Gameweek 23 results

You either captained De Bruyne and spent 24 hours cursing his no-show until celebrating Jamie Vardy’s penalty miss like he’d scored a hat trick in a week that you’d captained him. Or, you celebrated De Bruyne’s no-show in expectation of a massive rank rise off the back of a Jamie Vardy goal blitz, and then wished you’d captained De Bruyne, even if it was just for four points.

Or you wildcarded, like The Craggy Islanders, drafted in Sergio Aguero and basked in the glory of the brace that secured the week’s highest Buckets total. That same wildcard has set the Islanders up nicely for Liverpool’s double header in the next gameweek. Most managers seem to have a Liverpool plan in place, with at least two of Salah, Mane, TAA, Robertson, Van Dijk or Firmino in place already. Not a lot of West Ham interest though. 

1
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
35 1364
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
50 1350
3
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
46 1341
4
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
69 1323
5
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
39 1323
6
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
31 1321
7
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
33 1315
8
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
34 1313
9
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
51 1310
10
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
45 1304

Nashton were the big movers this week, scoring 69 to shoot up into fourth and the prize money places. And that with both De Bruyne and Vardy as captain. They fluked Spurs’ only clean sheet this millennium, coupled with a penalty save for Paulo Gazzaniga, another double figure return for Jack Grealish, an assist for Mason Holgate (!) and clean sheet and bonus points for Reece James, who was conveniently hooked before Newcastle’s winning goal. 

Manager of the week – The Craggy Islanders – Adrian Roche – 70 points

Player of the week – Virgil Van Dijk – Liverpool – 15 points

Bargain of the week – Paulo Gazzaniga – Tottenham Hotspur – 14 points

Twat of the week – Steve Cook – Bournemouth – -2 points

Goal of the week – Jack Grealish. 1m27s

 

Gameweek 19 results

The week in which Liverpool won the title. The week in which Trent Alexander-Arnold broke FPL. If you had him – green arrow and a massive rank rise. For the rest of us, weeks and weeks of good work undone in one 90 minute display. The Liverpool right back (imagine running a game from right back) collected the highest weekly score of the season so far with 24 points. It’ll take a double gameweek score to beat that. Probably his own double gameweek score in GW24. Liverpool and West Ham will play their rescheduled fixture then.

1
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
62 1162
2
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
50 1111
3
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
44 1107
4
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
71 1107
5
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
56 1104
6
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
57 1099
7
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
52 1088
8
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
35 1087
9
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
56 1085
10
Soup-or-Boom.
Ian Driver
58 1081

Buffoon United have been making steady progress over the last few weeks and with one round of December fixtures left to play they find themsleves top of the monthly league. They’ve climbed to 13th in Buckets and seen an overall rank rise of around 600,000.

1
Buffoon United
Jitesh Lakhani
319
2
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
317
3
Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
306
3
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
306
5
Reluctant Soldier
Trevor Gordon
303
6
Pukki Blinders
David Spinks
299
7
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
299
8
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
297

To totally contradict my opening statement, their 83 points, the highest Buckets score of the gameweek, did not include TAA. Instead, they built their total around four double-digit, match-winning performances. Harry Kane starred as captain. Anthony Martial hasn’t been injured now for nearly a month and offers great value going forward, playing out of position and for less than £8 million. Adama Traore finished off City, yet the real differential in the Buffoon ranks is Djibril Sidibe. He has nailed down a right wing-back berth in an Everton team who should see results pick up with Carlo Ancelotti’s appointment. Even in the last days of Marco Silva and under Duncan Ferguson their were signs of Sidibe’s potential. The Buffoons may be the only one of us who have jumped on this. Four assists, three clean sheets and four bonus points in eight games hasn’t yet prompted a price rise, but it’s surely only a matter of time.

Manager of the week – Bufoon United – Jitesh Lakhani – 83 points

Player of the week – Trent Alexander-Arnold – Liverpool – 24 points

Bargain of the week – Adama Traore – Wolverhampton Wanderers – 13 points

Twat of the week – Ederson Moraes – Manchester City – -3 points

Goal of the week – Jordan Ayew. 2m33s in.

Gameweek 12 results

Spot the top 10 team without Jamie Vardy in their ranks. Captaining him this week probably earned you a score over 70. The move towards Vardy as the popular captain choice probably had a lot to do with City and Liverpool playing each other, but whose to say it won’t continue given the form that he and Leicester are in and their upcoming run of tasty fixtures. Can you see him not scoring against Brighton, Villa, Watford, Everton and Norwich?

1
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
63 755
2
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
66 730
3
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
78 722
4
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
73 718
5
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
69 707
6
GingerFizz
Noel Driver
75 705
7
DaSilvaortheFreD
Stephen Papadopoulos
62 690
8
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
60 689
9
Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
46 679
10
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
72 675

Romeoshondavan chalked up their first manager of the week award with a 79 point haul. They felt the need to take an 8 point hit, following on from a 4 point hit last week. Those six transfers have stopped a pretty hefty slide down the rankings that saw them plummet 1.4 million places between gameweek 7 and 10. They’re clawed 700,000 of those places back as a result.

Manager of the week – Romeoshondavan – Rob Hewer – 79 points

Player of the week – James Tarkowski – Burnley – 12 points

Bargain of the week – Gerard Deulefeu – Watford – 12 points

Twat of the week – Davy Propper – Brighton and Hove Albion – -1 points

Goal of the week – Fabinho

Gameweek 5 results

King Ragg achieved the highest total of the gameweek, having taken somewhat of a punt away from Man City and Liverpool and opting for Son Heung Min as their captain. They couldn’t gave picked a better player. Spurs’ South Korean striker outscored all of his contemporaries, hauling 16 points in their demolition of Crystal Palace. This is a Spurs side that haven’t looked completely at the races so far this season  – and a player who is often rested after returning from international duty, so there was a definite element of risk. Ragg also had Sadio Mane and Tammy Abraham in their ranks. They plundered a further five goals between them.

1
Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
64 323
2
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
77 316
3
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
69 314
4
The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
40 309
5
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
58 308
6
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
56 308
7
Cook Pass Babtridge
Marcus Baker
47 306
8
Chef Utd
Robert Frost
66 304
9
The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
54 303
10
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
62 303

Liverpool did what they were supposed to against Newcastle, although not without conceding and losing clean sheet points again. Those of us, and there were many, who hoped for a Manchester City goalfest, probably earned more points from their Norwich assets – providing they hadn’t benched them. It brings into question City’s potential going forward, although they’ve an awesome run of fixtures and surely should never be discounted. Mane over Salah though – that could be worth some serious consideration before their values move closer together.

Manager of the week – King Ragg – Steven Darling – 78 points

Player of the week – Son Heung-Min – Tottenham Hotspur – 16 points

Bargain of the week – Serge Aurier – Tottenham Hotspur – 14 points

Twat of the week – Patrick Van Aanholt – Crystal Palace – -2 points

Goal of the week – Fikayo Tomori.

 

Gameweek 4 and August Manager of the Month

The Mindless Morons have hung on. And by a safe distance. And by doing something that no other fantasy player has ever done – gaining from points scored by Jordan Ayew. The Morons have a lot to thank Palace for. Aswell as Ayew, PVA pulled in another clean sheet, a score that’s taken him to the top of the defender charts. Sergio Aguero and, at last, a clean sheet from Andy Robertson, were the other notable contributors. Sergio’s price has risen. It’s amazing it’s taken so long for him to increase his value by £0.1 million, given he’s the game’s current top scorer and has returned in every gameweek.

1
The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
58 269
2
Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
65 259
2
Cook Pass Babtridge
Marcus Baker
51 259
4
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
57 252
5
BASHAM’S ARRIVING!
Tim Dodd
78 250
6
The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
73 249
7
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
73 245
7
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
73 245
9
Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
53 244
10
Sterling Silva
DEAN CRIPPS
70 241

It was another bumper week for goals and although clean sheets were thin on the ground again, City and Liverpool shut their opponents out, so Buckets back lines contributed more than in the first three weeks. Those who kept patience with the likes of TAA, Robertson, Zinchenko etc have finally got their reward.  It was a high average score as a result and the 87 points posted by Rip Roaring Reds was the best of the week. The Reds prospered due to 51 points from their City assets, and another player finally coming good, Youri Tielemans. There’ll be more to follow from him as well you’d expect.

August Manager of the Month – John Seacroft – The Mindless Morons – 269 points

Manager of the week – Sean Whyton – Rip Roaring Reds – 87 points

Player of the week – Jamie Vardy – Leiciester City – 16 points

Bargain of the week – Arthur Masuaku – West Ham United – 12 points

Twat of the week – Trezeguet – Aston Villa – -2 points

Goal of the week – Jamie Vardy. Reminded me of 2015/16.