1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
54 1750
2  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
66 1748
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
78 1738
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
65 1699
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
63 1681
6  up INIT FC
Mustafa khan
71 1647
7  same FTM
Stu Smith
58 1641
8  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
46 1639
9  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
43 1600
10  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
64 1600
11  down King raggg
Steven Darling
37 1590
12  down Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
41 1588
13  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
50 1588
14  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
62 1579
15  down Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
39 1560
16  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
63 1557
17  up Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
49 1552
18  down Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
46 1551
19  up RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
73 1549
20  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
47 1541
21  down Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
43 1538
22  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
46 1524
23  same Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
57 1523
24  same Cookie fc
Peter Cook
50 1510
25  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
79 1503
26  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
38 1496
27  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
46 1489
28  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
60 1479
29  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
50 1470
30  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
50 1470
31  down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
48 1470
32  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
53 1469
33  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
52 1468
34  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
49 1462
35  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
70 1460
36  up QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
84 1456
37  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
44 1456
38  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
43 1454
39  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
54 1445
40  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
35 1440
41  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
37 1429
42  same Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
58 1423
43  down ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
38 1419
44  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
58 1405
45  up Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
67 1397
46  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
28 1394
47  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
69 1383
48  same Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
53 1327
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
51 1295
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
62 1241

 

Top of the league – But Da Pitch Ain’t 1 – Trev Reams – 1750 points

Da Pitch still hold the lead, but it’s only a slender two points over the surging Craggy Islanders who are on the hunt for the second title. Perfidious sit third and only ten points further back after a resurgent week, and although not completely out of touch and out of contention for the title, Neil Madrid and Bielsa Ringing will need near perfect run-ins to catch those sides ahead of them. And we probably shouldn’t rule out the possibility of INIT, FTM or Shoelace sneaking into fourth place. We’re entering silly season, as the blank and double gameweeks begin to form and chip tactics come into play. We’re faced with only five fixtures in GW31 and the likelihood of a similar figure in GW33, depending on the outcome of the next round of the FA Cup. Already Manchester United have had two of their fixtures rearranged and moved to the middle of gameweeks 32 and 35. Expect the other successful cup teams to see their fixtures moved to the same midweek slots. Of the leading contenders, The Craggy Islanders, Perfidious Albion, Neil Madrid and Bielsa Ringing have all of their chips and their wildcard remaining. Da Pitch just have their chips to play. FTM Have their wildcard but bench-boosted in GW10, whereas INIT have no wildcards or triple captain and Shoelace have no wildcards or free hit. Negotiating the next few weeks could be tricky without at least one of the wildcard or free hit still in the bag. And it shouldn’t all be about the leaders, as a perfectly played strategy of wildcards and chips could hand any team anywhere in the league any of the next three manager of the month awards. It might also be something the semi-finalists of the Buckets Cup want to consider…

Buckets Cup quarter finals

Although maybe not in the case of The Craggy Islanders or Neil Madrid who probably have their eyes on a bigger prize. And that may play into the hands of Fake Madrid and Kebab Eaters who are the other two teams to progress to the last four. The Islanders beat Da Pitch as Madrid saw off FTM in the two top ten clashes. The Islanders will play Fake Madrid, who beat El Loco No Joko, who inexplicably kept Virgil Van Dyk and Sergio Aguero on the bench?!?!?!? Kebab Eaters edged past Mour Salt and Pep to face Neil Madrid. It could be a Madrid derby final.

February manager of the month – Atletico Chappers – Richard Chapman – 309 points

Thanks to their top 2,000 in the world weekly score of GW27 and consolidating with a steady 50 pointer this week, Chappers pinch the February prize. I’m not sure they were really in it at all before hitting the dizzy heights at the weekend. They have Gerard Deulefeu to thank and did so by benching him for their hammering at the hands of Liverpool last night.

Manager of the week – Queen Of The North – Dorine Reacher – 84 points

A week for defenders this week and QOTN lined up two of the big scorers – Schar and Robertson – in their team. They amassed 43 points from those two and their other defender, Ashley Young, who chipped in with a goal, and their keeper, Allison. They wouldn’t be picking up this award however had it not been for a Marko Arnautovic no-show. Although quite what Sadio Mane was doing warming the bench is anyone’s guess given his present run of form of six goals in six games.

Player of the week – Virgil Van Dyk – Liverpool – 20 points

It would have been 51 points had Van Dyk been lined alongside them in a triple up Liverpool defence. It’s not a ludicrous idea given that they’re three of the six highest scoring defenders in the game and that Liverpool have more clean sheets than anyone else so far this season. They could surpass 20 which would be a great achievement. It bodes well for the weeks ahead in which Liverpool play every week. They have no doubles, but they also have no blanks.

Bargain of the week – Fabian Schar – Newcastle United – 15 points

There aren’t many players with two weekly player awards so far this season. Fabian Schar is probably the most unexpected recipient. A clean sheet and a wondergoal always equals top bonus. Newcastle will play the blank gameweek in 31, and have other potential clean sheet matches between now and then.

Twat of the week – Kieran Trippier – Tottenham Hotspur – -1 points

A wonderful own goal that totally wrong footed Hugo Lloris, a World Cup winning captain no less. Tottenham’s meltdown might have started a few weeks earlier this season.

Goal of the week – Fabian Schar.

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Gameweek 27 results

February 25, 2019

1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
30 1696
2  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
52 1682
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
36 1660
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
37 1634
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
61 1622
6  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
43 1593
7  up FTM
Stu Smith
46 1583
8  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
30 1576
9  up Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
36 1557
10  up King raggg
Steven Darling
47 1557
11  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
41 1547
12  up Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
38 1538
13  same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
34 1536
14  up Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
31 1521
15  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
62 1517
16  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
25 1506
17  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
45 1505
18  same Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
45 1503
19  up Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
41 1495
20  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
36 1494
21  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
32 1478
22  up RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
48 1476
23  up Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
33 1466
24  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
25 1460
25  same Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
28 1458
26  up Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
41 1443
27  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
32 1424
28  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
49 1422
29  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
44 1420
30  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
86 1420
31  down Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
37 1419
32  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
36 1416
33  same The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
42 1416
34  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
48 1413
35  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
39 1412
36  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
44 1411
37  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
50 1405
38  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
28 1395
39  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
41 1392
40  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
37 1390
41  down ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
38 1381
42  up Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
45 1373
43  up QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
46 1372
44  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
29 1366
45  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
40 1347
46  up Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
66 1330
47  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
41 1318
48  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
32 1274
49  up The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
31 1244
50  up Ross’s champions
darren frankland
38 1191

 

Buckets Cup 2nd round

It was a low scoring week all round and there wasn’t much to choose between any of the second round ties as a result. We had our first count back to decide a game. INIT and Da Pitch couldn’t be separated by goals, bonus or assists, so in a rule I just made up this afternoon Da Pitch progress due to scoring more points in the last round. Sorry INIT – unless you were willing to meet and fight then I figured this was the fairest way of doing things. Da Pitch advancing sets up a juicy looking quarter final match up against the Craggy Islanders who are hot their opponent’s heels at the top of the league table. We’ve also seen our first score to nil in the Buckets Cup. Thelma And Luiz, it seems, are no more. They’ve disappeared from the league and so Neil Madrid progress with the lowest winning score of the round.

Manager of the week – Atletico Chappers – Richard Chapman – 86 points

The worldwide average was only 35 points this week – a score that most Buckets teams hovered in and around. Atletico Chappers’ 86 point haul is twice as many as most other teams in the league and sees them climb 12 places into 30th – a (possibly) unprecedented leap at this stage of the season. Chappers brought in Gerard Deulefeu last week, obviously in anticipation of him posting the highest individual score of the season thus far, with his hat trick, assist and big bonus contribution for Watford against Cardiff. It’s not like there weren’t goals around this week. Six goals and four clean sheets in a week in which saw an average of three goals a game isn’t totally out of the ordinary. There were just too many blanks from the game’s elite bunch.

Player of the week – Gerard Deulefeu – Watford – 23 points

He’s literally done nothing for eight gameweeks. From what I can see, only two Buckets teams had him. You can probably pick them out. Apparently three players in the whole of the game had the gumption to triple captain him. Sometimes mad people are lucky.

Bargain of the week – Troy Deeney – Watford – 15 points

Unsurprisingly the other must-have player came from the same game. Deeney hasn’t done anything for seven gameweeks since his brace against Bournemouth. Only one Buckets team had him from what I can see. It’s not either of the teams with Deulefeu, so you should be able to work out which one that is as well.

Twat of the week – Tommy Smith – Huddersfield – -3 points

I’m running out of disparaging things to write about Huddersfield twats. Sent off in the 23rd minute. I imagine there weren’t too many managers suffering as a result of this. Does anyone own a Huddersfield defender anyway?

Goal of the week – No idea, was there one?

Gameweek 19 results

December 28, 2018

1  up Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
66 1185
2  up But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
81 1178
3  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
72 1171
4  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
49 1171
5  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
75 1131
6  down Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
60 1127
7  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
78 1125
8  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
56 1119
9  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
54 1118
10  same Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
72 1114
11  same FTM
Stu Smith
73 1105
12  same King raggg
Steven Darling
67 1096
13  up SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
70 1095
14  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
64 1091
15  up INIT FC
Mustafa khan
95 1076
16  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
76 1069
17  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
49 1057
18  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
66 1056
19  same Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
67 1046
20  up Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
71 1038
21  down RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
56 1034
22  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
66 1025
23  same Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
62 1021
24  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
70 1017
25  up Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
79 1015
25  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
81 1015
27  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
46 1013
28  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
59 1012
29  up Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
82 1010
30  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
81 1009
31  up PenshawPerformers
david bruce
73 1007
32  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
61 1006
33  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
66 1002
34  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
54 999
35  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
59 999
36  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
68 987
37  up El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
63 977
38  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
64 970
39  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
40 969
40  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
44 967
41  up ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
63 964
42  down The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
52 956
43  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
60 946
44  same Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
47 932
45  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
53 929
46  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
77 912
47  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
79 897
48  down Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
62 895
49  down Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
60 889
50  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
57 876
51  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
54 808

 

Manager of the week – INIT FC – Mustafa Khan – 95 points

December’s not an easy month to negotiate but it helps when you’ve got goals galore. There were 34 last week and there were 32 in this. There were plenty of braces – Init had Felipe Anderson and Eden Hazard – and only four teams kept clean sheets. Among them Liverpool and Palace, who contributed a healthy 19 points. TAA and AWB got a bonus point for every surname – TAA added an assist. The December monthly total is always the biggest of the season and here’s how the current table looks…

1  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
78 335
2  down Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
60 325
3  up Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
79 316
4  down Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
66 316
4  up Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
71 316
6  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
72 309
7  up Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
82 307
8  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
64 306
9  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
56 304
10  same King raggg
Steven Darling
67 302
11  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
75 301
12  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
81 300

 

Player of the week – Kyle Walker-Peters – Tottenham Hotspur – 18 points

Tottenham also picked up a clean sheet and another double barreled wing back stole the show with three assists, more than most regular wingers manage in a season. He added a bonus mark for each surname and his christian name.

Bargain of the week – Marc Albrighton – Leicester City – 10 points

Leicester slightly sent the fanatsy world into disarray with their victory over Chelsea last gameweek. Beating City has completely thrown a spanner in the works. And to think they were allegedly considering giving their manager the boot. Albrighton hardly sets the FPL world alight, even when his team wins the league, but his headed goal and top bonus marks will have a lot of City-centric managers scratching their heads for a few days.

Twat of the week – Fabian Delph – Manchester City – -2 points

..and to compound their misery.

Goal of the week – Paul Pogba. At 6m21s

A preamble. We’ve still not had the Manchester United v Bournemouth game. The most disorganised club in Europe it appears have left everyone hanging. Places are still to be settled at the top of the Buckets table. I suppose it’s exciting, although I don’t think there’s anything that can stop Caligula being crowned champions. They’re awaiting a score for Chris Smalling as well as a point from Aaron Cresswell who will replace Dimitri Payet once substitutions are activated.

The Kolarov Mane have climbed into second but can’t go any higher. Your Ad Here are 14 points further back with Simon Francis on the bench. Unless the Bournemouth captain gets in among the goals and keeps a clean sheet on Tuesday night, third is as high as they can hope for. That seems pretty much nailed on as Edgbaston are 25 points further back and with only Manuel Lanzini to come in after substitutions and David De Gea to play.

There is a battle for fourth. Shoelace sit in fifth, three points behind Edgbaston with Chris Smalling and Anthony Martial to play. A goal for either of those should be enough, providing of course they stay on the pitch. Or even get on the pitch in the first place. Might Van Gaal rest players now?

Unfortunately for Rocky Ba Bauer, now in 6th, it appears to be out of reach.

If Edgbaston lose the fourth place spot, they may have the May manager of the month award to fall back on. They currently lead Init FC by nine points. Init probably need Chris Smalling to score to overhaul the lead. Walking With Memphis, however, three points further back, and 12 behind Edgbaston, have Smalling, Antonio Valencia and Anthony Martial to play. LVG playing the kids might be the only thing that keeps Memphis (and Shoelace) from toppling Edgbaston.

Full weekly round up will arrive sometime Wednesday I expect.

 

Gameweek 37 results

May 12, 2016

1 FC Caligula Ajay Supeda 84 2,217
2 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 76 2,201
3 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 69 2,177
4 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 69 2,158
5 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 50 2,156
6 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 114 2,146
7 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 93 2,120
8 Golden Boys Stephanie Cripps 61 2,117
9 Init fc Mustafa khan 110 2,092
10 Walking with Memphis Noel Driver 99 2,070
11 Atlético Chappers Richard Chapman 68 2,069
12 JonniestaRedmondinho David Spinks 97 2,051
13 Sergio Five O DEAN CRIPPS 41 2,046
14 Bicuitmen Chris Morton 65 2,039
15 4 Lime Jellies Ian Williams 59 2,035
16 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 95 2,027
17 Howayman Mark Bromham 66 2,014
18 SS3 FC Paul Murray 47 2,011
19 scotty2hotty scott mcgow 55 2,007
20 The Craggy Islanders Adrian Roche 80 2,005
21 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 80 2,002
22 Gaalacticos Colin Goulding 80 1,987
23 Grievous AngelRangel Andrew Swift 62 1,979
24 Romeo’s Honda Van Rob Hewer 62 1,975
25 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 41 1,967
26 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 86 1,963
27 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 52 1,951
28 Below Par Paul Bentz 53 1,913
29 greensmeansbusiness adam greenwood 52 1,912
30 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 88 1,910
31 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 50 1,907
32 RICO UNITED JASON REACHER 79 1,882
33 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 69 1,876
34 The Hardy Boys Alan Hardy 56 1,860
35 Sweet Cherry Pie Jason Earwicker 72 1,849
36 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 63 1,834
37 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 44 1,825
38 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 92 1,765
39 Go Buffoons Go!!! Jitesh Lakhani 71 1,762
40 Baker Bum Boys Lewis Baker 52 1,754
41 Ciderheads Darren Pope 58 1,727
42 Bish Bosh Goal Simon Purnell 47 1,547
43 REAL JORVIK Simon Brown 32 1,508
44 BrussiaHairbach Alex Ritchie 51 1,401

 

There were more goals scored in this gameweek than there were in the other monster double gameweek of a few weeks ago but Buckets totals weren’t as high. Probably due to the fact that the highest scoring players of the week came from Norwich and Sunderland, and not from West Ham and Manchester United, as I think most people expected. The popular choices for (triple) captain seemed to be Dimitri Payet and Anthony Martial. They didn’t disappoint necessarily, but a punt on Lamine Kone – and it would have been one hell of a punt – would have bagged you a potential 63 points.

Still, we had some 100+ scores. Kudos to Init FC and Edgbaston with 110 and a week winning 114 points respectively. Edgbaston triple captained Jermain Defoe, and picked up another 18 points from Patrick Van Aanholt, capitalising on Sunderland’s dominant week. Seven other double gameweekers and useful single game scores from Kevin De Bruyne and Sergio Aguero did the trick .

Init bench boosted to good effect, picking up an extra 23 points. Their choice of captain let them down. Andy Carroll only contributed six points. They also had Defoe and Van Aanholt. A captaincy punt on either of them would have made them clear weekly winners.

…And put them in pole position for the May manager of the month. Two weeks worth of scores decide it. Here’s the table as it stands – basically this week’s highest scorers…

1 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 114 114
2 Init fc Mustafa khan 110 110
3 Walking with Memphis Noel Driver 99 99
4 JonniestaRedmondinho David Spinks 97 97
5 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 95 95
6 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 93 93
7 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 92 92

 

Should Init win it they’ll be the only team to pick up two monthly awards, having also taken the September prize.

 

1 FC Caligula Ajay Supeda 84 2,217
2 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 76 2,201
3 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 69 2,177
4 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 69 2,158
5 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 50 2,156
6 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 114 2,146
7 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 93 2,120
8 Golden Boys Stephanie Cripps 61 2,117

As we go into the final week it’s still too close to call. Caligula have extended their lead over Your Ad Here to 16 points. The two teams have been trading blows at the top for the last few months. No sooner do YAH get back to within spitting distance, than Caligula pull away the following week. The Kolarov Mane are 24 points further back, and who knows, maybe still in contention themselves for the top spot. That is probably just out of reach for Shoelace, who will also have to be careful of Rocky Ba Bauer, Edgbaston, Game of Throw Ins and long time leaders, Golden Boys, who all realistically have a chance of at least fourth place.

 

Player of the week – Lamine Kone – 21 points. Keeping them in the Premier League.

Bargain of the week – Andy King – 13 points. Another Leicester weekly award – they’ve had the most.

Donkey of the week – John Terry – -2 points. The last we’ll see of him. Possibly

Goal of the week – Eden Hazard. What a prick. Obviously realised he needs to play to get a move.

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