Gameweek 32 and March manager of the month

1  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
98 2001
2  down Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
89 1993
3  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
79 1974
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
103 1932
5  up Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
96 1909
6  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
82 1896
7  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
106 1866
8  down INIT FC
Mustafa khan
77 1845
9  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
120 1837
10  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
94 1828
11  down FTM
Stu Smith
65 1823
12  up Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
94 1809
13  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
83 1805
14  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
71 1804
15  same Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
89 1801
16  up Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
117 1783
17  same RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
80 1759
18  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
90 1756
19  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
78 1754
20  down King raggg
Steven Darling
58 1748
21  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
93 1737
22  up Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
93 1736
23  up Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
87 1730
24  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
90 1727
25  down Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
56 1707
26  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
73 1706
27  up Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
106 1696
28  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
95 1693
29  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
59 1690
30  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
91 1679
31  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
93 1675
32  same PenshawPerformers
david bruce
71 1662
33  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
71 1656
34  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
100 1655
35  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
53 1646
36  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
57 1636
37  up Morningblues
Jeff Morning
65 1633
38  down The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
48 1631
39  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
48 1628
40  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
40 1624
41  up Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
85 1621
42  same Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
70 1615
43  down Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
62 1611
44  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
69 1600
45  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
68 1584
46  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
51 1575
47  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
54 1544
48  down ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
48 1540
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
57 1463
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
61 1408

 

March manager of the month – Ayaj Supeda – FC Caligula – 270 points

One of a lowly seven triple figure totals in a frustrating double gameweek took Caligula over the line to the March manager prize.

1  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
106 270
2  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
83 264
3  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
93 262
4  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
82 261
5  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
120 258
6  down Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
68 257
7  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
94 257
8  down Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
89 255
9  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
98 253

Caligula played the free hit. Their closest challengers all went with the triple captain. Bullens will be cursing their luck the most, opting to put the armband on Raheem Sterling who returned absolutely nothing other than his appearance points for the one game he took part in. Calilgula also punted on Sterling – who didn’t? He wasn’t the only heavily backed double gameweeker who only made a single appearance. It was Aymeric Laporte, for the second consecutive Manchester City double gameweek, who impressed the most, and contributed the highest score to Caligula’s total.

Manager of the week – Sean Whyton – Rip Roaring Reds – 120 points

The Reds equaled the highest weekly gameweek score but only scored four goals from their bench-boosted squad. They needed to better the nine goals scored in the first double gameweek of the season by Shoelace to claim the highest score prize. Had they banged in nine they’d be outright leaders posting a potential 150 point weekly score.

Player of the week – Christian Eriksen – Tottenham Hotspur – 20 points

One of the few elite players to play both games and contribute in both, although Spurs assets weren’t all that heavily backed overall, certainly in comparison to those of City, United and Chelsea. Maybe that was to do with their tricky opening fixture against Liverpool. More was expected of United. City seemed happy to do the bare minimum and Chelsea, despite two victories, looked more convincing in their second fixture. Or was that just to do with the fact that Eden Hazard put in his monthly big performance?

Bargain of the week – Ruben Loftus-Cheek – Chelsea – 19 points

Hazard featured in most free hit squads. Punting on Ruben Loftus-Cheek would have earned you four more points for nearly £6 million less. Hazard was all set for the goal of the week nod until he was out-Hazarded by his younger team mate with the sumptuous curler that killed the game against Brighton.

Twat of the week – Ashley Young – Manchester United – -1 points

Indicative of Manchester United’s poor double gameweek return. No clean sheets was bad enough. Add to that only a single appearance by their most popular defensive pick, Victor Lindelof. Rashford and Martial impressed in the first game but neither started the second. Worst of all, Ashley Young received two quick yellows to end up on his minus score.

Goal of the week – Ruben Loftus-Cheek. 8m27s in.

Gameweek 32 results

same Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
89 1873
same When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
75 1793
same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
84 1773
up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
81 1766
down Hedgehog Corpse FC
Nick Smith
79 1764
same RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
73 1753
up Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
88 1744
up Joey Bosa
Paul Bentz
87 1735
down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
49 1716
10  up Uriah Rennie 2nd XI
Neil Greenwood
76 1711
11  up Yeboah’s Right Foot
Paul Murray
64 1703
12  down To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
61 1702
13  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
82 1699
14  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
68 1698
15  down 4 Fuchs Ake
Jason Earwicker
54 1697
16  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
62 1694
17  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
56 1693
18  up Go Buffoons Go
Jitesh Lakhani
87 1686
19  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
68 1684
20  down Cooksters
Peter Cook
62 1683
21  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
51 1655
22  up Jeff Lamp’s Porsche
David Spinks
100 1652
23  same Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
58 1650
24  same QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
66 1648
25  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
46 1640
26  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
74 1631
27  down Have a little dink
Ian Williams
59 1630
28  down Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
65 1627
29  up Jarvis FC
Matt Jarvis
80 1627
30  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
72 1622
31  down nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
57 1608
32  up Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
60 1577
33  down RG XV
Ryan Garoghan
46 1572
34  down 30:19
Darren Lavelle
50 1568
35  up I am not Zlatan
Colin Goulding
62 1557
36  down jetty city
scott mcgow
57 1555
37  up Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
76 1548
38  up Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
73 1531
39  down FTM
Stu Smith
50 1527
40  same Ciderheads
Darren Pope
63 1511
41  up Pepe Le Blue
DEAN CRIPPS
83 1475
42  down Crazy Legs XI
David Caldicott
37 1459
43  same Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
52 1453
44  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
63 1448
45  down Dj daz
darren frankland
55 1445
46  same Big White Chiefs
david frankland
43 1407
47  same Bermie Utd
Glen Davies
25 1384
48  up bazza 28 united
laura barrett
67 1383
49  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
41 1373
50  same Bish Bosh Goal
Simon Purnell
66 1363
51  same Racing Club Skegness
Andrew Swift
61 1320
52  same Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
56 1292
53  same DJ’s Trail Blazers
Danian Jones
59 1277

 

Still no team seems capable of catching Aquamar. They’ve been on the rise in the international game too, jumping to 2,602nd in the world. More often than not they’re outscoring most of the Buckets chasing pack, and always maintaining that lead, which currently stands at 80 points. That’s the highest it’s been. They’re chip-less and now wildcard-less – but has playing them early built up an unassailable lead?

Poor When Harry Met Alli, The Craggy Islanders, Biscuitmen, Hedgehog’s and Kebab Eaters have been staring at the back of Aquamar’s head for most of the season. They continue to score above average every week without making any real inroads, and now they’ve got the relentless rise of teams like Rico United and Joey Bosa coming up behind them to contend with. Rico and Joey were barely top 20 at the turn of the year, but now sit in 6th and 8th respectively. All of those in contention for a league prize, or with hopes of catching the leaders hold some kind of chip or have their remaining wildcard. With two (potentially three) more double gameweeks to cram into the final six, their could be more twists and turns.

Aquamar benefited from Palace’s surprise thumping of Arsenal last night. Mamadou Sakho was promoted from the bench to join Wilfried Zaha in their XI to add 17 points. Conversely, Jeff Lamp’s Porsche, despite outscoring everybody else and breaking the 100 point barrier, would have been hoping for a bit more from Alexis Sanchez.  Before last night’s match they were sat on 98 points with hopes of catching the highest weekly score total. Only 2 points were added and it leaves most of us questioning Sanchez’s attitude and his worth (and that of the entire Arsenal squad) in these crunch closing weeks of the season.

However, you couldn’t have named a better player than Heung-Min Son as your captain this week, and that’s what JLP did. These are the kind of ballsy decisions that win you fantasy prizes, so lets see if they can follow that up with a challenge for the April Manager of the month award.

 

Player of the week – Heung-Min Son – 19 points. Can he hold onto his place now that Harry Kane is back?

Bargain of the week – Phil Jagielka – 12 points. Second successive double figure score.

Donkey of the week – Sebastian Larsson – -2 points. Never a sending off

Goal of the week – Dele Alli. Just needs to cut out those shit celebrations.

Gameweek 32 results

1 FC Caligula Ajay Supeda 65 1,852
2 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 51 1,815
3 Atlético Chappers Richard Chapman 61 1,769
4 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 64 1,768
5 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 78 1,762
6 Golden Boys Stephanie Cripps 58 1,756
7 Sergio Five O DEAN CRIPPS 66 1,744
8 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 76 1,741
9 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 52 1,738
10 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 62 1,737
11 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 56 1,720
12 Walking with Memphis Noel Driver 53 1,714
13 4 Lime Jellies Ian Williams 58 1,714
14 Grievous AngelRangel Andrew Swift 64 1,707
15 SS3 FC Paul Murray 40 1,698
16 Bicuitmen Chris Morton 55 1,698
17 JonniestaRedmondinho David Spinks 65 1,692
18 scotty2hotty scott mcgow 68 1,692
19 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 67 1,690
20 greensmeansbusiness adam greenwood 51 1,680
21 Init fc Mustafa khan 66 1,677
22 The Craggy Islanders Adrian Roche 72 1,677
23 Gaalacticos Colin Goulding 45 1,674
24 Howayman Mark Bromham 68 1,673
25 Romeo’s Honda Van Rob Hewer 56 1,668
26 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 45 1,651
27 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 64 1,640
28 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 59 1,631
29 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 55 1,627
30 Below Par Paul Bentz 51 1,612
31 The Hardy Boys Alan Hardy 53 1,596
32 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 52 1,586
33 RICO UNITED JASON REACHER 61 1,569
34 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 67 1,569
35 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 59 1,545
36 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 38 1,529
37 Sweet Cherry Pie Jason Earwicker 69 1,522
38 Baker Bum Boys Lewis Baker 43 1,496
39 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 50 1,446
40 Ciderheads Darren Pope 39 1,438
41 Go Buffoons Go!!! Jitesh Lakhani 39 1,437
42 Bish Bosh Goal Simon Purnell 28 1,321
43 REAL JORVIK Simon Brown 34 1,230
44 BrussiaHairbach Alex Ritchie 33 1,173

 

As well as easily being the best player pun team name in the league this year, The Kolarov Mane is also the highest scoring team of gameweek 32. Their 78 points sees them leap into 5th place overall, right back in the mix for the 3rd and 4th place prizes. With the double gameweeks on the horizon, teams as far down as 14th and maybe even further could still be in the mix for placing prizes.

Kolarov Mane played their second wildcard ahead of this week bringing in 11 new players and clearly tailoring their squad for the upcoming double headers. Hector Bellerin and Dimitri Payet were the most effective, both scoring double figure scores.

The Villa factor reaped it’s rewards again this week as a patched up Chelsea strolled to a 4-0 pummeling over the league’s bottom team. There were five Chelsea players among the weeks highest scorers with seven points or more – Pedro scoring higher than anyone. Amazingly, the captain of the title favourites and league leaders is still only worth £4.4 million pounds. Wes Morgan was the bargain buy of the week.

FC Caligula will play The Craggy Islanders in the Buckets Cup Final. Caligula kept up their quest for an unprecedented double with a skin of their teeth victory over Neil Madrid by       65-64. Both had almost identical squads with the difference being, arguably, the Christian Fuchs assist for Wes Morgan’s goal in Leicester’s victory over Southampton. The other semi was more clear cut. The Craggy Islanders saw off Upper Bullens with the third highest score of the week. Although their All Out Attack chip might feel a little wasted. The two defenders they played picked up more points than their three attackers, and they’d have picked up an extra point by simply sticking to a standard 3-4-3 or 3-5-2.

 

Player of the week – Pedro – 16 points. He was meant to do this a lot more often.

Bargain of the week – Wes Morgan – 15 points. And with this joins Fuchs and Huth in the top 10 defenders.

Donkey of the week – Alan Hutton – -3 points. Somehow the first Villa donkey of the season.

Goal of the week – Dimitri Payet. Stupid free kick looks like he took it with an Impossiball.

 

Gameweek 32 preview

02 Apr 12:45 Aston Villa v Chelsea
02 Apr 15:00 Arsenal v Watford
02 Apr 15:00 Bournemouth v Man City
02 Apr 15:00 Norwich v Newcastle
02 Apr 15:00 Stoke v Swansea
02 Apr 15:00 Sunderland v West Brom
02 Apr 15:00 West Ham v Crystal Palace
02 Apr 17:30 Liverpool v Spurs
03 Apr 13:30 Leicester v Southampton
03 Apr 16:00 Man Utd v Everton

 

Our last remaining unscheduled fixture has been….scheduled. The Everton v Crystal Palace game cancelled to accommodate both teams’ appearance in the FA Cup semi final will now be played on April 13th. That’s in the next gameweek. Gameweeks 34, 35 and 37 were already a tactical minefield – now you’ve gameweek 33 to worry about.

Start planning now. The earlier you start, the more players you can get in. There’s no simple way of breaking it all down. Everton and Liverpool have the most games left to play. Everton play twice in GW33, GW34 and GW37. Liverpool play twice in GW34 and GW37, but also play in the reduced GW35, whereas Everton don’t.

There are a host of teams on 30 games played who feature twice in at least one double gameweek. If they feature in both, it’s likely they don’t feature in the reduced gameweek. All those on 31 games don’t play twice in any gameweek, but do all play in the reduced gameweek. Two of whom are Leicester and Spurs. How many of their players dare you kick in to touch to make way for double gameweekers?

Use of this gameweek and gameweek 36 could be key. Those without wildcards might want to leave these gameweeks free to build up their available free transfers. And those with wildcards just need to figure out the best time to play them.

 

 

Gameweek 32 results

1 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 49 1,816
2 Pescara Rangers Stewart Pope 51 1,793
3 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 44 1,783
4 NaboombuDirtyYellows Andrew Swift 51 1,756
5 RayCrawfordsCrackers Rob Hewer 65 1,747
6 * Your Ad Here * Matthew Hopkins 60 1,722
7 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 35 1,720
8 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 45 1,719
9 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 43 1,705
10 Gaalatcticos Colin Goulding 52 1,695
11 Van Damme United P Hawkins 78 1,688
12 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 65 1,669
13 Ciderheads Darren Pope 48 1,669
14 Who R U DEAN CRIPPS 50 1,636
15 Accrington Rudyard Ian Williams 53 1,634
16 Paris Spinks Germain David Spinks 55 1,628
17 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 51 1,621
18 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 61 1,619
19 Biscuitmen Chris Morton 42 1,617
20 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 55 1,583
21 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 47 1,571
22 Get to the choppa Mark Bromham 41 1,545
23 No Recognized Plan Paul Bentz 40 1,516
24 Luxembourg United Simon Smallbone 59 1,505
25 Real Jorvik FC Simon Brown 56 1,491
26 Sportingabiggerwig Alex Ritchie 48 1,488
27 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 53 1,447
28 Crazylegs XI David Caldicott 78 1,406
29 Jordie’s Giants Jordan Raper 26 1,155

 

This seasons winners of the Buckets Cup are….Who R U. The league newcomers overcame Hedgehog Corpse in the final by 50 points to 44. Hedgehog scored three goals to Who R U’s one, but kept less clean sheets, made less assists and picked up less bonus points. Congratulations Who RU.

Manager of the week is Crazylegs. Another surprise seeing as how they gave up playing in week two. They and Van Damme United both collected 78 points – far and away the best scores of the week – but Crazylegs scored three goals to Van Damme’s two, and so claim the award.

Nothing much changed at the top. The top four all scored within seven points of each other, and around the average weekly score of 46 points. A couple of chasing teams scored well and both RayCrawfordsCrackers and *Your Ad Here* pulled themselves back into contention for a top four place. With a blank and a double gameweek to come before the end of April there is more than enough opportunity to catch the leading pack. Pescara won the last double gameweek with a 60 point swing on those scoring the average for the week, so even those teams in the high 1600’s should still consider themselves in with a chance.

Last week Christian Benteke equalled Dusan Tadic’s highest weekly individual score of 23 points. This week Yannick Bolasie beat it. Bolasie picked up all three bonus points for scoring three and assisting the other of Palace’s four against Sunderland. Glen Murray, who scored the fourth, is in even better form. That was his sixth in seven games and his third consecutive double figure total. He’s just pipped to the bargain buy of the week by Ashley Young, whose value of £4.9 million seems staggeringly low for that of a (now) regular attacking starter in a top three team. His reputation obviously still goes before him, as does that of Angel Di Maria who he’s keeping out of the team. Ten times more managers own Young than Di Maria.

 

Player of the week – Yannick Bolasie – 24 points. Can he hold onto the points record with two double gameweeks to come.

Bargain of the week – Ashley Young – 14 points. None of United’s starting midfielders will cost you more than £8.5 million and all are scoring well.

Donkey of the week – Vincent Kompany – -1 points. Probably long overdue for his well below par season.

Goal of the week – Aaron Cresswell. Banging free kick. Shocking video.