Manager of the week – The Winnings R Mine – David Bruce – 121 points
Maybe it was bound to happen sooner or later. Putting the armband on Harry Kane during one of his hat trick weeks, plus the right combo of free scoring City and/or Liverpool players was going to produce a mega score at some point. And without the aid of a chip, The Winnings R Mine’s 121 points catapults them up the league from 21st to 9th and into position to grab the highest weekly score prize. Often double gameweeks don’t yield that many points. It’ll be tough to beat. It’s worth mentining Marc Albrighton and Ashley Young’s contributions as well as Marcos Alonso and Cesar Azpilicueta’s double digit hauls. It’s arguably more about the cheaper differential members of your team rather than the players that everybody else has. Honorable mentions to Emergency Gap Jumper and Mrs Magoo who also passed the century mark. The Winnings R Mine and Gap Jumpers’ scores place them in a great position to pinch the December manager of the month prize. The table currently looks like this with one gameweek to play…
Bearing in mind that it’s a reduced gameweek in which Tottenham (and Kane) and West Ham don’t play, it’s not going to be a straightforward round of matches to negotiate. Someone could jump from even further down the pack. It’s worth also bearing in mind that the resultant double gameweek is in GW22. Whether your chasing this massive monthly prize or not, the right tactics are crucial so as not to lose pace with whoever it is you don’t want to lose pace with. Oh – and Harry Kane is ill.
Player of the week – Harry Kane – 17 points
For the second consecutive week and his third overall this season. It’s taken until Christmas, but maybe – just maybe – he is going to be indispensable. And even moreso in a double gameweek – if he’s fit enough to play. Illness or no illness, is the 48 hour gap too little even for him to start two consecutive games? Are you considering a triple captain punt? It’ll be a perfect opportunity for him to register his fourth player of the week total. It would be his third in consecutive playing gameweeks – a feat which I don’t think anyone has managed previously.
Bargain of the week – Trent Alexander-Arnold – 14 points
This Liverpool defence are beginning to keep clean sheets. It’s three in their last four. They appear much more reliable against the teams they should be beating, which is encouraging to managers when those kind of fixtures roll round. Particularly seeing as how there are many cheap routes into that Liverpool back line. Alexander-Arnold and Joe Gomez are rotating the right back berth – with slightly more action for Gomez. Both come in at well under £5 million.
Twat of the week – Marcos Rojo – -1 points
Hooked after 45 minutes at 2-0 down against Burnley at Old Trafford. Maybe the Argentinian defender is not quite back up to full speed yet after a long injury lay-off. His comeback has coincided with a ropy spell at the back for United. Nine clean sheets in their first thirteen has change dramatically into just one in their last seven.
Goal of the week – Philippe Coutinho. His third contender.
Manager of the week – To Elland Back – Alan Hardy – 75 points
It definitely wasn’t the week for changing your team. You didn’t need to get Philippe Coutinho in and you didn’t need to get rid of Harry Kane. The Liverpool player, along with Roberto Firmino, was inexplicably left out of their squad for the Merseyside derby, having between the pair of them scored five in Europe in the midweek. The omens were with Kane and Spurs this week, having beaten Stoke by four goals in each of the last four games they’ve played against each other. This 5-1 victory included two goals for the games most frustrating player, who is still somehow second in the overall scoring charts. To Elland Back triple captained him, which almost guarantees you manager of the week status if you pick the right man.
Player of the week – Son Heung-Min – 16 points
It was Son who really shone for Spurs though. Last season it took him a while to get going and similarly this time round it’s only now he’s getting a run of games that he’s starting to contribute decent points returns. It looks like he might permanently fill that third attacking midfielder berth behind Kane in the Spurs line up as he did to great effect for the second half of the previous campaign. And at £7.9 million he’s a decent price for another midfield headache.
Bargain of the week – Steve Mounie – 13 points
Mounie’s only other two goals of the season came in week one. Nothing has happened since – not even an assist. We get frustrated by Harry Kane’s week on week off schedule. This bloke’s working to a week on, 15 weeks off schedule. Remember to pick him again in gameweek 31.
Twat of the week – Marvin Zeegelaar – -2 points
A short lived honeymoon period for the once unknown Watford defender of five gameweeks ago. The impressive run of four games, two assists, two clean sheets and three bonus points has now been brought to a shuddering halt by one red and a three game ban. We may never see him again.
Goal of the week – Jermain Defoe. See what happens when you pick him.
Manager of the week – Greenyteamy – Adam Greenwood – 81 points
Greenyteamy’s rise continues. They jumped on Eden Hazard’s return to the Chelsea line up back in gameweek 7. In the seven weeks since gameweek 9 he’s contributed in five – three of them have been double figure scores. This week he picked up 15 points and Greenyteamy had him as captain. A few other Buckets managers followed suit and there has been an increase in the ownership of Chelsea assets, particularly Hazard and Morata. Hornets, at the top of our league, captained Morata. As did Fun Lovren Criminals and Gotta Light in third and fourth. This shift has probably been prompted by the run of winnable fixtures Chelsea have between now and the New Year, as well as the complete unreliability of Lukaku and Kane and the slowing down of the Man City express. It seems City are in a groove now of only being able to win games 2-1 with very late winners, which isn’t good for those with City defenders, or a triple of City attackers. Points are being dropped somewhere. It’s worth noting also that Greenyteamy have achieved this rise up the table having never had Kane in their team. So there you go – you don’t need him. But dare you get rid? There’s a double gameweek just been announced. Spurs play twice in gameweek 22. This might seem like a lifetime away but such is the fixture build up it’s actually only in four weeks. So if you do get rid, the likelihood is you’re only going to want to get him back.
Player of the week – Philippe Coutinho – 18 points
Throwing another midfield spanner in the works, Coutinho’s form looks like it could be on the rise again. It’s been an in and out season dogged by injury and constant rumours of his exit to Barcelona. He’s made four double figure scores all season in just eight gameweek appearances, scoring four, making five and picking up 10 bonus points. He’s almost guaranteed to score something if he plays. Liverpool are the new City. Their goal machine has cranked up a gear since the 4-1 hammering to Spurs seven gameweeks ago. They’ve netted 19 times in the last six. And as well as considering the Chelsea fixtures for the next few weeks it may well be worth looking at Liverpool assets, particularly their front four of Coutinho, Firmino, Mane and, of course, Mohamed Salah. Salah should be a mainstay by now anyway. In among the fixture pile up expect at least three of these four to play and watch the points roll in.
Bargain of the week – Jesse Lingard – 15 points
Lingard has two double figure contributions in the last two weeks but the problem is you’re never quite sure whether he’s going to nail down a permanent starting berth in that team. He seems to be in a constant rotation with the likes of Mata, Martial and Rashford, and could quite easily be dropped for the next match. Form dictates he shouldn’t be but it is the Manc derby, so maybe Mourinho will think more defensively for that game.
Twat of the week – Davinson Sanchez – -2 points
Spurs players are not popular at the moment. The defenders are not keeping clean sheets, or in Sanchez’s case, not keeping clean sheets and getting sent off for throwing vicious elbows into the opponent’s winger’s faces. They’re dropping like flies out of fantasy teams and dropping in value. Where has Dele Alli been this season? Playing well in Europe, that’s where.
Manager of the month – Dean Cripps – Kompany & Co – 289 points
The Vinegar Pissers lead the way going into the weekend but it’s Kompany & Co that take the prize. They also switched places – 3rd and 4th – in the overall league. Kompany’s key player was Nacho Monreal. The Arsenal defender added 15 points to their score. And you probably hadn’t noticed, but that’s four shut-outs on the spin now from Wenger’s team.
Manager of the week – Stu Smith – FTM – 91 points
FTM were probably hoping for a few goals from Harry Kane, a clean sheet from Phil Jones, another dominant Man City display and maybe a piece of magic from Philippe Coutinho to amass a healthy score this week. They got all those things, but the 16 ridiculous points picked up by Marouanne Fellaini probably wasn’t expected, and it’s what pushed them to the top of the weekly charts just ahead of Neil Madrid, who gave us the first glimpse of the potential power of the fee hit.
Player of the week – Marouane Fellaini – 16 points.
This will never happen again. Not even Marouane Fellaini has Marouane Fellaini in his fantasy team.
Bargain of the week – Stephen Ward – 12 points
Second in the bonus charts for defenders and third in the bonus charts overall, Ward and the Burnley back line look the best of the cheap options in that area of the park at the moment.
Twat of the week – Tommy Smith – 0 points
It’s hard to believe that still no Palace players have landed at the bottom of the weekly charts given the amount of goals they’re shipping. Luckily for them there’s always someone slightly more expensive shipping as many goals each week. Palace players are so uninvolved they’re not even getting sent off.
Arsenal v Everton Burnley v West Ham Chelsea v Sunderland Hull v Spurs Leicester v Bournemouth Liverpool v Middlesbrough Man Utd v Crystal Palace Southampton v Stoke Swansea v West Brom Watford v Man City
We’ve made it to the final week of the season. The race for this year’s Buckets title is between three teams. When Harry Met Alli lead The Craggy Islanders by two points. Long time leaders, Aquamar, are 30 or so points back in third. WHMA have their All Out Attack chip remaining, and given the crazy goalfests you often get in gameweek 38, it might be the best time to play it. It might be what gets them over the line ahead of their rivals.
Five other teams go into the week with a realistic chance of finishing fourth. Kebab Eaters United have their All Out Attack remaining. Hedgehog Corpse have a triple captain to play, and they have Gabriel Jesus and Alexis Sanchez in their squad. Manchester City and Arsenal are two of the three teams left with something to play for and those two players were two of the top five scorers from last week’s mega double gameweek. That’s not to rule out last week’s high scorers, Edgbaston, last year’s champs, FC Caligula, and double manager of the month, Rico United. It’s the creme de la creme.
The other team with something to fight for are Liverpool, who, due to their lack of action in double gameweeks, have fallen off the fantasy radar a little. Their rout of West Ham last week, and the fact they take on a relegated Middlesbrough at home this week, should turn your attention to that elite midfield bunch of theirs for one last time this season. Philippe Coutinho seems the obvious choice and would only cost £8.6 million. They’ve also finally figured out how to defend with four clean sheets in their last five. Joel Matip leads the way in their defence with three two point bonus performances in that run.