Gameweek 26 results

February 12, 2019

1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
94 1666
2  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
77 1634
3  down Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
66 1624
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
59 1601
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
68 1565
6  up Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
89 1565
7  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
82 1554
8  down INIT FC
Mustafa khan
72 1550
9  same FTM
Stu Smith
68 1541
10  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
67 1525
11  up King raggg
Steven Darling
74 1518
12  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
65 1506
13  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
59 1506
14  same Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
71 1500
15  same Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
62 1490
16  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
64 1485
17  up Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
76 1462
18  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
51 1462
19  up Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
84 1460
20  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
82 1455
21  up Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
82 1454
22  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
58 1450
23  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
38 1435
24  same Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
71 1433
25  same Kompany & Co
69 1430
26  same RICO UNITED
70 1428
27  same Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
58 1402
28  same Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
49 1392
29  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
75 1382
30  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
52 1380
31  up Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
56 1377
32  down Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
53 1376
33  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
77 1374
34  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
67 1373
35  same El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
58 1367
35  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
45 1367
37  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
68 1365
38  up Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
85 1355
39  same Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
57 1353
40  up ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
77 1351
41  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
55 1351
42  up Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
75 1342
43  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
42 1337
50 1334
45  up Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
94 1328
46  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
30 1307
47  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
72 1293
48  same Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
56 1264
49  same Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
47 1242
50  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
43 1213
51  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
76 1157


Buckets Cup 1st round

There were some very closely fought games this week with ten of the sixteen being won by less than 10 points – five of those by just a 2 point margin. Ross’s Champions continue their progress by knocking out the reigning champs, Puddle Splash Van – we’re yet to have a manager retain the cup. Shoelace were knocked out in the tie of the round on 82 points – only five teams scored more points than that in the entire league this gameweek.

Top of the League – But Da Pitch Ain’t 1 – Trev Reams – 1666 points

The last two weeks have produced a bit of a change at the top. It’s still the same four teams, but the order has changed and the points spread has widened. And the teams in the chasing pack are also within shooting distance. Da Pitch have posted two 90+ scores to leap back into the top 5k in the world and build a lead of 32 points over The Craggy Islanders, who occupy their highest position of the season. Neil Madrid have dropped back after two shocking weeks of bad captain choices and a risky hokey-cokey transfer policy.

Manager of the week – Pique Blinders – Colin Goulding – 94 points (14 bps)

Pique’s match Da Pitch for points and goals this week but triumphed in the meaningless quest to be manager of the week by virtue of picking up more bonus points. It’s a score that puts them in contention for a charge at the manager of the month prize. Eight goals scored and four players collecting top bonus is a great return. Some teams will welcome the two week cup break. It might have come at the wrong time for Pique’s.

Player of the week – Raheem Sterling – Manchester City – 18 points

Pipping his hat trick scoring team mate by one point, despite scoring one less goal and one less bonus point. No less annoying for those that saw fit to dispense of City players with the prospect of what should have been a much tougher match against Chelsea and the fact they have a blank coming up next time out. City have refound their form (again) and Sterling becomes the first player to achieve a player of the week award twice this season. It’s the seventh player award for their team overall. Will they have another blip to throw the game into complete disarray again?

Bargain of the week – Chris Wood – Burnley – 13 points

Burnley look OK now. Wood and his team mate, Ashley Barnes, are in among the form strikers and look like a tempting pick for the forthcoming blank. They have five and four goals respectively in the last seven games. It’s a run that has seen them climb to relative safety in the league and they look set to continue the partnership for the foreseeable.

Twat of the week – Marcos Alonso – Chelsea – -1 points

Take your pick of the Chelsea defence. If Alonso is still stinking up your backline it’s surely now time to dispense. Worse still if you re-invested in Chelsea after they beat Huddersfield. Remember they were thumped for four by Bournemouth in the game before. The top four look so much more reliable for big priced players at the moment. Hazard could quite easily go on another six week holiday before his next big haul.

Goal of the week – Anthony Martial. At 1m31s



Gameweek 11 results

November 6, 2018

1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
50 732
2  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
52 714
3  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
87 713
4  down Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
52 687
5  up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
82 681
6  down Cookie fc
Peter Cook
58 671
7  up Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
73 671
Adam Burnett
80 670
9  same Thelma and Luiz
Trevor Gordon
75 670
10  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
60 668
11  down FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
65 667
12  down Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
69 664
13  up King raggg
Steven Darling
97 659
14  same RICO UNITED
71 646
15  down Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
65 643
16  up Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
73 626
17  up Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
79 626
18  up CAS Vampire Slayers
Mustafa khan
75 624
19  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
74 622
20  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
54 621
21  down Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
61 619
23  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
58 614
24  down FTM
Stu Smith
62 613
25  down Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
36 606
26  up Kompany & Co
63 598
27  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
57 596
28  up Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
73 593
97 591
29  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
56 591
31  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
59 589
32  down Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
47 589
33  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
56 579
34  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
60 576
35  down Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
48 575
36  down Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
50 573
37  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
71 564
38  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
46 563
39  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
51 559
40  down Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
48 558
41  down Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
33 555
42  up ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
74 553
43  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
38 539
44  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
48 534
45  same Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
61 527
46  down It’s coming home
scott mcgow
60 522
47  same Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
57 517
48  down Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
41 516
49  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
56 506
50  down Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
46 505
51  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
39 467
52  down Ross’s champions
darren frankland
38 453


Manager of the week – Queen of the North – Dorine Reacher – 97 points (7 goals)

Two managers reached a whopping 97 points this week. King Raggg climb back up to 13th with their haul. Five players posted double figure returns, with Aguero as captain, Sane as their other pointsworthy City asset, Arnautovic and Richarlison finding the net and Ben Chilwell hitting an assist and clean sheet double. Raggg’s fringe players scored slightly better, but QOTN’s big hitters hit big. As well as Richarlison’s brace, they became the first player in living memory to benefit from Alvaro Morata’s existence – and stuck the armband on Raheem Sterling. The in-form Anthony Martial added another, posting his third double figure score in four outings. QOTN climb 10 places as a result.

At the top the gap has closed. Decidedly average weeks from Da Pitch and Da Albion have let Neil Madrid in particular sneak back into close contention. And an 80+ score from 2017 champs, The Craggy Islanders, has seen them rise to their highest position of the season so far

Player of the week – Raheem Sterling – Manchester City – 21 points

More people captained Sergio Aguero this week than any other and he didn’t disappoint. Unless you also had Sterling. In which case there were 16 more points to be had with the armband. Sterling overtakes Aguero in the overall points standings as a result, moves to within two of Eden Hazard and claims the highest weekly player score for the season thus far. And he’s still only in 7% of teams, which is a very low ownership given his scoring power. Those who think he’s at risk of rotation, he’s started nine of the eleven games so far, and returned in seven of them. Those put off by the asking price might want to reconsider.

Bargain of the week – Raul Jiminez – Wolverhampton Wanderers – 12 points

Jiminez has been ticking over quite nicely as Wolves’ first choice striker scoring between 4 and 5 points a game on average. This was his highest return despite it being in a game in which they lost. He looks nailed on to start every week and although they’re not scoring loads of goals, the ones they do score generally involve him.

Twat of the week – Wesley Hoedt – Southampton – -3 points

Our first double twat of the week. Hoedt’s last appearance on the roll of dishonour came after he bundled an own goal in against Liverpool a few weeks back. Not wanting to give the Scousers an unfair advantage in the title race, he’s gone and done the same thing against Manchester City. Southampton play Chelsea in GW21.

Goal of the week – Richarlison (1st goal). His second was pretty good too.



A preamble. We’ve still not had the Manchester United v Bournemouth game. The most disorganised club in Europe it appears have left everyone hanging. Places are still to be settled at the top of the Buckets table. I suppose it’s exciting, although I don’t think there’s anything that can stop Caligula being crowned champions. They’re awaiting a score for Chris Smalling as well as a point from Aaron Cresswell who will replace Dimitri Payet once substitutions are activated.

The Kolarov Mane have climbed into second but can’t go any higher. Your Ad Here are 14 points further back with Simon Francis on the bench. Unless the Bournemouth captain gets in among the goals and keeps a clean sheet on Tuesday night, third is as high as they can hope for. That seems pretty much nailed on as Edgbaston are 25 points further back and with only Manuel Lanzini to come in after substitutions and David De Gea to play.

There is a battle for fourth. Shoelace sit in fifth, three points behind Edgbaston with Chris Smalling and Anthony Martial to play. A goal for either of those should be enough, providing of course they stay on the pitch. Or even get on the pitch in the first place. Might Van Gaal rest players now?

Unfortunately for Rocky Ba Bauer, now in 6th, it appears to be out of reach.

If Edgbaston lose the fourth place spot, they may have the May manager of the month award to fall back on. They currently lead Init FC by nine points. Init probably need Chris Smalling to score to overhaul the lead. Walking With Memphis, however, three points further back, and 12 behind Edgbaston, have Smalling, Antonio Valencia and Anthony Martial to play. LVG playing the kids might be the only thing that keeps Memphis (and Shoelace) from toppling Edgbaston.

Full weekly round up will arrive sometime Wednesday I expect.


Gameweek 13 preview

November 20, 2015

21 Nov 12:45 Watford v Man Utd
21 Nov 15:00 Chelsea v Norwich
21 Nov 15:00 Everton v Aston Villa
21 Nov 15:00 Newcastle v Leicester
21 Nov 15:00 Southampton v Stoke
21 Nov 15:00 Swansea v Bournemouth
21 Nov 15:00 West Brom v Arsenal
21 Nov 17:30 Man City v Liverpool
22 Nov 16:00 Spurs vWest Ham
23 Nov 20:00 Crystal Palace v Sunderland


We’re through a third of the season as we return from the last international break of the year. The next break in the fixtures occurs at the third round of the FA Cup after gameweek 20. That gives us eight straight weeks of uninterrupted Premier league action to concentrate on. This international break has returned it’s fair share of casualties, most notably in the Manchester United attack, with both Wayne Rooney and Anthony Martial unlikely to start against Watford.

The statistics for this game favour defensive picks. Only four of the 12 goals Watford have conceded have been at home. United and Watford have posted five 0-0 draws since the start of the season and there have been 11 0-0 draws in the Premiership in total, so they account for almost half. A depleted United attack and a strong Watford back line offer good odds on another blank scoresheet.

Unfortunately for West Ham, Dimitri Payet picked up an injury in the game before the international break, and looks likely to be out until February. Payet is the highest scoring new addition to the league and is owned by almost a quarter of all managers. It has to be time for a change. His value had increased at it’s peak by £0.8 million, although that will no doubt have dropped by the time the gameweek starts. But still, at £8 million, where he currently sits, gives enough spare change to bring in a decent replacement.

Offering even better replacement options is Alexis Sanchez. The Chilean isn’t marked as injured, but reports suggest there’s a chance he may be rested following international exertions. The bulk of Sanchez’s points were scored in a three week blast at the end of September into early October. Since then – nothing of note. Arsenal’s injury problems have forced Sanchez into having to play virtually every minute, but it’s been the considerably cheaper Mesut Ozil, Santi Cazorla and Olivier Giroud who have been supplying the firepower for the Gunners. It’s a risk to drop a player that will almost certainly get some gametime, but he’s so far down the midfielder form charts that it might have to be something worth considering. Every midfielder is cheaper than him, and most of them are scoring more points than him.

In the week where everybody – well Leicester fans at least – will have wanted to make Jamie Vardy their captain, it might be best avoided. Vardy comes into the gameweek rated as doubtful. The Newcastle defence will probably be hoping he doesn’t start. It may be the case that he was rested from international duty in midweek to give him every chance of being able to start. But dare you risk handing him the armband for him to not be in the squad or at best on the bench? I’d still back him to score…a 90th minute consolation.


Gameweek 7 preview

September 24, 2015

26 Sep 12:45 Spurs v Man City
26 Sep 15:00 Leicester v Arsenal
26 Sep 15:00 Liverpool v Aston Villa
26 Sep 15:00 Man Utd v Sunderland
26 Sep 15:00 Southampton v Swansea
26 Sep 15:00 Stoke v Bournemouth
26 Sep 15:00 West Ham v Norwich
26 Sep 17:30 Newcastle v Chelsea
27 Sep 16:00 Watford v Crystal Palace
28 Sep 20:00 West Brom v Everton


There are two stand out fixtures promising bucket loads of points this week. Both involve the two North Eastern teams propping up the division with Newcastle hosting Chelsea and Sunderland travelling to Old Trafford.

I’m not suggesting Chelsea’s early season wobbles are a thing of the past, but up against the league’s lowest scorers the champions should see this as an ideal opportunity to re balance their goal difference and potentially climb in to the top half of the table. They’ve won their last three games, scoring 10 and conceding only one goal. They will have to do it without Diego Costa who did get the ban he probably deserved following his shenanigans against Arsenal last week, but given the ineptness of Newcastle’s defence, they could probably get away with only turning out 10 men, or fielding Kerry Dixon. Or David Mellor. There’s instantly a case for re-employing some of those Chelsea players you probably booted out over the last few weeks. *Not Kerry Dixon – he’s retired – and is in jail*

Sunderland must travel to play a United side who have started to find the back of net more regularly. Its three goals in each of their last three games. And it’s four in four for Anthony Martial, whose come through the ‘FPL let’s wait and see’ stage with flying colours. Time to buy – as many people already have. His value has increased by £0.3 million, and against many people’s expectations, actually looks like he might be worth the £89,847,394,654,329,524 billion United paid for him. Last week’s highest scoring Buckets team, Upper Bullens, had him in their line-up.

Both United and Chelsea comfortably won their midweek League cup encounters. Both Newcastle and Sunderland lost miserably. Newcastle to lower league opposition at home, and Sunderland convincingly to City – also at home. Confidence is not high among Tyne and Wear football fans at the moment.

The two best performing goalkeepers come face to face on Monday night. Boaz Myhill continues to impress in the absence of Ben Foster at West Brom. Four clean sheets and six bonus points put him just ahead of Tim Howard, who has three clean sheets and four bonus points. Myhilll is the cheaper at £4.6 million, and with no sign of Foster returning to the starting eleven, is clearly one of the best value players across the game. Of West Brom’s next five games up until the end of October, Monday night’s fixture against Everton looks the trickiest on paper. But then games against Palace, Sunderland, Norwich and Leicester could yield yet more clean sheet points for the Baggies keeper.

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