Gameweek 30 results

March 13, 2018

1  up Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
43 1748
2  down Hornets
Andrew Wade
23 1745
3  same The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
48 1744
4  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
49 1724
5  up Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
59 1710
6  same Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
37 1705
7  up Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
48 1700
8  same Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
47 1699
9  down The winnings R mine
david bruce
31 1698
10  down Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
14 1697
11  same greenyteamy
adam greenwood
41 1687
12  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
64 1687
13  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
42 1672
14  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
47 1668
15  up Queen of the north
DORINE REACHER
52 1662
16  up Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
62 1655
17  down It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
36 1655
18  same Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
53 1654
19  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
31 1651
20  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
38 1638
21  down Rico united
JASON REACHER
42 1638
22  same We are Ayling
Paul Murray
37 1629
23  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
45 1626
24  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
46 1616
25  up Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
72 1609
26  same Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
37 1599
27  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
24 1597
28  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
54 1594
29  same Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
47 1591
30  down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
25 1587
31  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
33 1585
32  down musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
28 1570
33  up Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
47 1569
34  same King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
34 1565
35  up To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
45 1564
36  down Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
20 1564
37  down blakes11
Steven Darling
37 1553
38  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
31 1547
39  same mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
69 1530
40  same cookster fc
Peter Cook
54 1510
41  up FTM
Stu Smith
45 1484
42  up Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
56 1475
43  down Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
25 1474
44  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
48 1471
45  down Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
23 1470
46  down iamgroot
scott mcgow
50 1469
47  same disco dancer
darren frankland
24 1416
48  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
39 1408
49  same Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
42 1389
50  same Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
57 1268

 

Buckets Cup semi finals

The final of the 2018 Buckets Cup will be between Game Of Throw Ins and Emergency Gap Jumper. GOTI beat Hornets, who had the unluckiest of gameweeks. As well as semi final defeat, they also lost their lead at the top of the table, no thanks to their strike force accumulating -1 points from 43 minutes of football played between them. They weren’t the only team to suffer from the Jordan Ayew sending off and the Harry Kane injury. Most of us had Harry Kane as captain. Emergecy Gap jumper were one of the few to continue with Mo Salah. In truth, had both EGJ and their opponents, Atletico Chappers, chose Kane, the result wouldn’t have been any different, but following that rare blank from the Egyptian, a single goal from the Spurs striker would have seen Chappers progress at EGJ’s expense. And now we’re wondering whether he’s out for the season.

It’s pure coincidence that the final has been drawn to be played in the reduced GW31. It’ll be interesting to see how our finalists play it. As it stands both teams have six potential starters and a remaining wildcard. Game Of Throw Ins have two free transfers. Arguably, they’re also in with a chance of league victory, sitting just 41 points behind our top team. EGJ are 94 points back from first and 70 points adrift from fourth. There’s an outside chance of league money, but that’s a lot less likely than their opponents. Of the eight teams that are playing, there’s not an awful lot to choose from. I guarantee three Liverpool players in both teams, but after that you’re picking and choosing from a pretty woeful bunch, bar maybe Xherdan Shaqiri. Only four players appear in the top 30 overall scorers. Where’s it going to leave you by the time GW32 comes round?

Manager of the week – David Caldicott – Crazylegs XI – 72 points

Classic ghostship material. Here we all are trying to negotiate the choppy waters ahead leading into GW31 and from out of nowhere comes Crazylegs, who lost interest around Christmas, captained by David Silva. They’ve been captained by David Silva since November. All the way through the time he was out and back in Spain for family reasons. They took eight points from the bench from two replacement players. They picked up six points from the first Arsenal clean sheet since the days of John Lukic and leapt eight places above a clutch of teams who I guarantee spent all week agonising over their team picks. Bastards.

Player of the week – Kenedy – 16 points

A double that did for Mauricio Pellegrino and yo-yo’d Newcastle back up to mid table in this crazy relegation race. The Brazilian has been a regular starter since his loan move, will cost you only £4.7 million and is averaging 6 points a game. Newcastle have a double gameweek on the horizon and he must be a consideration for a bench boost squad.

Bargain of the week – Chris Wood – 15 points

Back after a long injury lay off and has 20 points in two weeks. However, both totals were amassed from substitute appearances and it’ll be tough to dislodge Ashley Barnes from the Burnley central striker role given the form that he is also in at the moment. Having said that Sean Dyche has brought Wood on in both matches to partner Barnes, so whose to say he wouldn’t consider starting them both.

Twat of the week – Jordan Ayew – -2 points

Now you’ve got to start searching for a new third striker. There aren’t many out there. Ayew was fulfilling that role quite nicely until the 10th minute of Swansea’s game against Huddersfield on Saturday. Imagine having him alongside Kane and Aguero for the weekend. Three players not even completing a half of football. Imagine.

Goal of the week – Jamie Vardy. 

Definite GOTS contender – 27s in.

 

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1  same Hornets
Andrew Wade
47 1465
2  same The winnings R mine
david bruce
54 1464
3  up Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
66 1463
4  up Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
65 1462
5  down Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
53 1460
6  up The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
76 1452
7  down The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
49 1443
8  same Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
54 1430
9  same Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
55 1430
10  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
39 1425
11  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
65 1425
12  same Queen of the north
DORINE REACHER
45 1401
13  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
71 1392
14  down Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
54 1389
15  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
56 1388
16  up It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
63 1387
17  down Rico united
JASON REACHER
50 1383
18  same Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
59 1376
19  same Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
56 1364
20  same We are Ayling
Paul Murray
60 1362
21  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
55 1352
22  down Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
54 1352
23  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
67 1343
24  up Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
73 1341
25  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
55 1339
26  down musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
50 1336
27  down Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
43 1335
28  up Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
65 1334
29  down Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
52 1333
30  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
45 1331
31  down King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
52 1331
32  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
57 1331
33  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
60 1314
34  down Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
48 1311
35  same Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
56 1309
36  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
60 1294
37  down blakes11
Steven Darling
63 1294
38  up To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
65 1260
39  down mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
42 1258
40  same cookster fc
Peter Cook
50 1246
41  up Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
68 1246
42  down FTM
Stu Smith
40 1241
43  down Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
44 1238
44  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
56 1227
45  same iamgroot
scott mcgow
59 1221
46  same Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
43 1204
47  up disco dancer
darren frankland
65 1188
48  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
39 1178
49  same Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
40 1151
50  same Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
48 1006

 

Manager of the month – The Winnings R Mine – David Bruce – 270 points (14 goals)

It was a close run thing for January Manager of the Month. The top four were separated by three points with The Winnings R Mine and Brexiter City both scoring 270 points and sharing first place. The Winnings R Mine take the prize, outscoring Brexiter by 14 goals to 11.

1  same The winnings R mine
david bruce
54 270
1  up Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
65 270
3  down blakes11
Steven Darling
63 268
4  up The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
76 267

Blakes11 triple captained in an attempt to pinch the award but just fell short. The Vinegar Pissers, despite winning manager of the week, will be cursing a Harry Kane captain choice – possibly not for the first time this season. Kane was outscored by seven other players in their line up – all of whom, as captain, would have given them the monthly award as well.

Manager of the week – The Vinegar Pissers – Paul Hawkins – 76 points

It was a week in which the top scoring teams – Liverpool and Manchester City – did as they were supposed to and registered comfortable wins against struggling teams with all of their star players chipping in with either an assist or goal. It definitely wasn’t a week for relying on the clean sheet experts – Manchester United or Chelsea – to do what they were supposed to and keep out Spurs and Bournemouth. That’s maybe slightly harsh on United, but the double whammy for Phil Jones owners – and there are a lot – is the minus score courtesy of and own goal and a booking. Chelsea have no excuse. But for David De Gea in goal, The Vinegar Pissers avoided the dodgy defensive displays and picked up a healthy 38 points from their Liverpool and City contingent.

Player of the week – Sam Clucas – 15 points

There’s a Swansea revival to take notice of. They’re suddenly the team offering the most tempting cheap players. Jordan Ayew is the form cheap striker scoring four in his last seven. In GW24 Federico Fernandez was the best bargain player and Alfie Mawson was only just pipped to the overall player award by one point. Sam Clucas takes that prize this week with two goals in their impressive win over Arsenal to follow up their similarly impressive, and unexpected, win over Liverpool last week.

Bargain of the week – Callum Wilson – 12 points

Every single stat surrounding the Chelsea v Bournemouth fixture pointed towards a comfortable home win. The last five games between the two have all resulted in a Chelsea victory by an aggregate score of 13-3. Add to the that the fact that Chelsea had kept six clean sheets in their previous eight games with Bournemouth only managing four all season. It’s the reason Marcos Alonso and Cesar Azpilicueta top the £7 million mark for defenders. This week they collected a solitary point each as Wilson netted his fourth in six games and second double figure score in three.

Twat of the week – Phil Jones – -2 points

Who else? The fifth most owned defender in the game drops a clanger. It’s a one off. He’s been the most consistent United defender and is the joint highest bonus scorer across the back line. Don’t be surprised if he picks up another nine point haul against Huddersfield at the weekend.

Goal of the week – Christian Eriksen. Bit of a dearth of quality this week. This for no other reason that it was scored in 10 seconds. You’d think the internet would have a video of that whole 10 seconds wouldn’t you? It doesn’t.

 

Gameweek 19 results

December 24, 2017

00–[

1  same Hornets
Andrew Wade
72 1129
2  up Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
100 1117
3  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
49 1090
4  down Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
68 1083
5  up Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
87 1069
6  same The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
81 1067
7  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
78 1063
8  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
69 1062
9  up Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
84 1059
10  same Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
73 1048
11  down Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
60 1041
12  up INIT FC
Mustafa khan
84 1037
13  up King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
80 1029
14  up Queen of the north
DORINE REACHER
83 1027
15  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
66 1023
16  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
56 1021
17  up We are Ayling
Paul Murray
83 1018
18  up Rico united
JASON REACHER
88 1018
19  same Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
71 1013
20  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
71 1013
21  up The winnings R mine
david bruce
85 1012
22  same Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
80 1011
23  down It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
65 1004
24  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
60 999
25  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
83 992
26  down Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
70 991
27  up musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
74 977
28  down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
72 975
29  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
97 971
30  up Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
82 970
31  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
82 969
32  down Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
55 960
33  up Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
76 957
34  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
64 956
35  up Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
98 955
36  down cookster fc
Peter Cook
56 954
37  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
54 947
38  up To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
88 945
39  down Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
64 937
40  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
84 934
41  same FTM
Stu Smith
77 934
42  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
73 928
43  down Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
51 918
44  down Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
42 903
45  down blakes11
Steven Darling
52 903
46  same Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
66 883
47  same mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
88 882
48  same iamgroot
scott mcgow
82 867
49  same disco dancer
darren frankland
67 835
50  same Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
37 736

 

Manager of the week – Andrew Swift – Gotta Light – 100 points

Hitting 100 points in a single gameweek in the middle of the rotation heavy Christmas period, without the use of a chip or a wildcard – and with two Stoke players in your team is some achievment. So kudos to Gotta Light whose century score was helped in no small part by Harry Kane, who had the audacity to score a hat trick against one of the tightest defences in the game. Their seven goals, with a penalty save thrown in for good measure, saw them leapfrog Greenyteamy and Despicable Mee into second place and within 12 points of Hornets who have the Christmas number 1 slot.

Player of the week – Harry Kane – 17 points

What a troll. Not only defying the 120,000 or so players who had decided enough was enough probably for the third or fourth time and got rid, but also banging in the hat trick against everyone’s favourite defence to become the first double player of the week. Complete bastard.

Bargain of  the week – Christian Atsu – 15 points

Newcastle have only mustered one other double figure score between the team since the early weeks of the season – after a sequence of results that had seen them creep into fourth in the table. There’s been a lot of pack shuffling by Rafael Benitez, although Atsu has been as ever present as anyone, around a brief injury lay off. He and Matt Ritchie are their highest scorers suggesting their wide attackers are the ones to take notice of if you ever fancied investing in them.

Twat of the week – Daniel Amartey – -2 points

17 minutes. 2 yellow cards.

Goal of the week – Jordan Ayew. From 52s.

 

 

 

 

 

Gameweek 1 results

August 11, 2015

1 greensmeansbusiness adam greenwood 57 57
2 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 52 52
3 4 Lime Jellies Ian Williams 51 51
4 Golden Boys Stephanie Cripps 44 44
4 scotty2hotty scott mcgow 44 44
4 Walking with Memphis Noel Driver 44 44
7 FC Caligula Ajay Supeda 43 43
7 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 43 43
9 Sweet Cherry Pie Jason Earwicker 42 42
10 Gaalacticos Colin Goulding 41 41
11 JonniestaRedmondinho David Spinks 40 40
12 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 39 39
13 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 38 38
13 Grievous AngelRangel Andrew Swift 38 38
15 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 37 37
15 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 37 37
15 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 37 37
18 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 36 36
18 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 36 36
18 What’s Up????? DEAN CRIPPS 36 36
21 SS3 FC Paul Murray 35 35
21 Bicuitmen Chris Morton 35 35
21 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 35 35
24 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 34 34
24 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 34 34
26 Atlético Chappers Richard Chapman 33 33
26 Below Par Paul Bentz 33 33
26 REAL JORVIK Simon Brown 33 33
26 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 33 33
30 Ciderheads Darren Pope 32 32
30 Init fc Mustafa khan 32 32
32 Baker Bum Boys Lewis Baker 30 30
33 RICO UNITED JASON REACHER 29 29
33 The Hardy Boys Alan Hardy 29 29
33 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 29 29
36 Howayman Mark Bromham 26 26
36 Romeo’s Honda Van Rob Hewer 26 26
38 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 25 25
39 The Craggy Islanders Adrian Roche 23 23
40 BrussiaHairbach Alex Ritchie 22 22
41 Go Buffoons Go!!! Jitesh Lakhani 21 21
42 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 19 19
43 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 11 11

Nice to see the Premier League is as predictable as ever. Arsenal second bottom. Leicester, Palace, West Ham and Villa occupying the European places. Long may it continue. Although it won’t will it? It’s the first week. No-one knows what’s about to happen. No amount of fantasy pre-planning would have envisaged Arsenal conceding two and scoring zero against the Hammers. Only five teams managed a clean sheet. It wasn’t a weekend for the defence. Thank goodness for Man City who posted the most convincing result. Their 3-0 defeat of West Brom established them at the top of the league, and gives Yaya Toure the first player of the week award. He and Vincent Kompany had sluggish seasons last time out, but their double figure scores for this week might get a few more managers interested in them again.

So – plenty of points to be had among the goal scorers and assist makers – but, only if you’d taken some wild-ish punts on the mid price market. Aside from Toure, the most expensive player occupying that first page of high scores is Philippe Coutinho at £8 million. Next highest scorers of the week Riyad Mahrez and Marc Albrighton won’t set you back any more than £5.5 million. Highest scoring striker Arouna Kone is a £5 million player and £4.5 million Liverpool youngster Joe Gomez posted the second best score for a defender behind Kompany.

A good selection of the lesser known new signings made their mark. As well as Gomez, Jordan Amavi and Rudy Gestede had promising debuts for Villa. As did Andre Ayew for Swansea, Dimitri Payet for West Ham and Georginio Wijnaldum for Newcastle. All should have slipped onto a few managers’ radars. Slipping off may be Petr Cech, who clearly thinks he’s still playing for Chelsea.

As things stood on Saturday night we had a Leicester fan sat at the top of the Bucket with a Sunderland fan at the bottom – which felt right. Apologies if anyone was led down a Mackem based garden path based on what I’d written in the first blog post. It was a double whammy of sorts for the Mindless Morons who didn’t even have any Sunderland players in their team, yet still propped everybody else up. They were one of many to invest in Thibaut Courtois. Pretty Schitty City stayed loyal to Mahrez and Jamie Vardy, and they returned 25 points. But its league newcomer, greensmeansbusiness, who leads the way and gets our first manager of the week award. Their 57 points came courtesy of a canny (or was it accidental?) use of their bench boost chip. An extra 13 points was added to their total courtesy of scoring performances by Jason Puncheon and Steven Fletcher.

Player of the week – Yaya Toure – 16 points. Making City the early pacesetters.

Bargains of the week – Marc Albrighton – 15 points. Ended last season strongly too.

Donkey of the week – Thibaut Courtois – -2 points. A chance for Asmir Begovic?

Goal of the week – Philippe Coutinho. Because it appears overhead kicks have been banned.

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