bollocks.

Manager of the week – Pretty Schitty City – Alex Michaluk – 56 points

Player of the week – Marcos Alonso – Chelsea – 14 points

Bargain of the week – Jack Grealish – Aston Villa – 13 points

Twat of the week – Aaron Mooy – Brighton and Hove Albion – -2 points

Goal of the week – David Silva. 33s in

 

 

Gameweek 8 results

Anybody get a captain choice right? None of this lot did…

1
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
51 478
2
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
41 476
3
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
48 471
4
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
37 462
5
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
46 461
6
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
28 459
6
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
41 459
8
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
37 455
9
Chef Utd
Robert Frost
39 454
10
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
47 452

…yet it didn’t really matter. I’ve not checked all 61 of us, but it may be that only King Ragg, our highest scorer, who picked Sadio Mane, achieved double figures with their armband. Raheem Sterling was the most popular choice – and why wouldn’t he be? Rested in midweek and up against a slow starting Wolves team just off the plane from Europa duty – and at the Etihad. That went well. More blanks for Salah, Kane and Aguero, a rare blank for Aubameyang and for those of us daring enough to opt for Teemu Pukki – well that party is probably over. So all in all, a good week to have a bad week. If you clambered over 50, you did well.

Manager of the week – Steven Darling – King Ragg – 62 points

Player of the week – Adama Traore – Wolverhampton Wanderers – 16 points

Bargain of the week – Wesley Moraes – Aston Villa – 14 points

Twat of the week – Seamus Coleman – Everton – -2 points

Goal of the week – Douglas Luiz. 8m50s in. 

 

Gameweek 6 results

The weekend scoring was dominated by the 8-0 thumping of Watford by Manchester City. Bernardo Silva, KDB and either Otamendi or Mahrez would have been the best three way combo to have, but you could also throw David Silva and Aguero in there and still come out with a decent looking score, especially with one of them as captain. Raheem Sterling got a total rest. There was simply no need to risk him with it being 7-0 at the hour mark. Jammy points to those that captained Sterling and opted for one of the previously mentioned team mates as vice. Extra jammy points for those that had John Lundstram coming off the bench to replace him. Lundstram is a fantasy manager’s dream. Rock bottom price, playing out of position – and involved. He’s as essential as any of those City forwards.

1
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
76 390
2
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
77 380
3
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
61 377
4
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
84 373
5
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
69 371
6
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
77 368
7
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
57 365
8
Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
41 364
9
Chef Utd
Robert Frost
59 363
10
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
77 360

And there lies the difference between a red and green arrow this week. Those going up were well stocked with City players. Those going down… are mad. Biggest score of the week came from DaSilvaorthefreD, whose 84 point haul included 33 from City players, Aguero promoted to captain in Sterling’s place, Lundstram’s 12-pointer and a healthy 21 point contribution from three of the four Liverpool attacking returns.

Manager of the week – DaSilvaorthefreD – Stephen Papadopoulos – 84 points

Player of the week – Bernardo Silva – Manchester City – 19 points

Bargain of the week – Aaron Cresswell – West Ham United – 14 points

Twat of the week – Ainsley Maitland-Niles – Arsenal – -3 points

Goal of the week – N’Golo Kante. At 1m12s