|51||Puddle Splash Van
Manager of the week – Jitesh Lakhani – Salah Buffoon!!! – 90 points
We’re banging the high scores in week after week. Another 90+ score to win the weekly accolade. Bigger scores were achieved, as in Salah Buffoon!!!’s case, with the right captain choice of the two most popular this week. Harry Kane trolled the majority by not only not scoring, or even getting close, but by also picking up a yellow. Eden Hazard did what it appears he might do every week and put in a man of the match performance adding 14 more points to his total. Hazard is this season’s Salah. He’s never been more essential, posting returns in every gameweek bar one, adding £0.8 million to his value already. Elsewhere the Buffoons scored with three Wolves players, which is becoming template, Callum Wilson, the unlikely king of the assists and Alexandre Lacazette, who is quietly totting the goals up for an Arsenal team that no-one dare mention as title contenders.
Player of the week – Matt Doherty – Wolverhampton Wanderers – 15 points
As essential as Hazard in many ways, for his price and now his scoring rate. Only Hazard can better Doherty’s three double figure returns. This is is highest score to date, and takes him to third in the defender ranks. It’s a good season for attacking wing backs and it means you don’t necessarily need all three of Mendy, Robertson and Alonso.
Bargain of the week – Callum Wilson – Bournemouth – 14 points
Three goals ain’t bad but seven assists is bloody marvelous. Bournemouth are free scoring, hitting four for the second time this season. He and strike partner Josh King scored 27 points between them this week and have 91 points between them overall. A double pronged Bournemouth attack looks like a good proposition.
Twat of the week – Christian Kabasele – Watford – -4 points
You’ve got to go some to get a minus four. Well done son. Watford were twat team of the season last time out and this makes up for their totally twat free start to the season.
Goal of the week – Gylfi Sigurdsson. 49s in.