Gameweek 38 results

May 23, 2017

up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
85 2315
down When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
80 2312
same Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
77 2274
up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
110 2255
down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
87 2238
up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
91 2221
up Hedgehog Corpse FC
Nick Smith
91 2215
70 2208
same Uriah Rennie 2nd XI
Neil Greenwood
97 2175
10  same To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
84 2161
11  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
97 2157
12  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
75 2134
13  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
76 2123
14  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
80 2114
15  up nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
90 2107
16  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
80 2100
17  up Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
94 2093
18  down Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
77 2090
19  down Go Buffoons Go
Jitesh Lakhani
66 2076
76 2066
21  down Jeff Lamp’s Porsche
David Spinks
61 2063
22  up Yeboah’s Right Foot
Paul Murray
78 2051
23  down Cooksters
Peter Cook
66 2044
24  down Joey Bosa
Paul Bentz
51 2027
25  up 4 Fuchs Ake
Jason Earwicker
62 2024
26  up Jarvis FC
Matt Jarvis
100 2021
27  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
76 2017
28  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
49 2016
29  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
80 2008
30  up jetty city
scott mcgow
73 1979
31  down Have a little dink
Ian Williams
73 1977
32  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
74 1968
33  same RG XV
Ryan Garoghan
77 1960
34  same Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
89 1958
35  up FTM
Stu Smith
92 1930
36  down 30:19
Darren Lavelle
66 1907
37  up Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
68 1871
38  up I am not Zlatan
Colin Goulding
67 1869
39  up Ciderheads
Darren Pope
68 1868
40  down Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
44 1866
41  same Dj daz
darren frankland
74 1857
42  same Crazy Legs XI
David Caldicott
65 1843
43  same Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
68 1822
44  up Pepe Le Blue
79 1821
45  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
57 1810
46  same Big White Chiefs
david frankland
43 1742
47  same Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
40 1714
48  same Bermie Utd
Glen Davies
56 1705
49  up Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
71 1656
50  down Bish Bosh Goal
Simon Purnell
54 1655
51  down bazza 28 united
laura barrett
49 1645
52  same DJ’s Trail Blazers
Danian Jones
55 1638
53  same Racing Club Skegness
Andrew Swift
59 1635

A typically crazy last week in which the Buckets league clocked up another couple of century scores. I’m pretty sure this season has seen more 100+ totals by our managers than any other. I suppose it helps there being 53 of us.

And all you had to do was concentrate on the top five. They scored 23 goals between them. The fixtures had fallen very kindly. As expected, Manchester City walloped Watford, Chelsea thumped Sunderland, Spurs annihilated Hull and Liverpool comfortably despatched of Boro. Even Arsenal, arguably with the trickiest tie, managed to hit three past Everton with ten men.

The four goals Harry Kane hit against Leicester on Thursday convinced many of us to go with him as captain. A simple choice – totally justified. His 17 points made him player of the week for the second week running and for the third time in total. Any combination of this supporting cast of usual suspects – Aguero, Hazard, Coutinho, Sanchez, Alli, De Bruyne, Pedro, Lallana, Jesus, Eriksen (the list goes on) – pretty much guaranteed you your 80+ score.

Kebab Eaters won the week, and fittingly, their 110 points was enough to see them jump into fourth place in the final table and claim the last cash prize. They pipped Edgbaston, who finished 5th for a second consecutive year. They should take some consolation in the fact they clinched the May manager of the month prize. Their record breaking total from last week virtually guaranteed the award, and despite the 87 points they achieved this week not being enough to hang onto fourth, it was more than enough to earn them a place on the role of honour. Here’s the May table…

same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
87 355
same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
91 336
up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
110 331
down When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
80 329
same nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
90 329
down The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
85 325
down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
97 324

Player of the week – Harry Kane – 17 points. Pretty much guarantees his most valuable player status for next season.

Bargain of the week – Geoff Cameron – 12 points. Er!

Donkey of the week – Laurent Koscielny – -2 points. What was he thinking?

Goal of the week – Aaron Ramsey. Probably the first thing he’s done all season.


Gameweek 20 results

December 31, 2012

1 A Pint of Fuller’s P Hawkins 62 1,079
2 Pescara Rangers Stewart Pope 35 1,069
3 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 54 1,064
4 Les Canaris David Spinks 47 1,045
5 Pimp My Side Jordan Raper 37 1,042
6 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 51 1,041
7 (Your Ad Here) Matthew Hopkins 38 1,030
8 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 53 1,027
9 A Few Good Men Darren Pope 31 1,011
10 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 72 994
11 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 49 988
12 None Of The Above Jonny Mabbutt 45 981
13 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 49 966
14 Doing the 91 Colin Goulding 48 966
15 Fancy a brouhaha? Ian Williams 44 944
16 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 47 943
17 Borussia HairBack Alex Ritchie 51 940
18 Body Issues FC Arron Fellows 20 940
19 goodbutnosigurdsson Rob Hewer 50 926
20 Upper Bullens Scouse Mouse 26 920
21 Release The Hounds 5 Paul Mitchell 56 914
22 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 29 901
23 Moxie XI Luke O’Shea 29 895
24 Inter Ealing Paul Bentz 29 888
25 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 40 884
26 Real Jorvik Simon Brown 34 861
27 Lothersdale FC Simon Rider 24 852

Silly season has claimed a lot of victims. All teams had to rely on their benches this week as big names were left out and some unexpected injuries led to a lot of none starters. A lot of teams were floundering after Saturday’s matches. Crazylegs, for example, finished Saturday with a measly 3 points. Thanks to QPR’s weekly butchering, this time at the hands of Luis Suarez and Liverpool, and a couple of substitutions, they managed to pick up 37 more points giving them a respectable, and just slightly below average score of 40. Our team of the week really benefitted from enforced substitutions. But for the promotion of Russell Martin and Raheem Sterling into the squad, and of Luis Suarez to captain to replace the non-playing Tevez, they’d have finished the gameweek with 43 points. Those three players gained Panza Grande another 29 points to finish with with 72. It’s a score which puts them back in the top 10.

Manager of the month is A Pint Of Fullers. It was never going to be anyone else frankly. They had another great week, posting the second highest score of 62 points, and are now top of the overall league aswell.

1 A Pint of Fuller’s P Hawkins 62 361
2 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 49 340
3 (Your Ad Here) Matthew Hopkins 38 336
4 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 54 329
5 Pescara Rangers Stewart Pope 35 323
6 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 53 322

Gareth Bale got himself suspended for picking up his 5th booking, all of which have been for diving. Unfortunately for those who like Bale in their fantasy squad you have to put up with the 1 in 4 game chance he’ll get himself carded. From hat trick hero to one point zero in the space of a few days. And I thought he’d follow up that match winning performance with another. Nice captaincy work Gareth. You cheating twat.

Proof this week that all of Stoke’s defensive solidity comes from the suspended pair of Ryan Shawcross and Geoff Cameron. Stoke shipped 3 goals – the first time they’ve conceded more than one since the middle of October. Robert Huth contributed towards one of Southamptons goals by shanking it off he’s own crossbar and setting up an easy knock in for Jay Rodriguez. Andy Wilkinson went one better and put it straight into his own net. Ironically it was the defensive replacements that rescued them at the other end of the pitch. Ryan Shotton (assist) and Matthew Upson (a goal?!) scraped them a draw. Cameron Jerome, for good measure, scored the goal of the week. Defensive frailties creeping in – or Christmas fatigue? Hopefully the latter. They’re still the only steady defensive option in the league at the moment.

It’s the start of the January transfer window. Some deals are being whispered about already. Newcastle fans will welcome the news that Mathieu Debuchy looks set to join. If ever a team needed a defensive shake up it’s Newcastle. 14 clean sheets last season is a distant memory. They’ve conceded 15  in 5 games. Thank God for Aston Villa. Who are only marginally worse, having conceded 16 in the same amount of time. Newcastle fans will not welcome the news that Demba Ba looks eager to activate that ridiculous clause in his contract. Chelsea the front-runners apparently. Lets hope that a) he has a similar second half to this season than he had last – and forgets where the net is, and b) that so-called ticking time-bomb of a knee injury flares up big time, and he spends the majority of it in the treatment room. Not bitter. In all seriousness, if the move happens, will he play as much, and as a result will he be as prolific in front of goal? And will Papiss Cisse take up that mantle again? It won’t be the only transfer related headache for fantasy managers. Best playing that new wild card you get at the end of the window, unless you’re basement dwellers Lothersdale FC. Who, for the record, also compete in another league called “2 Horse Race” – and are….3rd. Oh dear!

  • Player of the week – Theo Walcott – 26 points. Highest individual score of the year thus far
  • Bargain of the week – Edin Dzeko – 16 points. Always seems to score big when he starts.
  • Donkey of the week – Samir Nasri – -2 points. The leagues biggest wimp gets himself sent off.

Goal of the weekend

Cameron Jerome, of all people, scores the goal of the season so far

Gameweek 20 preview

December 29, 2012

29 Dec 12:45 Sunderland Sunderland v Tottenham Tottenham
29 Dec 15:00 Aston Villa Aston Villa v Wigan Wigan
29 Dec 15:00 Fulham Fulham v Swansea Swansea
29 Dec 15:00 Man Utd Man Utd v West Brom West Brom
29 Dec 15:00 Norwich Norwich v Man City Man City
29 Dec 15:00 Reading Reading v West Ham West Ham
29 Dec 15:00 Stoke City Stoke City v Southampton Southampton
29 Dec 17:30 Arsenal Arsenal v Newcastle Newcastle
30 Dec 13:30 Everton Everton v Chelsea Chelsea
30 Dec 16:00 QPR QPR v Liverpool Liverpool

There’s a couple of selection headaches that will probably affect most managers this weekend. I say probably – I mean hopefully. It seriously affects me anyway. It’s put a massive spanner in my works. Silly season is claiming it’s fair share of suspension and injury victims. There’s a few undroppables that may have to be dropped. And probably at a cost.

Michu is out. Shawcross and Cameron are suspended. Carlos Tevez is doubtful.

Given the fixture build up, and the wealth of attacking options that City have, don’t be surprised if Tevez has the week off, regardless of his fitness. He’s maybe the least risky of these players to drop. His value has been dropping a touch in recent weeks anyway due to some iffy City performances and a lack of any meaningful contribution for 3 weeks.

As for the others – it’s a bit more of a conundrum. Take them out completely, or bench them? It all depends on the price you bought them at compared to the value they carry at this moment. Michu’s price has risen week on week on week. He’s at 8.3 million at the moment. His value will drop if lots of managers shift him out of their team, but I’m not sure that will happen. If, as most Buckets managers seem to have done, he’s been picked up in the mid 7 millions, or cheaper (lucky buggers), then it’s a bit of a hit to take. You’ve got to bench him haven’t you? He’s due back for the Villa game on New Years Day. If he starts against Villa, he’s odds on for a goal, and would be a front runner for the captaincy.  Keep him and bench him.

Shawcross and Cameron are suspended for Stoke’s home tie against Southampton. Had  they played you’d bet on another clean sheet to add to the 9 they’ve kept already. I imagine Pulis will replace them with Ryan Shotton and maybe Matthew Upson (remember him?). Huth and Wilkinson will retain their places. It’s still a strong defensive line up, but is it worth chopping and changing for a week? Both players will inevitably be straight back in for their next game. Andy Wilkinson is priced at 4.4 million. He doesn’t contribute highly with goals, bonus or assists – and he’s on 4 yellows. He could be suspended himself next week. Shotton is listed as a midfielder, so there’s no benefit there. And Upson is shit. Shawcross’ value is on the rise too – quite steeply in the last few weeks. If you’re going to kick him out with the intention of bringing him straight back in again, you might end up losing out on some valuable transfer fees. Keep and bench?

My head hurts.

Manager of the month is decided with these results.

Good luck and happy new year.


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