1  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
104 2345
2  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
105 2304
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
95 2285
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
79 2247
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
85 2223
6  same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
121 2196
7  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
98 2158
8  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
83 2137
9  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
88 2126
10  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
125 2125
11  same Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
86 2099
12  down FTM
Stu Smith
82 2096
13  same Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
86 2084
14  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
110 2061
15  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
115 2048
16  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
82 2043
17  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
117 2026
18  down King raggg
Steven Darling
74 2026
19  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
72 2022
20  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
62 2022
21  same Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
90 2017
22  same Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
76 2002
23  down Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
52 1997
24  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
53 1970
25  same RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
62 1958
26  up Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
97 1956
27  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
74 1954
28  same Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
87 1952
29  up PenshawPerformers
david bruce
85 1946
30  up Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
91 1946
31  down SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
78 1938
32  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
66 1934
33  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
59 1923
34  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
94 1896
35  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
96 1896
36  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
69 1883
37  same Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
81 1879
38  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
72 1866
39  same El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
80 1865
40  up Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
86 1845
41  same Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
58 1833
42  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
85 1833
43  down Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
59 1832
44  up It’s coming home
scott mcgow
95 1828
45  down QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
57 1827
46  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
51 1815
47  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
73 1798
48  same ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
46 1736
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
57 1672
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
71 1607

 

Top of the league – The Craggy Islanders – Adrian Roche – 2345 points

Da Pitch aren’t giving up on that title yet. They’re making every effort to close that gap. Scoring 105 points should help, unless the team you’re chasing racks up 104. The big scores were plentiful this week – seven in triple figures – only one less than last week. Albion aren’t out of contention either, posting 95 points. Our leaders however, crucially, still have their triple captain.

April manager of the month – Kebab Eaters United – Paul Howard – 351 points

April has probably produced a Buckets record for the highest monthly score for a four week game month. It took Kebab Eaters 351 points to win it – which included two 100+ scores. We’re looking at an average score of close to 90 points a week. Mentions too for the Islanders, Caligula and Da Pitch who weren’t far behind, also averaging an 80+ weekly total.

1  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
117 351
2  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
104 344
3  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
121 330
4  up But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
105 330

Manager of the week – Rip Roaring Reds – Sean Whyton – 125 points

For the second successive week we have a highest weekly score of 125 points. It was the triple captain chip that garnered the triple figure totals this week. And it was the triple captaining of one player in particular, Mo Salah, that reaped the greatest reward. The Islanders held the highest weekly score prize for one week only – they only scored four goals to the Reds’ seven. Most of us realised that all out Liverpool was the way to go with them coming up against the whippiest of whipping boys, Huddersfield. I suspect the Islanders are saving their triple captain for the last gameweek – a tactic which I think they’ve employed before – but had they gone with it they’d have accumulated the highest weekly score, won the manager of the week, the manager of the month AND probably sewn up the Buckets title.

Player of the week – Mohamed Salah – Liverpool – 19 points

It’s Salah’s second player of the week award. What a week to land the triple captain chip. He was always going to be the one and this Huddersfield fixture was always likely to be the game. There have been frustrating moments throughout the fantasy season for Salah owners, but he’s still leading scorer, and now by a fair distance. It appears that by not reaching the heights of last season he’s unworthy of a player of the year nomination or a place in the team of the year. Nonsense.

Bargain of the week – Cyrus Christie – Fulham – 11 points

Three consecutive clean sheets for Fulham. How did that happen? There’s no point in discussing this any further. Only ghost ships own Fulham defenders.

Twat of the week – Ainsley Maitland-Niles – Arsenal – -2 points

Doesn’t anybody want Champions League football next season? Maitland-Niles did Arsenal’s Europa League cause more good with dopey 30 minute red. He was on the Rip Roaring Reds’ bench. A smart place to put him.

Goal of the week – Ryan Babel. No vid.

Advertisements
1  same The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
37 2146
2  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
55 2108
3  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
71 2104
4  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
59 2099
5  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
39 2098
6  up Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
71 2094
7  up Hornets
Andrew Wade
54 2073
8  down Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
51 2070
9  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
60 2047
10  up Queen of the north
DORINE REACHER
76 2036
11  up Rico united
JASON REACHER
64 2029
12  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
43 2028
13  down Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
55 2024
14  same The winnings R mine
david bruce
57 2020
15  same Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
58 2016
16  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
52 2001
17  down Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
45 2000
18  same It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
46 1990
19  same Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
53 1982
20  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
51 1972
21  up We are Ayling
Paul Murray
71 1953
22  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
58 1948
23  down Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
41 1943
24  down Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
50 1941
25  down Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
51 1936
26  up To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
68 1927
27  up Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
62 1922
28  down Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
48 1921
29  down Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
33 1914
30  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
54 1914
31  up mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
71 1911
32  same King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
56 1908
33  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
58 1901
34  same Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
36 1882
35  up FTM
Stu Smith
49 1882
36  down Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
32 1879
37  up blakes11
Steven Darling
71 1878
38  same Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
49 1877
39  down musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
37 1868
40  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
58 1800
41  up iamgroot
scott mcgow
60 1798
42  up cookster fc
Peter Cook
43 1784
43  up Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
41 1778
44  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
26 1770
45  same disco dancer
darren frankland
58 1764
46  same Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
31 1724
47  same Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
40 1712
48  same Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
45 1653
49  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
42 1643
50  same Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
39 1513

 

April Manager of the Month – Edgbaston – Micheal Dineen – 267 points

In what was probably our closest manager of the month tussle of the season, the prize goes to Edgbaston. All of the teams in contention could have pinched the top spot with a better captain choice. Most plumped for Salah, who had a rare off week. Some, most notably Caligula, could have come out on top with a different team selection. Caligula had an extra 10 points on the bench which would have seen them over the line. Having said that, Edgbaston could also have picked up a few more points, opting as they did for Hugo Lloris over Mat Ryan and Pascal Gross over Willian. Caligula’s poor showing saw them drop to fifth overall. The gap is down to 36 points behind the Vinegar Pissers, with The Craggy Islanders and Nashton Villa now leading the chase. Mega double gameweek to come – it’s still anybody’s.

1  up Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
59 267
2  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
52 262
3  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
39 258
4  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
60 256
5  same disco dancer
darren frankland
58 249
6  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
71 246

Manager of the week – Queen of the North – Dorine Reacher – 76 points

Queen of the North became only the fifth team to achieve a second manager of the week nod and move into the top 10 overall – although they’re probably out of the running for a top four place with no chips remaining ahead of the double gameweek. The key to a high score was stocking up on Palace players who made themselves safe with their 5-0 rout of Leicester. Wilfried Zaha bagged his second double figure score in three weeks and was the Queen’s highest scoring player.

Player of the week – Dusan Tadic – 15 points

Despite Palace’s best efforts it was another relegation threatened team who provided us with this weeks best player. Southampton look semi-revitalised and not yet ready to give up on their Premier League status – and may now offer us some options for their double gameweek – Tadic being one of them. He normally shows up for one week of every season with a big score. He chipped in with 23 points back in gameweek 8 of the 2014-2015 season.

Bargain of the week – Mamadou Sakho – 13 points

There we are. The Palace representative. Sakho was one of four Palace players to hit double figures this week. Lots of managers have taken a punt on Zaha given his good form, but not so many on any other player, probably due to the fact they only have one game next week. All others have been gradually discarded in preparation for the GW37. They have Stoke and West Brom left to play – which in the middle of the season would tempt you towards them. Now they’re safe and with those two teams still fighting, it might be best to look elsewhere.

Twat of the week – Marc Albrighton – -2 points

It’s very difficult to time tackles when you’re wearing flip flops and sunglasses.

Goal of the week – Dusan Tadic

No vid for this toe-poke. Tadic again. You definitely won’t see this name mentioned again until next season.

Gameweek 35 results

May 2, 2017

same Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
63 2040
up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
79 1990
down When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
75 1987
up RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
86 1955
up Hedgehog Corpse FC
Nick Smith
69 1937
down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
53 1928
up Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
80 1905
same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
48 1885
down Uriah Rennie 2nd XI
Neil Greenwood
44 1884
10  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
49 1883
11  up Joey Bosa
Paul Bentz
71 1880
12  up Cooksters
Peter Cook
60 1860
13  up Yeboah’s Right Foot
Paul Murray
56 1858
14  up 4 Fuchs Ake
Jason Earwicker
72 1857
15  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
38 1856
16  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
50 1853
17  down INIT FC
Mustafa khan
42 1853
18  same To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
61 1852
19  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
35 1841
20  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
38 1828
21  same Go Buffoons Go
Jitesh Lakhani
46 1824
22  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
57 1824
23  up Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
58 1823
24  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
51 1817
25  same QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
50 1809
26  up Jeff Lamp’s Porsche
David Spinks
75 1803
27  up nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
64 1790
28  down Jarvis FC
Matt Jarvis
50 1784
29  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
65 1779
30  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
31 1768
31  same Have a little dink
Ian Williams
48 1764
32  same jetty city
scott mcgow
60 1744
33  same Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
66 1741
34  same 30:19
Darren Lavelle
46 1713
35  up Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
82 1712
36  down RG XV
Ryan Garoghan
52 1709
37  down I am not Zlatan
Colin Goulding
66 1706
38  same Ciderheads
Darren Pope
49 1676
39  up FTM
Stu Smith
62 1672
40  down Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
49 1663
41  same Crazy Legs XI
David Caldicott
35 1631
42  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
49 1630
43  up Dj daz
darren frankland
57 1616
44  down Pepe Le Blue
DEAN CRIPPS
35 1596
45  same Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
31 1587
46  same Big White Chiefs
david frankland
33 1567
47  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
58 1535
48  up bazza 28 united
laura barrett
51 1531
49  down Bermie Utd
Glen Davies
43 1526
50  down Bish Bosh Goal
Simon Purnell
44 1525
51  same Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
69 1469
52  same Racing Club Skegness
Andrew Swift
45 1443
53  same DJ’s Trail Blazers
Danian Jones
46 1440

 

Quite a few managers played their all out attack chips this weekend. Well, you’ve got to get rid of it sometime I suppose. This was on the Saturday in which seven of the ten teams to play kept a clean sheet, and the player of the week was the game’s lowest priced first team regular, penalty saving goalkeeper, Eldin Jakupovic.

Maybe Aquamar thinks the league is won. They’re taking hits for fun at the moment. Another three this week for eight more points, although all worked out ridiclously well. Aguero, Stephens and Hazard returned 37 points – and all are set up nicely for the upcoming double gameweeks. The gap has closed up at the top again – now at 50 points. And there continues to be a lot of jostling for position behind. Kebab Eaters, second two weeks ago, are now down to sixth. Rico United climb into prize money contention with the highest score of the week, and down in seventh, Biscuitmen posted an 80 point score to keep themselves in the hunt.

Rico’s week winning 86 points wasn’t quite enough to pinch the manager of the month prize. They fell short of Hucking Fell who also held off challenges from The Craggy Islanders and Shoelace to pocket the £60.

same Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
58 414
up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
79 400
down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
51 396
up RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
86 391

 

Player of the week – Eldin Jakupovic – 14 points. I don’t know where I’m meant to go with the bargain award

Bargain of the week award – Jack Stephens – 8 points. The other regular £4.1 million man.

Donkey of the week award – Nacho Monreal – 0 points. They’re not convincing ahead of their double double gameweeks

Goal of the week – Emre Can. 

Gameweek 35 preview

April 28, 2017

Southampton v Hull
Stoke v West Ham
Sunderland v Bournemouth
West Brom v Leicester
Crystal Palace v Burnley
Man Utd v Swansea
Everton v Chelsea
Middlesbrough v Man City
Spurs v Arsenal
Watford v Liverpool

An island of single gameweek calm in between the double gameweek madness and a week in which we might see a lot of wildcarding, bearing in mind you can’t wildcard and chip at the same time. Arsenal and Southampton have two consecutive double gameweeks coming up. Gameweek 37 has five extra games with all of the top six playing twice. Good luck figuring all that out.

Southampton could be worth investing in ahead of time given they’ve got Hull at home this weekend. Hull’s resurgence has been built on a strong home record. Away, they’re a slightly less threatening proposition. Their last away point came back in January. Southampton come in relatively cheap. Three of their regular back four come in at under £5 million and those of us that have persevered with Manolo Gabbiadini may finally see some attacking returns for only £6.4 million.

We’ll know our April manager of the month after this weekend. Here’s the table…

up Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
86 356
same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
82 349
up Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
74 327
down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
41 324
up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
77 321

Realistically, there may only be two teams in it. Shoelace could add to their cup win, whereas Hucking Fell normally pick up at least one prize per season. Watch out for Aquamar though.

Gameweek 36 results

May 3, 2016

1 FC Caligula Ajay Supeda 41 2,141
2 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 32 2,129
3 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 54 2,110
4 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 50 2,108
5 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 78 2,093
6 Golden Boys Stephanie Cripps 43 2,056
7 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 48 2,040
8 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 49 2,027
9 Atlético Chappers Richard Chapman 39 2,009
10 Sergio Five O DEAN CRIPPS 31 2,005
11 4 Lime Jellies Ian Williams 32 1,984
12 Walking with Memphis Noel Driver 58 1,983
13 Init fc Mustafa khan 46 1,982
14 Bicuitmen Chris Morton 33 1,974
15 JonniestaRedmondinho David Spinks 43 1,970
16 SS3 FC Paul Murray 46 1,964
17 scotty2hotty scott mcgow 37 1,956
18 Howayman Mark Bromham 48 1,952
19 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 54 1,936
20 The Craggy Islanders Adrian Roche 46 1,933
21 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 30 1,930
22 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 41 1,926
23 Romeo’s Honda Van Rob Hewer 37 1,921
24 Grievous AngelRangel Andrew Swift 29 1,917
25 Gaalacticos Colin Goulding 46 1,907
26 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 40 1,899
27 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 35 1,889
28 Below Par Paul Bentz 34 1,860
29 greensmeansbusiness adam greenwood 22 1,860
30 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 43 1,857
31 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 31 1,826
32 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 46 1,807
33 The Hardy Boys Alan Hardy 37 1,804
34 RICO UNITED JASON REACHER 40 1,803
35 Sweet Cherry Pie Jason Earwicker 51 1,781
36 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 42 1,781
37 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 43 1,771
38 Baker Bum Boys Lewis Baker 30 1,702
39 Go Buffoons Go!!! Jitesh Lakhani 27 1,699
40 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 28 1,677
41 Ciderheads Darren Pope 29 1,669
42 Bish Bosh Goal Simon Purnell 29 1,500
43 REAL JORVIK Simon Brown 38 1,476
44 BrussiaHairbach Alex Ritchie 17 1,350

 

The week that Leicester City won the league. Amazing.

Far and away our highest scorers of the week were Shoelace Untied with 78 points. The next highest scoring team didn’t even make it over 60 points. Shoelace now come into real contention for a top four prize and shouldn’t be ruled out of clinching the title given their ascent over recent weeks. The same can be said for The Kolarov Mane, who despite dropping a place this week, take the April Manager of the Month prize.

1 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 50 424
2 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 78 407
3 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 54 406
4 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 48 375
5 Init fc Mustafa khan 46 371
6 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 32 365

 

No-one could catch them once they’d posted their 190 point total in gameweek 34. It’s telling to see four of the top five in the mix for the April prize, all coming good at the right time and trying to haul Caligula back in. Caligula go into the penultimate week with a re-established 12 point lead. It’s still all to play for.

Shoelace’s outstanding week was helped massively by automatic substitutions and somewhat ironically, Sadio (The Kolarov) Mane. Squad rotation from our European semi finalists did play a part, with mixed results across the league. All three of Shoelace’s subs were used – but most notable was Sergio Aguero being replaced by Mark Noble. The West Ham captain scored two for the second consecutive week and added 16 more points to their total. Mane’s hat trick against Manchester City bagged him the player of the week award. That’s seven goals in six games without too many people realising – a run that’s accumulated 50 points.

 

Player of the week – Sadio Mane – 20 points. Coming up on the rails for Euro qualification

Bargain of the week – Karl Darlow – 15 points. A penalty save that might keep them up

Donkey of the week – Aly Cisshoko – -2 points. This should really be a Spurs player.

Goal of the week – Andros Townsend. Two contenders in four weeks.

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