Gameweek 37+results

1
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
62 2285
2
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
63 2217
3
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
76 2207
4
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
59 2204
5
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
63 2204
6
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
60 2193
7
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
63 2163
8
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
78 2162
9
Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
70 2157
10
Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
76 2153

As we go into the last week, 24 points separate the chasing five. Locky’s, in sixth, have their free hit remaining – the only one of the five with a remaining chip. It could be enough to see them leapfrog into second. Look out for Kebab Eaters, back in ninth, who are the only other top ten team with a chip left. They too have a free hit and could make a late charge, although they’d have to get everything right and hope for a major mess-up in those teams above them.

But Da Pitch Ain’t 1 almost got everything right this week. Their 94 points, which was the gameweek’s best, saw returns for all but two of their starting eleven, including 34 points from captain, Raheem Sterling. I doubt it’ll be enough to put them in contention for the final monthly prize. The July table currently looks like this…

1
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
63 367
2
Buffoon United
Jitesh Lakhani
72 365
3
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
63 351
4
Pukki Blinders
David Spinks
80 343
5
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
62 340
6
Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
70 337
7
Soup-or-Boom.
Ian Driver
66 334
8
Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
76 334
9
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
76 332

Our first Last Man Standing final will be between Sterling Silva, Locky Bauer Bowyer and Kebab Eaters Utd. Naston Villa and Relegation Material fell at the last this gameweek with 59 and 58 points respectively. It was very close, with Locky’s only suviving by a point. Sterling Silva go into the final week with the highest average score through July with between five to seven points more per week than their rivals. But Locky’s and Kebab Eaters have those free hits. It’s anyone’s.

 

Manager of the week – But Da Pitch Ain’t 1 – Trev Reams – 94 points

Player of the week – Raheem Sterling – Manchester City – 17 points

Bargain of the week – Erik Pieters – Burnley – 12 points

Twat of the week – Emiliano Buendia – Norwich City – -2 points

Goal of the week – Naby Keita.

Gameweek 36+ results

1
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
53 2223
2
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
64 2154
3
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
58 2145
4
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
70 2141
5
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
60 2139
6
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
58 2133
7
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
55 2100
8
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
36 2088
9
Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
71 2087
10
Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
42 2077

The top six – and it may be that we have a definite top six now – are jostling for position. Not so much Caligula, who seem destined to make it a second league title, but the following five. Again there’s been a switch round in positons with 12 points separating the weekly scores and 21 points separating them in the table. It’s going to go to the wire for all of the runner-up prizes. Sterling Silva could still catch – there’s an outside chance. There’s the motivation of knowing they’re in pole position in the race for the last monthly prize – and that they’re still in the hunt for the Last Man Standing title, in which Neil Madrid and Caligula fell short this gameweek. Sterling Silva have the highest average weekly score (70 points) since the restart, closely followed by Kebab Eaters (68 points). Making up the final five are Locky Bauer Bowyer, Nashton Villa and Relegation Material, who all average 62 points.

There’s a strong challenge to their July manager of the month chances and that’s Buffoon United, who outscored everybody else this week with 81 points. Buffoons ousted TAA, in the week he finished as worst player, for Marcos Alonso, recognising the chance of bumper points against Norwich and going so far as captaining the Chelsea wing-back. That all worked out well – and added to the regular hauls for Manchester United assets and another goal for Michail Antonio. Here’s the monthly league table with two gameweeks remaining.

1
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
55 304
2
Buffoon United
Jitesh Lakhani
81 293
3
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
64 288
4
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
53 278

 

Manager of the week – Buffoon United – Jitesh Lakhani – 81 points

Player of the week – David Silva – Manchester City – 13 points

Bargain of the week – Luke Thomas – Leicester City – 12 points

Twat of the week – Trent Alexander-Arnold – Liverpool – 0 points

Goal of the week – Raul Jimenez. 1m27s.

Gameweek 34+ results

1
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
84 2117
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
51 2037
3
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
83 2032
4
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
72 2030
5
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
74 2025
6
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
76 2018
7
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
98 2009
8
Stranger Mings
Adam Burnett
91 1981
9
Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
84 1974
10
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
82 1969

We may have our winner. As the chasing pack alternate between good gameweeks and bad gameweeks, Caligula only have good gameweeks. Another 80+ score sees them jump into the top 10k overall. And it may be five from the next six to take the runners up prizes. There’s another chasing pack of five or six teams all of whom are consistently posting 80 and 90+ scores but it’s proving to be not quite enough to claw back the gap to 6th place. Ginger Fizz have gone big again, almost hitting their third 100+ score of the season. The current Ginger Fizz tactic is score big, score 56, repeat to the end of the season. It might work.

The Fizz didn’t quite hit the century but The Islanders did. They incorporated their bench boost to accumulate 103 points and achieve the gameweek’s highest score. This included four double figure returns, one of whom was John Egan, the Sheffield United defender, who got double digits for the second consecutive week. Obviously, we’ll all be benching him next gameweek.

In Last Man Standing news – we’re down to our final nine. Six of our current top ten remain. Only Relegation Material, down in 25th, sit outside the top 12. We said goodbye to Sterling Silva in 2nd and Alisson Wonderland in 21st after this round of scores. Stranger Mings are the form team with an average of 86 points per gameweek since restart, closely followed by Caligula. Nashton and Rip Roaring Reds have the lowest average. But that average is 72 points. So, let’s just conclude that any one of these teams could win it, such is the high consistency of scoring.

Manager of the week – The Craggy Islanders – Adrian Roche – 103 points

Player of the week – Mohamed Salah – Liverpool -18 points

Bargain of the week -John Egan – Sheffield United – 15 points

Twat of the week – Federico Fernandez – Newcastle United -2 points

Goal of the week – Wilfred Zaha. 1m24s

Gameweek 29 results

I didn’t set up my team this week with an international pandemic in mind, otherwise I doubt I’d have captained Aubameyang and brought in three Arsenal players to try my luck on the double gameweek. A double gameweek that was announced and then cancelled within a matter of days. It’s clear from the league table that I’m not the only one who had pinned my hopes on some big scores coming from the teams playing twice. It can’t always be relied upon, but it’s too much of a temptation to turn down for some managers. So we’re left with a semi-complete gameweek and no idea when – or even IF – the cancelled game will get played. As it stands, GW30 is going ahead – and the blank GW31 with it’s accompanying FA Cup games. But who knows?

There has been a lot of change at the top of the league and two very closely contested and low scoring Buckets Cup semi-finals. An don’t mention Last Man Standing. I mean the prize might literally go to the last one of us able to stand.

1
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
80 1690
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
66 1686
3
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
46 1671
4
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
67 1644
5
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
43 1643
6
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
45 1632
7
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
62 1630
8
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
58 1626
9
Soup-or-Boom.
Ian Driver
70 1613
10
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
50 1592

Caligula race to the top with a week-winning score of 80 points, capitalising on the no-show of captain Kevin De Bruyne, taking five additional points from the bench and nine more from their promoted vice. Having Harvey Barnes helped. And persevering with Jamie Vardy too – in the week I feel a lot of people may have eventually got rid to accommodate Arsenal and/or Manchester City players.

It was a bad week for Nashton Villa who relinquished the top spot in the league and were knocked out of the cup. Mister D triumphed 50-46, thanks largely to Ayoze Perez not taking part in Leicester’s 4-0 thumping of Villa. A double knife to the heart of the Nashton manager. Chris Wood was promoted from the bench to the tune of 9 points, enough to see them over the line. The second semi-final was totally drab. Neil Madrid prevailed 41-37 against Queen Of The North. “You can only beat what’s put in front of you”, I will repeatedly say if anyone dare suggest it’s a fix.

Manager of the week – FC Caligula – Ajay Supeda – 80 points

Player of the week – Harvey Barnes – Leicester City – 19 points

Bargain of the week – Alex McCarthy – Southampton – 12 points

Twat of the week – Moussa Djenepo – Southampton – -2 points

Goal of the week – Mason Mount. At 28s in.

Gameweek 28 results and February Manager of the Month

The blank gameweek. So called because some teams don’t play. Or in the case of this horror show, when all your players DON’T SCORE ANY POINTS. Well done if you picked three players who returned. Congrats if you got out a full XI. Kudos if you beat the average – a measly 26. It’s definitely the lowest scoring week of the season. It may even be the lowest scoring week EVER. The same thing could have happened last week had Liverpool not brought home the bacon. Even the ever reliable champions elect couldn’t come to our rescue this time out. 

1
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
29 1625
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
26 1620
3
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
31 1610
4
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
42 1600
5
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
25 1587
6
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
29 1577
7
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
24 1572
8
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
22 1568
9
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
29 1546
10
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
18 1546

Kante Fit My Willian took the opportunity to free hit to stake a claim for the February manager of the month award. And it worked. Although I’m not sure that mustering 53 points from a free hit would normally be a satisfactory end total. Still, it was twice as much as most of the rest of us managed. The best weekly score pushed them over the line to bag the best monthly score. So…well deserved. Marcos Alonso was the difference. The Chelsea bouffant has posted some incredible stats this season. Lampard obviously doesn’t fancy him, limiting him to just nine starts, yet he’s returned in eight of those at an average of nearly 8 points a game. He’s still playing in the same way as he always used to, being so far forward, he’s in a different stadium. Will he finally nail down a place? Look out for him when Chelsea double gameweek rolls round.

The Buckets Cup semi-finalists have been decided. The unpredictability of the recent weeks has left us with two bottom half teams competing for a spot in the final. Based on their last three gameweek scores, both Mister D (48th) and Queen Of The North (40th) could be in with a chance. Both outscored their higher-placed opponents, Nashton Villa (1st) and Neil Madrid (13th)

Manager of the week – Paul Callaghan – Kante Fit My Willian – 53 points

Player of the week – Ismaila Sarr – Watford – 19 points

Bargain of the week – Jamal Lewis – Norwich City – 15 points

Twat of the week – Ezequiel Scheletto – Brighton and Hove Albion – -1 points

Goal of the week – Ismaila Sarr. 6m36s (2nd goal)