Gameweek 2 results

NORWICH ARE BACK have changed their name…to Pukki Blinders. Do they have Teemu Pukki? Er, no. Well, they probably do now, like the rest of us. A sharp price rise up to £6.7 million could hike up even further by the start of GW3. His ownership appears to have trebled from GW1 to now. The market seems pretty volatile at the moment and I reckon there are going to be a lot more wildcards played this week than were maybe first planned as a result of not being able to afford certain players. Pukki’s the first and only to see a £0.2 million rise so far. That going to cause some managers to have to look at taking a cheaper option somewhere else in their team. And that cheaper option might not be John Lundstram anymore. Is the Sheffield United man this season’s Wan Bissaka? A regular £4.0 starter? Not only that, but listed as a defender and playing out of position as a midfielder. Watch his price rises closely. He could be another very quickly adding £0.2 million to his value.

There aren’t many Pukki owners among us at all. Plenty of Lundstram lovers…with him warming their bench. Our highest scoring manager, Rock Ya-Sin, who moves up to 32nd place with a 65 point haul, collected their big points from a shrewd captain pick, guessing Sadio Mane would pick up where he left off at the end of last season. Is Mane the Liverpool attacker to have? Ahead of Salah?

1
Cook Pass Babtridge
Marcus Baker
51 150
2
Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
57 140
3
Show Me Da Mane
Jason Earwicker
62 138
4
The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
60 137
5
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
59 137
5
FTM
Stu Smith
46 137
7
Greeenteeaaam
adam greenwood
52 136
8
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
47 135
9
The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
57 133
10
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
50 132

Our leading pack all posted good 10-15 points above average scores with Cook Pass Babtridge holding onto their lead. Perfidious and The Islanders have moved into the top 10 and a special mention to The Mindless Morons – totally Sunderland-esque in their love of the arse-end of the table, but now perched with a nosebleed in fourth.

Player of the week – Teemu Pukki – Norwich City – 17 points

Bargain of the week – John Lundstram – Sheffield United – 14 points

Twat of the week – Paul Pogba – Manchester United – 0 points

Goal of the week – Douglas Luiz. 

Close run thing this week. Pukki’s volley misses out because the keeper got a paw to it. Harsh, I know, but it’s my blog. Also, an honorable mention for Ruben Neves’s curler for Wolves against Man Utd.

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Gameweek 1 results

1 Cook Pass Babtridge
Marcus Baker
99 99
2 RED FIVE
mark frankland
96 96
3 Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
94 94
4 Rico United
JASON REACHER
92 92
5 FTM
Stu Smith
91 91
6 Getthebubbleonbud
scott mcgow
90 90
7 To do is to dare
Matt Jarvis
89 89
8 Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
88 88
8 Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
88 88
10 Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
86 86

We’re off. GW1 has delivered. We had a 100+, three 90+ and a top nine all above 80 points last season. We’ve arguably bettered that this season. Although not topping the century mark, we did see a third of our teams better 80 points. Just about everybody in the top half picked Mo Salah and Raheem Sterling. We all preferred Salah as the captain choice but it was the Man City man who came out on top in terms of points. He delivered a season starting hat trick in a regular routine victory over West Ham and with it came an almost instantaneous price rise. Cook Pass Babtridge’s week winning score owed more to their differential picks, namely Willy Boly and Divock Origi. Origi may not start again for a while once Sadio Mane’s back, but it was worth the one week punt at £5.5 million to get the 12 points he served up.

Manager of the week – Marcus Baker – Cook Pass Babtridge – 99 points

Player of the week – Raheem Sterling – Manchester City – 20 points

Bargain of the week – Eric Pieters – Burnley – 14 points

Twat of the week – Grant Hanley – Norwich City -2 points

Goal of the week – Tanguy Ndombele 

Debut goal. Looks like one to monitor. (1m12s in)

 

 

Gameweek 38 and May Manager of the Month

1  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
64 2448
2  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
63 2406
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
55 2381
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
62 2344
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
63 2323
6  same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
58 2314
7  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
71 2269
8  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
69 2259
9  up Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
70 2219
10  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
40 2218
11  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
59 2216
12  same FTM
Stu Smith
67 2190
13  same Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
56 2171
14  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
78 2163
15  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
51 2150
16  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
49 2144
17  up King raggg
Steven Darling
68 2144
18  down Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
53 2137
19  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
59 2122
20  same Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
51 2113
21  same Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
49 2104
22  up Cookie fc
Peter Cook
45 2091
23  down Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
36 2086
24  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
68 2080
25  up RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
73 2068
26  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
72 2067
27  up SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
80 2063
28  down Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
39 2060
29  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
44 2047
30  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
48 2042
31  up Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
63 2037
32  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
39 2031
33  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
77 2025
34  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
68 2013
35  up Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
65 1999
36  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
67 1999
37  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
93 1998
38  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
31 1995
39  same Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
88 1995
40  up QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
76 1978
41  down Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
53 1964
42  same El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
61 1962
43  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
68 1961
44  same Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
60 1934
45  same Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
52 1924
46  same Morningblues
Jeff Morning
58 1901
47  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
55 1876
48  same ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
66 1871
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
56 1796
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
60 1714

 

May Manager of the Month – Queen of the North – Dorine Reacher – 76 points

The two week sprint to become May manager of the month was won by Queen of the North. Despite racking up some big totals over the season and winning three weekly awards (the joint highest), consistency was lacking. They won by a point, playing their free hit and bench boost in the last two weeks. A curious decision which only just worked.

Manager of the week – Atletico Chappers – Richard Chapman – 93 points

Chappers’ season panned out in a similar fashion to QOTN’s. Occasional mega totals were lost in among a sea of guff. This is also their third weekly triumph. They challenged for the highest weekly score prize with a 121 point total in GW35 and won the February manager of the month off the back of an 86 point haul in GW27 – the 1,226th best score in the world that week. Chappers regularly jumped a million in rank one week only to plummet back to where they started the next.

Player of the week – Nathaniel Mendez-Laing – Cardiff City – 16 points

Only 3,002 players benefited from Mendez-Laing’s weekly high in the entire game. He claims Cardiff’s fourth weekly player accolade, two more than the “team” they beat this week, Manchester United. In fact, United only managed two player awards, joint equal lowest with Fulham and Huddersfield. Cardiff went down on a deserved high given the tragedy that beset them earlier in the season.

Bargain of the week – Fabian Schar – Newcastle United – 15 points

Schar’s third player award – one more than Manchester United. An impressive return for a cut price Newcastle defender who only played two thirds of the season’s games. Newcastle were on the right side of a typical GW38 thumping with the Swiss scoring, keeping a clean sheet and collecting top bonus.

Twat of the week – Jose Holebas – Watford – -4 points

Picked up the first twat of last season and the last of this – plus a few more in between I think. This list isn’t complete without an appearance from Jose. Well done son. You made it.

Goal of the week – Jefferson Lerma. Screamer 1m48s.

Gameweek 37 results

1  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
43 2388
2  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
43 2347
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
41 2326
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
39 2286
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
53 2272
6  same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
72 2264
7  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
44 2198
8  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
65 2194
9  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
53 2178
10  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
31 2157
11  same Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
50 2149
12  same FTM
Stu Smith
27 2123
13  same Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
31 2115
14  same Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
38 2099
15  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
68 2095
16  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
63 2085
17  down Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
36 2084
18  same King raggg
Steven Darling
54 2076
19  down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
49 2071
20  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
49 2062
21  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
33 2055
22  same Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
48 2050
23  up Cookie fc
Peter Cook
76 2046
24  down Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
32 2029
25  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
58 2012
26  same Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
51 2007
27  down RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
41 1999
28  up Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
56 1998
29  down Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
43 1995
30  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
46 1992
31  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
45 1983
32  same Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
44 1974
33  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
45 1968
34  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
53 1949
35  same The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
56 1948
36  up Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
55 1934
37  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
53 1932
38  up Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
78 1911
39  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
62 1907
40  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
39 1905
41  up QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
75 1902
42  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
36 1901
43  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
65 1893
44  down Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
50 1874
45  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
47 1872
46  same Morningblues
Jeff Morning
28 1843
47  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
23 1821
48  same ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
77 1813
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
68 1740
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
47 1654

 

Top of the league – The Craggy Islanders – Adrian Roche – 2388 points

Nothing has changed at the top. The Islanders and Da Pitch equaled each others totals – with below average scores – and so remain 41 points apart. The Islanders still have the triple captain to play and it’s difficult to see that lead being overturned. Albion also posted a below average score but should be safe in 3rd given Madrid’s inability to close the gap. If anything is going to change in the prize money positions it’s a possible usurping of Madrid by Bielsa Ringing or Caligula who are now just 14 and 22 points behind respectively.

Manager of the week – Greeenteeam – Adrian Greenwood – 78 points

All of the top six suffered as a result of Son Heung-Min’s uncharacteristic red card. Caligula had the right back up in the shape of a Laporte, Doherty, TAA triple double figure defence, and more tellingly, a captain that delivered. It was a damp squib of a week for the majority of the league and it was only those, like Caligula, who veered away from captaining City or Liverpool that really excelled. You have to travel to the depths of the league to find those 70+ totals that really moved managers up the rankings. Greeenteeam performed best, also captaining Hazard, but also by remembering they still had a bench boost and claiming 12 extra points.

Player of the week – David Luiz – Chelsea – 15 points

The most popular captain choice this week was Sergio Aguero – the majority swayed by the fact he’d contributed goal and/or assist points at every home game he’d started this season. It was, however, a week in which defenders ruled and not just through clean sheet keeping but for their additional goal scoring and assist making exploits. David Luiz came out on top against a Watford team clearly saving themselves for Wembley. His clean sheet and goal take him to his highest season total to date.

Bargain of the week – Ryan Fredericks – West Ham United – 14 points

Fredericks would have equaled the Chelsea man had he picked up top bonus. West Ham were comfortable victors in their last home game of the season – a factor always worth considering in these final two gameweeks. Six of the home outfits managed a victory to nil this week.

Twat of the week – Son Heung-Min – Tottenham Hotspur – -2 points

Who else? He was in a lot of teams given Spurs’ double gameweek possibilities and probably the final nail in the coffin for so many. Those owners may take some consolation in a hefty chunk of money readily available for a last week transfer punt

Goal of the week – Vincent Kompany.

Gameweek 36 results and April Manager of the Month

1  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
104 2345
2  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
105 2304
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
95 2285
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
79 2247
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
85 2223
6  same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
121 2196
7  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
98 2158
8  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
83 2137
9  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
88 2126
10  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
125 2125
11  same Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
86 2099
12  down FTM
Stu Smith
82 2096
13  same Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
86 2084
14  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
110 2061
15  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
115 2048
16  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
82 2043
17  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
117 2026
18  down King raggg
Steven Darling
74 2026
19  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
72 2022
20  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
62 2022
21  same Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
90 2017
22  same Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
76 2002
23  down Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
52 1997
24  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
53 1970
25  same RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
62 1958
26  up Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
97 1956
27  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
74 1954
28  same Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
87 1952
29  up PenshawPerformers
david bruce
85 1946
30  up Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
91 1946
31  down SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
78 1938
32  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
66 1934
33  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
59 1923
34  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
94 1896
35  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
96 1896
36  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
69 1883
37  same Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
81 1879
38  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
72 1866
39  same El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
80 1865
40  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
86 1845
41  same Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
58 1833
42  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
85 1833
43  down Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
59 1832
44  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
95 1828
45  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
57 1827
46  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
51 1815
47  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
73 1798
48  same ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
46 1736
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
57 1672
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
71 1607

 

Top of the league – The Craggy Islanders – Adrian Roche – 2345 points

Da Pitch aren’t giving up on that title yet. They’re making every effort to close that gap. Scoring 105 points should help, unless the team you’re chasing racks up 104. The big scores were plentiful this week – seven in triple figures – only one less than last week. Albion aren’t out of contention either, posting 95 points. Our leaders however, crucially, still have their triple captain.

April manager of the month – Kebab Eaters United – Paul Howard – 351 points

April has probably produced a Buckets record for the highest monthly score for a four week game month. It took Kebab Eaters 351 points to win it – which included two 100+ scores. We’re looking at an average score of close to 90 points a week. Mentions too for the Islanders, Caligula and Da Pitch who weren’t far behind, also averaging an 80+ weekly total.

1  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
117 351
2  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
104 344
3  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
121 330
4  up But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
105 330

Manager of the week – Rip Roaring Reds – Sean Whyton – 125 points

For the second successive week we have a highest weekly score of 125 points. It was the triple captain chip that garnered the triple figure totals this week. And it was the triple captaining of one player in particular, Mo Salah, that reaped the greatest reward. The Islanders held the highest weekly score prize for one week only – they only scored four goals to the Reds’ seven. Most of us realised that all out Liverpool was the way to go with them coming up against the whippiest of whipping boys, Huddersfield. I suspect the Islanders are saving their triple captain for the last gameweek – a tactic which I think they’ve employed before – but had they gone with it they’d have accumulated the highest weekly score, won the manager of the week, the manager of the month AND probably sewn up the Buckets title.

Player of the week – Mohamed Salah – Liverpool – 19 points

It’s Salah’s second player of the week award. What a week to land the triple captain chip. He was always going to be the one and this Huddersfield fixture was always likely to be the game. There have been frustrating moments throughout the fantasy season for Salah owners, but he’s still leading scorer, and now by a fair distance. It appears that by not reaching the heights of last season he’s unworthy of a player of the year nomination or a place in the team of the year. Nonsense.

Bargain of the week – Cyrus Christie – Fulham – 11 points

Three consecutive clean sheets for Fulham. How did that happen? There’s no point in discussing this any further. Only ghost ships own Fulham defenders.

Twat of the week – Ainsley Maitland-Niles – Arsenal – -2 points

Doesn’t anybody want Champions League football next season? Maitland-Niles did Arsenal’s Europa League cause more good with dopey 30 minute red. He was on the Rip Roaring Reds’ bench. A smart place to put him.

Goal of the week – Ryan Babel. No vid.