Gameweek 29 results

1  same Hornets
Andrew Wade
52 1722
2  same Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
55 1705
3  up The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
74 1696
4  down Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
45 1683
5  down The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
42 1675
6  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
52 1668
7  down The winnings R mine
david bruce
41 1667
8  same Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
44 1652
9  up Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
60 1652
10  down Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
52 1651
11  up greenyteamy
adam greenwood
67 1646
12  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
50 1630
13  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
72 1623
14  down INIT FC
Mustafa khan
60 1621
15  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
65 1620
16  down It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
63 1619
17  down Queen of the north
58 1614
18  up Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
68 1601
19  down Kompany & Co
42 1600
20  up Rico united
63 1596
21  down Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
56 1593
22  down We are Ayling
Paul Murray
53 1592
23  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
59 1581
24  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
54 1574
25  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
63 1573
26  up Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
53 1562
27  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
52 1562
28  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
46 1556
29  up Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
48 1548
30  same Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
43 1544
31  down musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
35 1542
32  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
51 1540
33  down Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
46 1537
34  same King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
50 1531
35  up Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
43 1522
36  up blakes11
Steven Darling
55 1520
37  same To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
52 1519
38  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
35 1516
39  up mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
73 1469
40  down cookster fc
Peter Cook
43 1456
41  up Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
53 1449
42  up Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
54 1447
43  down FTM
Stu Smith
38 1439
44  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
53 1435
45  same iamgroot
scott mcgow
58 1423
46  same Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
58 1419
47  same disco dancer
darren frankland
49 1392
48  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
64 1369
49  same Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
52 1347
50  same Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
50 1211


Buckets Cup quarter finals

Are we on for another double winner in their debut season, much like FC Caligula did in 2015/2016? Hornets are still fighting on both fronts. Their score was the lowest of the quarter final winners this week, but still above the game average and most importantly, enough to see off Fun Lovren Criminals. They will play first time semi finalists, Game of Throw Ins, whilst another last four debutant, Atletico Chappers, will take on Emergency Gap Jumper. Should be an interesting final in Gameweek 31.

Manager of the week – The Vinegar Pissers – Paul Hawkins – 74 points

Three scores crept above 70 points this week, the highest of which was the 74 posted by The Vinegar Pissers. They’re the latest team to launch an assault on the Hornets domination, climbing up into third just behind Brexiter, who themselves, narrowed the gap by three. As well as picking up on another player of the week performance by Heung-Min Son, the Pissers also garnered 15 points from both of Brighton’s goalscorers in their victory over Arsenal. Glen Murray has six in eight games and only Mo Salah and Sergio Aguero have scored more since the turn of the year.

Player of the week – Heung-Min Son – 16 points

His second player of the week total and with that becomes only the third player this season to achieve the highest weekly score on more than one occasion. He had been on a run of blank weeks since his last double figure score and had started dropping out of teams. No goals and assists, the return to the team of Erik Lamela and the purchase of Lucas Moura obviously putting doubt about his return potential. That’ll probably reverse now and He’ll no doubt be a popular choice once Spurs’s double gameweek(s) roll round.

Bargain of the week – Ki Sung-Yeung – 13 points

A South Korean double at the top of the weekly player tables this week. Ki has played nearly every game under Swansea’s new manager and has obviously played an important part in their revival. His last run in the team under the previous manager yielded no returns at all. This time round he has two goals, two assists and two double figure totals in the last four games. And for under £5 million. There’ll be Swansea double gameweeks too.

Twat of the week – Ashley Williams – -2 points

Sam Allardyce solved whatever problems there were at Everton for all of about two games. They’re surprisingly leaky, especially away from home, and three red cards, the latest of which was dished out to their captain for the day, is the most for any team in the top flight. Apart from those bruising bastards over at Watford of course.

Goal of the week – Nemanja Matic.

Last goal in the last minute of the last game.

Gameweek 27 results

1 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 41 1,472
2 NaboombuDirtyYellows Andrew Swift 46 1,469
3 Pescara Rangers Stewart Pope 35 1,447
4 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 66 1,426
5 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 23 1,420
6 RayCrawfordsCrackers Rob Hewer 60 1,411
7 Ciderheads Darren Pope 52 1,408
8 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 34 1,402
9 * Your Ad Here * Matthew Hopkins 37 1,395
10 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 38 1,395
11 Gaalatcticos Colin Goulding 43 1,389
12 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 45 1,386
13 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 28 1,362
14 Van Damme United P Hawkins 41 1,362
15 Paris Spinks Germain David Spinks 27 1,354
16 Biscuitmen Chris Morton 30 1,342
17 Who R U DEAN CRIPPS 43 1,326
18 Accrington Rudyard Ian Williams 49 1,325
19 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 35 1,301
20 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 28 1,300
21 Get to the choppa Mark Bromham 28 1,284
22 Real Jorvik FC Simon Brown 46 1,273
23 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 35 1,271
24 No Recognized Plan Paul Bentz 42 1,228
25 Luxembourg United Simon Smallbone 37 1,225
26 Sportingabiggerwig Alex Ritchie 27 1,212
27 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 53 1,183
28 Crazylegs XI David Caldicott 22 1,137
29 Jordie’s Giants Jordan Raper 43 995


This weekend the average score across the whole game was only 34 points, so despite looking like a table full of low-ish scores in the 30’s and 40’s, the majority of Buckets managers actually performed quite well. Two totals jump out towards the top of the table. Hedgehog’s 66 points, based on the brave/stupid decision to make Papiss Cisse their captain, wins the manager of the week award and secures their bye into the first round proper of the Buckets Cup. RayCrawfordsCrackers couldn’t quite match that to notch their eighth weekly award, but their 60 points was more than enough to clinch them the February Manager of the Month prize.

1 RayCrawfordsCrackers Rob Hewer 60 238
2 Who R U DEAN CRIPPS 43 226
3 Real Jorvik FC Simon Brown 46 214
4 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 45 214
5 Accrington Rudyard Ian Williams 49 214
6 Van Damme United P Hawkins 41 214


There’s no reason why a reduction in the amount of fixtures should lead to such a low scoring average, but with four of the eight games finishing 1-0, and only 15 goals scored, it was one of those weekends in which defences came out on top. Both of our 60+ scorers had Daryl Janmaat in their defence – a wise choice considering Newcastle were up against Villa this weekend. Janmaat assisted Cisse’s goal and is now the second highest assisting defender behind Leighton Baines. In fact, only seven other players can beat his total of seven assists, and he betters the totals of the likes of Ozil, Cazorla, Nasri and Silva. RCC’s had Jason Puncheon in their midfield – our highest scoring player of the week. Palace were the only team to score three this weekend, and Puncheon had a hand in all of them. Team mate Glen Murray is our bargain buy of the week, despite being sent off.

Check the Buckets Cup link for the cup draw. It’s about to happen….


Player of the week – Jason Puncheon – 14 points. Palace looking safer with every passing week.

Bargain of the week – Glen Murray – 9 points. Three in two and one week off.

Donkey of the week – Wes Brown – -2 points. It wouldn’t be a donkey ist without Wes Brown on it. Poor sod didn’t even do anything.

Goal of the week – Jordan Henderson. Narrowly beating Liverpool’s other goal from their defeat of City