Gameweek 24 and January Manager of the Month results

The week (or fortnight) in which it all changed. Liverpool’s double gameweek. Probably not their last of the season but that didn’t stop the majority of us and the rest of the world jumping on the prospect of some massive scores from the runaway Premier League leaders, particularly in their match against West Ham. Some major transfer activity ensued. Can we squeeze in three Reds players? It was a move made easier by timely injuries to Jamie Vardy and Marcus Rashford. And then the triple captains started landing. You had a choice, depending on the make up of your team and your propensity for a bit of gambling, of sticking it on one of six players – two obvious and four hipster. There shouldn’t have been a massive amount of difference between picking Mo Salah and Sadio Mane. Stats would suggest that both would return something. Roberto Firmino carried slightly more risk, but this is the guy that only scores in away games. He could be the key to a sneaky rank rise if the majority banked on the other two. Or dare you captain a defender? TAA, Robertson and Van Dijk are virtual ever-presents in the middle of an astounding run of clean-sheet shenanigans. Add to that the full-backs’ assist potential.

270,000 managers compared to 220,000 opted for Mane over Salah as their triple captain. The split in the top 100 was 40 to 39 in favour of the Senegalese. Over a million compared to 940,000 went with the standard captain choice on Mane. Selecting Sadio Mane WAS NOT A BAD IDEA. Keep telling yourself that. In the end the best choice was Jordan Henderson, who equaled Salah’s score, but at well under half the price. 

So, selecting Salah would have got you 48 points to Mane’s 3, and it’s pretty easy, scanning the Buckets league to pick out those that went with the former over the latter. That 45 point difference is evident in a lot of scores. Most notably, right at the top. We have new leaders, and instantly by some distance. Game Of Stones got it right. Locky Bauer Bowyer did not.

Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
Stephen Papadopoulos
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
Sterling Silva
Tim Dodd
Micheal Dinneen

Considering what was expected of the week, the scores were, on the whole, a bit underwhelming. The average was a disappointing 55 points. But for the Liverpool v West Ham game, in which Salah’s haul and the clean sheet justified the non-Mane captainers selections, the rest of the week was pretty soul-destroying. Southampton and Burnley returned unexpected clean sheets, Everton lost one in the final minute to a Florian Lejeune double. I mean, we all saw that one coming didn’t we? There was a Leicester goal blitz but with no involvement from either Vardy or Maddison – and then they conceded. Most teams are littered with one and two point hauls plus whatever Liverpool returns you managed.

Our top scorers were FTM and Chef Utd. Both hit 89 points. FTM win the place on the honours board courtesy of the four goals they scored to Chef Utd’s two. To contradict everything I’ve just said about the gameweek, they only relied on two Liverpool assets and got pretty good returns out of the rest of their squad. They could even afford to have a 10 point Jorginho haul sat on their bench. They become the first three-time manager of the week winners this season.

Manager of the month went to The Craggy Islanders. Despite the contrasting scores and fortunes of a lot of teams in the league, the standings didn’t alter much from last week to this. Most of those in contention posted scores in the 70s and 80s, suggesting they all got their double gameweek picks just about right. The Islanders triple captained Salah.

The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
Alisson Wonderland
Scott Denyer
Tim Dodd
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
Stephen Papadopoulos
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton

The Buckets Cup starts next gameweek. So if you’re cursing your Mane luck, put that behind you and focus on the cup. To confirm, the three teams with a bye to the second round are The Craggy Islanders, as last years winners, and Cook Pass Babtridge and Locky Bauer Bowyer as the two highest weekly scores so far this season. Check the cup link for the draw. Also, it’s worth mentioning that the Last Man Standing competition is now past half way. We have 30 teams left. Nine of our current top ten remain, with Edgbaston being a casualty in GW18. Ren n White, currently in 59th place, are the lowest team still (just about) standing. Check that link to see if you’re still there. 


January manager of the month – Adrian Roche – The Craggy Islanders – 271 points

Manager of the week – Stu Smith – FTM – 89 points (4 goals)

Player of the week – Jordan Henderson – Liverpool – 16 points

Bargain of the week – Florian Lejeune – Newcastle United – 14 points

Twat of the week – David Luiz – Arsenal – -3 points

Goal of the week – Jay Rodriguez

Gameweek 10 results and October Manager of the Month

Another week, another leader. Locky Bauer Bowyer had already taken over by the time Leicester’s 9th goal had gone in, accumulating 48 points from just that one game. By contrast Genial Plodders finished Friday evening on a score of -1. They’ll be glad they only had Jannik Vestergaard and not Ryan Bertrand, who finished on a record low total of -6. Locky’s weren’t the only to benefit from the 9-0. Virtually everyone with a green arrow against their name had some Leicester influence in their team. I’m not sure any of us had a triple up. Plenty of us captained Vardy and there were a few more of us with Vardy and one other – Chilwell, Soyuncu, Maddison, Tielemans and Evans being the most popular.

Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
78 589
Sterling Silva
61 586
Noel Driver
71 578
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
83 572
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
53 566
Stephen Papadopoulos
74 564
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
67 563
Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
67 560
musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
43 559
Chef Utd
Robert Frost
57 559

It was a good week for the other City too. As well as benefitting from the Leicester madness, many of us complimented that with (at last) a fruitful captain pick from the Etihad. Both Kevin De Bruyne and Raheem Sterling, the two most popular armband choices, returned attacking contributions. The Leicester/Manchester combination came through for Pretty Schitty City, our October Manager of the Month. City got over the line thanks to a 60 point contribution from Ederson, Sterling and captain Vardy. Although there was more bad luck for those convinced that Sergio Aguero would pick up his regular home points haul. He missed out again in favour of Gabriel Jesus and salt was well and truly rubbed in with a 10 minute, 1 point cameo.

Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
79 178
Cookie fc
Peter Cook
82 168
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
78 166
king ragg
Steven Darling
65 163
Noel Driver
71 160


October manager of the month – Pretty Schitty City – Alex Michaluk – 178 points

Manager of the week – Basham’s Arriving – Tim Dodd – 84 points

Player of the week – Ayoze Perez – Leicester City – 20 points

Bargain of the week – Tim Krul – Norwich City – 16 points

Twat of the week – Ryan Bertrand – Southampton – -6 points

Goal of the week – Jay Rodriguez. 1m26s


Gameweek 17 results

same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
53 971
same Yeboah’s Right Foot
Paul Murray
64 965
up Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
56 930
down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
42 923
up Uriah Rennie 2nd XI
Neil Greenwood
68 905
down Hedgehog Corpse FC
Nick Smith
36 905
down Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
39 897
up When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
46 896
up Cooksters
Peter Cook
59 893
10  down 4 Fuchs Ake
Jason Earwicker
36 893
11  up greenyteamy
adam greenwood
67 891
12  up INIT FC
Mustafa khan
50 886
30 882
14  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
43 881
15  down 30:19
Darren Lavelle
41 880
16  up Go Buffoons Go
Jitesh Lakhani
55 876
17  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
58 866
18  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
45 861
19  down To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
36 858
20  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
44 851
21  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
41 850
22  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
43 846
23  down RICO UNITED
37 845
24  up Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
63 841
25  up Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
43 830
26  down Joey Bosa
Paul Bentz
31 829
27  down nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
46 827
28  same Jeff Lamp’s Porsche
David Spinks
38 824
29  down Jarvis FC
Matt Jarvis
33 821
30  same Crazy Legs XI
David Caldicott
50 820
31  same Ciderheads
Darren Pope
47 819
32  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
52 807
33  up Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
49 800
34  down FTM
Stu Smith
37 795
35  same RG XV
Ryan Garoghan
40 792
36  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
38 790
37  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
43 782
38  same I am not Zlatan
Colin Goulding
57 782
39  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
62 774
40  down Pepe Le Blue
41 767
41  up Big White Chiefs
david frankland
57 760
42  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
41 759
43  down jetty city
scott mcgow
33 749
44  down Have a little dink
Ian Williams
33 749
45  same Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
50 740
46  up bazza 28 united
laura barrett
45 719
47  down Bermie Utd
Glen Davies
30 707
48  up DJ’s Trail Blazers
Danian Jones
63 707
49  down Racing Club Skegness
Andrew Swift
26 700
50  up Dj daz
darren frankland
73 690
51  down Bish Bosh Goal
Simon Purnell
38 675
52  down Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
39 671
53  down Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
35 661


Congratulations to DJ Daz who finally poked their head over the precipice of our accidental relegation zone and made it on to page 1. They collected 73 points, the highest total of the weekend. It was an impressive score too, with most of the rest of the league finishing with scores in and around the 40’s and 50’s. Their defence picked up 30 points, as did their trio of Chelsea players. Good old Diego Costa came through as captain, despite finally picking up that fifth booking. He got his usual goal and a solitary bonus mark to boost his captain total to 12. And he gets Christmas off. He probably deserves it.

Second highest score came from Uriah’s. They were probably the team to suffer most at the hands of Sergio Aguero’s sending off a few weeks ago, dropping from 1st to 12th as a result. They’ve clawed their way back up to 5th off the back of a 68 point score this week. They’re still 60 odd points off the lead. There’s a spread developing at the top of the table and our top two, The Craggy Islanders and Yeboah’s Right Foot, are gradually opening up a lead on the rest of us.


Player of the weekend – Patrick Van Aanholt – 15 points. Good goal too.

Bargain of the weekend – Daniel Amartey – 10 points. Rescuing Leicester….

Donkey of the week – Jamie Vardy – -2 points – …from this loon.

Goal of the week – Jay Rodriguez. Another likely GOTS contender.

Gameweek 18 results

1 Sportingoffensivewig Alex Ritchie 37 1,113
2 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 46 1,103
3 Ciderheads Darren Pope 32 1,092
4 Romeo’s-honda-van Rob Hewer 33 1,092
5 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 27 1,078
6 NaboombuDirtyYellows Andrew Swift 66 1,069
7 Crazylegs Xi David Caldicott 26 1,067
8 {Your Ad Here} Matthew Hopkins 35 1,065
9 The Magico Rob Buttaci 41 1,059
10 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 31 1,056
11 Upper Bullens Scouse Mouse 57 1,029
12 Shakin’ Stephens P Hawkins 41 1,028
13 Rien Toulouse Colin Goulding 42 1,020
14 Kedah FA David Spinks 52 1,008
15 Have a little dink Ian Williams 32 993
16 Mid-Season Blip Paul Bentz 36 985
17 pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 39 979
18 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 42 971
19 Release the Hounds Paul Mitchell 30 970
20 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 42 928
21 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 39 909
22 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 39 902
23 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 36 886
24 Biscuitmen Chris Morton 43 854
25 Real Jorvik Simon Brown 59 828
26 Inter Minan Jordan Raper 43 800

NaboombuDirtyYellows are the big movers of the gameweek, top scoring with 66 points, and climbing from 10th up to 6th. They’ve been steadily on the rise for the last couple of weeks, and have also hit the top in the race for the December Manager of the Month prize. Have a look…

1 NaboombuDirtyYellows Andrew Swift 66 369
2 Romeo’s-honda-van Rob Hewer 33 366
3 Ciderheads Darren Pope 32 365
4 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 31 352
5 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 27 349
6 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 46 348
7 {Your Ad Here} Matthew Hopkins 35 347
8 Rien Toulouse Colin Goulding 42 342

NDY’s opted for Wayne Rooney as their captain this week. A calculated risk, as Suarez had his week off. The majority of Buckets managers stuck with Suarez, and the difference in scores is easy to see. All those who didn’t dare make the switch landed in and around the 30-40 point bracket. Kedah FA and Upper Bullens were two of the other three teams to score 50+. They went with Rooney and Hazard as captain. Suarez also got himself booked.

It was a week in which plenty of goals were scored, so there were points to be gained. Notably Theo Walcott and Lucas Podolski’s contribution to Arsenal’s victory at West Ham. Podolski made his first appearance since August as a second half substitute, and his 26 minutes on the pitch was enough time for him to score and assist Arsenal’s final two goals. Theo Walcott, himself recently back from a long term lay-off picked up 15 points, scoring two of the goals and getting full bonus marks. Here we have two players probably not in too many teams at the moment, but likely to transferred in on the back of these performances. Their returns have come at a good time for Arsenal with that nasty winter fixture pile up, a misfiring Olivier Giroud, and an injured Aaron Ramsey.

Player of the week – Jay Rodriguez – 16 points. Saints back to winning ways and his fifth in six games. Still only 6 million.

Bargain of the week – Scott Parker – 14 points. Great goal too.

Donkey of the week – Marc Wilson – -4 points. Off, then watched as his side conceded five.

Goal of the week – Dwight Gayle. Last minute. Top corner. Out the bottom three.

Gameweek 10 results

Sportingoffensivewig  Alex Ritchie  81  624

Crazylegs Xi  David Caldicott  50  571

{Your Ad Here}   Matthew Hopkins  50  556

The Magico   Rob Buttaci  58  554

Panza Grande XI  Stuart Baker  55  553

Neil Madrid Neil Strong  66  551

Shakin’ Stephens P Hawkins  39  549

Rip Roaring Reds  Sean Whyton  56  543

Uriah Rennie 2nd XI  Neil Greenwood  71  542

10 Bermie Utd  Glen Davies  62  535

11 Kedah FA  David Spinks  78  534

12 Upper Bullens  Scouse Mouse  65  532

13 Romeo’s-honda-van  Rob Hewer  49  529

14 Have a little dink  Ian Williams  95  522

15 Ciderheads  Darren Pope  54  521

16 Mid-Season Blip  Paul Bentz  53  520

17 NaboombuDirtyYellows  Andrew Swift  55  515

18 pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk  62  510

19 Hedgehog Corpse FC  Nick Smith  38  504

20 Release the Hounds  Paul Mitchell  61  500

21 Real Jorvik  Simon Brown  42  496

22 Rien Toulouse  Colin Goulding  62  494

23 Shoelace Untied  Caroline Strong  70  482

24 The Mindless Morons  John Seacroft  41  477

25 Inter Minan  Jordan Raper  35  437

26 Biscuitmen  Chris Morton  50  437


Have A Little Dink score a massive 95 points and are the team of the week. This is only 2 points short of the current best weekly score of 97 held by Neil Madrid. It’s a valiant effort given that Neil Madrid’s score came during a double gameweek. This 95 point haul came with each team just playing once. Of course, it helps when one team hits seven goals, you make the player of the week your captain and your goalkeeper scores. That player of the week is Sergio Aguero. I predict a lot of frantic forward line changing in the coming weeks to accommodate Aguero who has scored 62 points in the last six weeks. They were also helped by the usual contributon from Yaya Toure and Aaron Ramsey (like everybody else – no advantage there), but also by Steven Caulker. The Cardiff defender scored, picked up all three bonus points and kept a clean sheet in the first Premiership South Wales derby. That’s Caulker’s second consecutive three point bonus, and Cardiff’s second consecutive clean sheet. It’s Caulker’s second goal of the season. He could be one to watch in coming weeks. Have a Little Dink have made some good ground with this score, moving to within 30 points of the top six.

Sportingoffensivewig strengthen their position at the top of the table, now stretching their lead to 53 points. They posted another impressive weekly total of 81 points. City’s 7-0 hammering of Norwich offered a lot of points to those teams with three City players. The highest scoring of which were Aguero, Nasatasic, Toure and Silva. Sporting had Aguero as captain (as they have done since the start) – alongside Silva and Toure.

Stoke worked out how to score past Southampton this week. A 98 yard punt in the first 15 seconds by the goalkeeper. And with it, Asmir Begovic becomes Stoke’s joint leading scorer. Briefly back to Norwich’s 7-0 hammering at the hands of Manchester City. Ordinarily letting in seven automatically puts you in pole position for the donkey award. Not this week. The Norwich defence can thank Lee Cattermole and Andrea Dossena of Sunderland, who were both sent off against Hull. Cattermole’s red card might have been a little harsh. Nine times out of ten referees see Lee Cattermole flying across the floor and have the red of their pocket before he’s made contact. Dossena, on the other hand….?! So much for that morale boosting victory over Newcastle last weekend. Dossena and Cattermole’s tackles were on ex Sunderland players. Hull are managed by an ex Sunderland manager. Hull’s goal was an own goal. Sunderland effectively played Sunderland – and got beat. Well done Sunderland.


Player of the week – Sergio Aguero – 18 points. His value is rising by the second. Looks a good bet to be the season’s highest scorer.

Bargain of the week – Jay Rodriguez – 9 points. Still only one defeat for Southampton.

Donkey of the week – Andrea Dossena – -2 points. Shouldn’t be allowed back on the pitch this season.

Goal of the week – Aaron Ramsey. Drug test him NOW!