Gameweek 36+ results

1
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
53 2223
2
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
64 2154
3
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
58 2145
4
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
70 2141
5
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
60 2139
6
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
58 2133
7
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
55 2100
8
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
36 2088
9
Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
71 2087
10
Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
42 2077

The top six – and it may be that we have a definite top six now – are jostling for position. Not so much Caligula, who seem destined to make it a second league title, but the following five. Again there’s been a switch round in positons with 12 points separating the weekly scores and 21 points separating them in the table. It’s going to go to the wire for all of the runner-up prizes. Sterling Silva could still catch – there’s an outside chance. There’s the motivation of knowing they’re in pole position in the race for the last monthly prize – and that they’re still in the hunt for the Last Man Standing title, in which Neil Madrid and Caligula fell short this gameweek. Sterling Silva have the highest average weekly score (70 points) since the restart, closely followed by Kebab Eaters (68 points). Making up the final five are Locky Bauer Bowyer, Nashton Villa and Relegation Material, who all average 62 points.

There’s a strong challenge to their July manager of the month chances and that’s Buffoon United, who outscored everybody else this week with 81 points. Buffoons ousted TAA, in the week he finished as worst player, for Marcos Alonso, recognising the chance of bumper points against Norwich and going so far as captaining the Chelsea wing-back. That all worked out well – and added to the regular hauls for Manchester United assets and another goal for Michail Antonio. Here’s the monthly league table with two gameweeks remaining.

1
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
55 304
2
Buffoon United
Jitesh Lakhani
81 293
3
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
64 288
4
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
53 278

 

Manager of the week – Buffoon United – Jitesh Lakhani – 81 points

Player of the week – David Silva – Manchester City – 13 points

Bargain of the week – Luke Thomas – Leicester City – 12 points

Twat of the week – Trent Alexander-Arnold – Liverpool – 0 points

Goal of the week – Raul Jimenez. 1m27s.

Gameweek 28 results and February Manager of the Month

The blank gameweek. So called because some teams don’t play. Or in the case of this horror show, when all your players DON’T SCORE ANY POINTS. Well done if you picked three players who returned. Congrats if you got out a full XI. Kudos if you beat the average – a measly 26. It’s definitely the lowest scoring week of the season. It may even be the lowest scoring week EVER. The same thing could have happened last week had Liverpool not brought home the bacon. Even the ever reliable champions elect couldn’t come to our rescue this time out. 

1
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
29 1625
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
26 1620
3
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
31 1610
4
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
42 1600
5
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
25 1587
6
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
29 1577
7
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
24 1572
8
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
22 1568
9
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
29 1546
10
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
18 1546

Kante Fit My Willian took the opportunity to free hit to stake a claim for the February manager of the month award. And it worked. Although I’m not sure that mustering 53 points from a free hit would normally be a satisfactory end total. Still, it was twice as much as most of the rest of us managed. The best weekly score pushed them over the line to bag the best monthly score. So…well deserved. Marcos Alonso was the difference. The Chelsea bouffant has posted some incredible stats this season. Lampard obviously doesn’t fancy him, limiting him to just nine starts, yet he’s returned in eight of those at an average of nearly 8 points a game. He’s still playing in the same way as he always used to, being so far forward, he’s in a different stadium. Will he finally nail down a place? Look out for him when Chelsea double gameweek rolls round.

The Buckets Cup semi-finalists have been decided. The unpredictability of the recent weeks has left us with two bottom half teams competing for a spot in the final. Based on their last three gameweek scores, both Mister D (48th) and Queen Of The North (40th) could be in with a chance. Both outscored their higher-placed opponents, Nashton Villa (1st) and Neil Madrid (13th)

Manager of the week – Paul Callaghan – Kante Fit My Willian – 53 points

Player of the week – Ismaila Sarr – Watford – 19 points

Bargain of the week – Jamal Lewis – Norwich City – 15 points

Twat of the week – Ezequiel Scheletto – Brighton and Hove Albion – -1 points

Goal of the week – Ismaila Sarr. 6m36s (2nd goal)

Gameweek 9 results

A year ago the leaders of the Buckets league had 621 points. They were 100 points ahead of 14th place. Already, three quarters of the league were out of the title race. Our best managers had cracked the season’s code early and were moving at pace. We had a good mix of elite players staying in form (Hazard, Salah, Robertson) and differential cheap picks to fit the budget (Wan Bissaka, Wolves assets). Fast forward a year. This week sees our leader limp to 525 points. You have to drop to 51st place to go back 100 points. Lower-mid table languishers need not worry just yet. You still might win.

1
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
49 525
2
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
54 516
3
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
35 513
4
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
40 511
5
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
52 507
6
Chef Utd
Robert Frost
48 502
7
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
37 496
8
Greeenteeaaam
adam greenwood
43 494
9
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
35 494
10
Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
45 493

Captain choices are so hard. There’s almost too much choice some weeks. Most captained this week was Sergio Aguero…closely followed by Tammy Abraham and Callum Wilson. Aguero’s benching wouldn’t necessarily of promoted anyone decent from vice captain either. Abraham and Wilson blanked. Only Sterling of the £10 million+ players picked up any attacking points – and then he got carded. You needed to have had the heavily rotated David Silva lined up to take the armband.

Just like league leaders, Sterling Silva, who would have been sweating on an Aguero one minute cameo more than anyone. Silva’s eventual 22 points saw them rise to the top of the table ahead of Musttryharder, who climbed to second with a 54 point haul, one of only five scores over 50. The highest score, a 56 by Pretty Schitty City, was aided by a handy 13 point haul from Jack Grealish. That’s four attacking contributions in three weeks for the Villa captain. Another mid-price one to watch.

Extra jammy points to those who may have profited from everyone’s favourite first sub, John Lundstram, coming off their bench to replace Aguero or Salah. And probably not for the first time this season. And that’s kind of what FPL has come to. Crossing fingers for a Sheffield United clean sheet (because that’s evidently more likely than Aubameyang scoring), to score 6 points from a guy whose starting price was £4 million – because your £11 million strikers are benched, or just bollocks.

Manager of the week – Pretty Schitty City – Alex Michaluk – 56 points

Player of the week – Marcos Alonso – Chelsea – 14 points

Bargain of the week – Jack Grealish – Aston Villa – 13 points

Twat of the week – Aaron Mooy – Brighton and Hove Albion – -2 points

Goal of the week – David Silva. 33s in

 

 

Gameweek 26 results

1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
94 1666
2  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
77 1634
3  down Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
66 1624
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
59 1601
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
68 1565
6  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
89 1565
7  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
82 1554
8  down INIT FC
Mustafa khan
72 1550
9  same FTM
Stu Smith
68 1541
10  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
67 1525
11  up King raggg
Steven Darling
74 1518
12  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
65 1506
13  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
59 1506
14  same Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
71 1500
15  same Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
62 1490
16  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
64 1485
17  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
76 1462
18  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
51 1462
19  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
84 1460
20  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
82 1455
21  up Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
82 1454
22  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
58 1450
23  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
38 1435
24  same Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
71 1433
25  same Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
69 1430
26  same RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
70 1428
27  same Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
58 1402
28  same Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
49 1392
29  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
75 1382
30  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
52 1380
31  up Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
56 1377
32  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
53 1376
33  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
77 1374
34  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
67 1373
35  same El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
58 1367
35  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
45 1367
37  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
68 1365
38  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
85 1355
39  same Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
57 1353
40  up ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
77 1351
41  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
55 1351
42  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
75 1342
43  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
42 1337
44  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
50 1334
45  up Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
94 1328
46  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
30 1307
47  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
72 1293
48  same Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
56 1264
49  same Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
47 1242
50  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
43 1213
51  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
76 1157

 

Buckets Cup 1st round

There were some very closely fought games this week with ten of the sixteen being won by less than 10 points – five of those by just a 2 point margin. Ross’s Champions continue their progress by knocking out the reigning champs, Puddle Splash Van – we’re yet to have a manager retain the cup. Shoelace were knocked out in the tie of the round on 82 points – only five teams scored more points than that in the entire league this gameweek.

Top of the League – But Da Pitch Ain’t 1 – Trev Reams – 1666 points

The last two weeks have produced a bit of a change at the top. It’s still the same four teams, but the order has changed and the points spread has widened. And the teams in the chasing pack are also within shooting distance. Da Pitch have posted two 90+ scores to leap back into the top 5k in the world and build a lead of 32 points over The Craggy Islanders, who occupy their highest position of the season. Neil Madrid have dropped back after two shocking weeks of bad captain choices and a risky hokey-cokey transfer policy.

Manager of the week – Pique Blinders – Colin Goulding – 94 points (14 bps)

Pique’s match Da Pitch for points and goals this week but triumphed in the meaningless quest to be manager of the week by virtue of picking up more bonus points. It’s a score that puts them in contention for a charge at the manager of the month prize. Eight goals scored and four players collecting top bonus is a great return. Some teams will welcome the two week cup break. It might have come at the wrong time for Pique’s.

Player of the week – Raheem Sterling – Manchester City – 18 points

Pipping his hat trick scoring team mate by one point, despite scoring one less goal and one less bonus point. No less annoying for those that saw fit to dispense of City players with the prospect of what should have been a much tougher match against Chelsea and the fact they have a blank coming up next time out. City have refound their form (again) and Sterling becomes the first player to achieve a player of the week award twice this season. It’s the seventh player award for their team overall. Will they have another blip to throw the game into complete disarray again?

Bargain of the week – Chris Wood – Burnley – 13 points

Burnley look OK now. Wood and his team mate, Ashley Barnes, are in among the form strikers and look like a tempting pick for the forthcoming blank. They have five and four goals respectively in the last seven games. It’s a run that has seen them climb to relative safety in the league and they look set to continue the partnership for the foreseeable.

Twat of the week – Marcos Alonso – Chelsea – -1 points

Take your pick of the Chelsea defence. If Alonso is still stinking up your backline it’s surely now time to dispense. Worse still if you re-invested in Chelsea after they beat Huddersfield. Remember they were thumped for four by Bournemouth in the game before. The top four look so much more reliable for big priced players at the moment. Hazard could quite easily go on another six week holiday before his next big haul.

Goal of the week – Anthony Martial. At 1m31s

 

Gameweek 2 results

1  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
89 191
2  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
86 175
3  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
88 172
4  down Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
79 171
5  down But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
77 170
6  same King raggg
Steven Darling
82 166
7  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
83 164
8  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
95 159
9  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
84 158
9  up CAS Vampire Slayers
Mustafa khan
81 158
11  up Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
85 157
12  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
78 155
13  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
87 154
14  up DoubleDee
Noel Driver
79 149
15  up Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
92 148
15  up Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
87 148
17  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
86 147
18  down RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
54 145
18  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
63 145
18  up PenshawPerformers
david bruce
80 145
21  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
69 143
21  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
74 143
23  up Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
93 142
24  up SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
86 139
25  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
69 133
26  up Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
70 127
27  down Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
53 126
28  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
71 125
29  up Cookie fc
Peter Cook
68 121
30  up Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
71 119
30  down ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
48 119
32  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
66 118
33  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
49 117
34  same Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
63 115
35  up FTM
Stu Smith
70 113
36  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
68 109
37  up Ross’s champions
darren frankland
76 108
38  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
54 108
39  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
54 106
40  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
58 106
41  down Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
45 102
42  down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
47 102
43  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
51 99
44  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
65 99
45  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
51 98
46  same Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
59 98
47  up Morningblues
Jeff Morning
54 91
48  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
40 91
49  down Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
45 88
50  down Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
45 87
51  down The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
43 85
52  same Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
41 68

 

Manager of the week – Upper Bullens – Andy Taylor – 95 points

Storming starts by lots of managers all thanks to doubling and tripling up on the two title favourites. Six goals for Liverpool without reply and eight for Manchester City with a single goal in the against column have helped towards some impressive looking totals in the first two weeks. There were three more 90+ scores and over half of us topping the 60 point average. And most of those were as a result of having Sergio Aguero as captain. The home tie against Huddersfield was too much to resist and the City striker duly delivered to the tune of 40 points with the armband. Bullens were the best with Marcos Alonso contributing 13 points and being one of only two players to post two double figure scores; and Richarlison scoring his third goal of the season and adding 9 more points to the 14 he got last week. They move up to eighth overall and lie just over 30 points behind the leaders, Perifidious Albion, who opted for a curious wildcard and could have surpassed the century mark again had they captained Sergio over that Harry Kane bloke. I’m not having that prick anywhere near my team this year.

Player of the week – Sergio Aguero – Manchester City – 20 points

This year’s Kane? Blanks then hat tricks. Then blanks. Then hat tricks. As long as it’s alternate weeks. Given the run of fixtures City have, it could be every week. They don’t get tough till October. The run till then sees them take on the other five promoted teams of the last two seasons.

Bargain of the week – Neil Etheridge – Cardiff City – 16 points

The goalkeeper no-one wanted. The goalkeeper with twice as many points as pretty much every other keeper. How long can that last? As long as Cardiff keep conceding penalties – it can last forever.

Twat of the week – Terence Kongolo – Huddersfield Town – -3 points

Huddersfield started last season with a run of clean sheets. Although that was never likely to happen coming up against Chelsea and City in their first two games, it looks like, with nine goals conceded, that they’re the team to avoid for defensive options. Five of the seven defenders that have turned out for them so far this season still haven’t made it past 0 points. Three of them have minus scores. One of them is Terence Kongolo.

Goal of the week – Will Hughes.