Gameweek 24 and January Manager of the Month results

The week (or fortnight) in which it all changed. Liverpool’s double gameweek. Probably not their last of the season but that didn’t stop the majority of us and the rest of the world jumping on the prospect of some massive scores from the runaway Premier League leaders, particularly in their match against West Ham. Some major transfer activity ensued. Can we squeeze in three Reds players? It was a move made easier by timely injuries to Jamie Vardy and Marcus Rashford. And then the triple captains started landing. You had a choice, depending on the make up of your team and your propensity for a bit of gambling, of sticking it on one of six players – two obvious and four hipster. There shouldn’t have been a massive amount of difference between picking Mo Salah and Sadio Mane. Stats would suggest that both would return something. Roberto Firmino carried slightly more risk, but this is the guy that only scores in away games. He could be the key to a sneaky rank rise if the majority banked on the other two. Or dare you captain a defender? TAA, Robertson and Van Dijk are virtual ever-presents in the middle of an astounding run of clean-sheet shenanigans. Add to that the full-backs’ assist potential.

270,000 managers compared to 220,000 opted for Mane over Salah as their triple captain. The split in the top 100 was 40 to 39 in favour of the Senegalese. Over a million compared to 940,000 went with the standard captain choice on Mane. Selecting Sadio Mane WAS NOT A BAD IDEA. Keep telling yourself that. In the end the best choice was Jordan Henderson, who equaled Salah’s score, but at well under half the price. 

So, selecting Salah would have got you 48 points to Mane’s 3, and it’s pretty easy, scanning the Buckets league to pick out those that went with the former over the latter. That 45 point difference is evident in a lot of scores. Most notably, right at the top. We have new leaders, and instantly by some distance. Game Of Stones got it right. Locky Bauer Bowyer did not.

Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
Locky Bauer Bowyer
Paul Hawkins
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
Stephen Papadopoulos
Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
Sterling Silva
Tim Dodd
Micheal Dinneen

Considering what was expected of the week, the scores were, on the whole, a bit underwhelming. The average was a disappointing 55 points. But for the Liverpool v West Ham game, in which Salah’s haul and the clean sheet justified the non-Mane captainers selections, the rest of the week was pretty soul-destroying. Southampton and Burnley returned unexpected clean sheets, Everton lost one in the final minute to a Florian Lejeune double. I mean, we all saw that one coming didn’t we? There was a Leicester goal blitz but with no involvement from either Vardy or Maddison – and then they conceded. Most teams are littered with one and two point hauls plus whatever Liverpool returns you managed.

Our top scorers were FTM and Chef Utd. Both hit 89 points. FTM win the place on the honours board courtesy of the four goals they scored to Chef Utd’s two. To contradict everything I’ve just said about the gameweek, they only relied on two Liverpool assets and got pretty good returns out of the rest of their squad. They could even afford to have a 10 point Jorginho haul sat on their bench. They become the first three-time manager of the week winners this season.

Manager of the month went to The Craggy Islanders. Despite the contrasting scores and fortunes of a lot of teams in the league, the standings didn’t alter much from last week to this. Most of those in contention posted scores in the 70s and 80s, suggesting they all got their double gameweek picks just about right. The Islanders triple captained Salah.

The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
Alisson Wonderland
Scott Denyer
Tim Dodd
Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
Stephen Papadopoulos
Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton

The Buckets Cup starts next gameweek. So if you’re cursing your Mane luck, put that behind you and focus on the cup. To confirm, the three teams with a bye to the second round are The Craggy Islanders, as last years winners, and Cook Pass Babtridge and Locky Bauer Bowyer as the two highest weekly scores so far this season. Check the cup link for the draw. Also, it’s worth mentioning that the Last Man Standing competition is now past half way. We have 30 teams left. Nine of our current top ten remain, with Edgbaston being a casualty in GW18. Ren n White, currently in 59th place, are the lowest team still (just about) standing. Check that link to see if you’re still there. 


January manager of the month – Adrian Roche – The Craggy Islanders – 271 points

Manager of the week – Stu Smith – FTM – 89 points (4 goals)

Player of the week – Jordan Henderson – Liverpool – 16 points

Bargain of the week – Florian Lejeune – Newcastle United – 14 points

Twat of the week – David Luiz – Arsenal – -3 points

Goal of the week – Jay Rodriguez

Gameweek 4 and August Manager of the Month

The Mindless Morons have hung on. And by a safe distance. And by doing something that no other fantasy player has ever done – gaining from points scored by Jordan Ayew. The Morons have a lot to thank Palace for. Aswell as Ayew, PVA pulled in another clean sheet, a score that’s taken him to the top of the defender charts. Sergio Aguero and, at last, a clean sheet from Andy Robertson, were the other notable contributors. Sergio’s price has risen. It’s amazing it’s taken so long for him to increase his value by £0.1 million, given he’s the game’s current top scorer and has returned in every gameweek.

The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
58 269
Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
65 259
Cook Pass Babtridge
Marcus Baker
51 259
FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
57 252
Tim Dodd
78 250
The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
73 249
Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
73 245
Kante fit my Willian
Paul Callaghan
73 245
Micheal Dinneen
53 244
Sterling Silva
70 241

It was another bumper week for goals and although clean sheets were thin on the ground again, City and Liverpool shut their opponents out, so Buckets back lines contributed more than in the first three weeks. Those who kept patience with the likes of TAA, Robertson, Zinchenko etc have finally got their reward.  It was a high average score as a result and the 87 points posted by Rip Roaring Reds was the best of the week. The Reds prospered due to 51 points from their City assets, and another player finally coming good, Youri Tielemans. There’ll be more to follow from him as well you’d expect.

August Manager of the Month – John Seacroft – The Mindless Morons – 269 points

Manager of the week – Sean Whyton – Rip Roaring Reds – 87 points

Player of the week – Jamie Vardy – Leiciester City – 16 points

Bargain of the week – Arthur Masuaku – West Ham United – 12 points

Twat of the week – Trezeguet – Aston Villa – -2 points

Goal of the week – Jamie Vardy. Reminded me of 2015/16.

Gameweek 28 results and February Manager of the Month

1  same But Da Pitch Ain’t 1
Trev Reams
54 1750
2  same The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
66 1748
3  same Perfidious Albion
Andrew Swift
78 1738
4  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
65 1699
5  same Bielsa Ringing
Alan Hardy
63 1681
6  up INIT FC
Mustafa khan
71 1647
7  same FTM
Stu Smith
58 1641
8  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
46 1639
9  same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
43 1600
10  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
64 1600
11  down King raggg
Steven Darling
37 1590
12  down Frostee Rucker
Paul Bentz
41 1588
13  down Deeney in a Bottle
Stephanie Cripps
50 1588
14  up Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
62 1579
15  down Game of Stones
Ryan Garoghan
39 1560
16  same SLABHEAD FC
Adam Burnett
63 1557
17  up Aribo Haribo
Paul Hawkins
49 1552
18  down Fake Madrid
Andrew Wade
46 1551
73 1549
20  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
47 1541
21  down Mour Salt and Pep
Noel Driver
43 1538
22  down Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
46 1524
23  same Dinamo Spinks
David Spinks
57 1523
24  same Cookie fc
Peter Cook
50 1510
25  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
79 1503
26  down Kompany & Co
38 1496
27  down Musttryharder fc
Paul Telford
46 1489
28  up Salah Buffoon!!!
Jitesh Lakhani
60 1479
29  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
50 1470
30  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
50 1470
31  down Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
48 1470
32  up The Big Lewandowski
Paul Callaghan
53 1469
33  down PenshawPerformers
david bruce
52 1468
34  same Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
49 1462
35  up Crazy Leg XI
David Caldicott
70 1460
84 1456
37  down Need son luck
Matt Jarvis
44 1456
38  down El Loco No Joko
Paul Murray
43 1454
39  down Morningblues
Jeff Morning
54 1445
40  down Hemel Hotspurs
Paul Jarvis
35 1440
41  down romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
37 1429
42  same Pique Blinders
Colin Goulding
58 1423
43  down ClipityKlopptotitle
tanya thursby
38 1419
44  up Hoose Reus
James Whitfield
58 1405
45  up Greeeenteeam
adam greenwood
67 1397
46  down Dropit like its Hart
Jason Earwicker
28 1394
47  same It’s coming home
scott mcgow
69 1383
48  same Puddle Splash Van
Ian Williams
53 1327
49  same The Mindless Morons
John Seacroft
51 1295
50  same Ross’s champions
darren frankland
62 1241


Top of the league – But Da Pitch Ain’t 1 – Trev Reams – 1750 points

Da Pitch still hold the lead, but it’s only a slender two points over the surging Craggy Islanders who are on the hunt for the second title. Perfidious sit third and only ten points further back after a resurgent week, and although not completely out of touch and out of contention for the title, Neil Madrid and Bielsa Ringing will need near perfect run-ins to catch those sides ahead of them. And we probably shouldn’t rule out the possibility of INIT, FTM or Shoelace sneaking into fourth place. We’re entering silly season, as the blank and double gameweeks begin to form and chip tactics come into play. We’re faced with only five fixtures in GW31 and the likelihood of a similar figure in GW33, depending on the outcome of the next round of the FA Cup. Already Manchester United have had two of their fixtures rearranged and moved to the middle of gameweeks 32 and 35. Expect the other successful cup teams to see their fixtures moved to the same midweek slots. Of the leading contenders, The Craggy Islanders, Perfidious Albion, Neil Madrid and Bielsa Ringing have all of their chips and their wildcard remaining. Da Pitch just have their chips to play. FTM Have their wildcard but bench-boosted in GW10, whereas INIT have no wildcards or triple captain and Shoelace have no wildcards or free hit. Negotiating the next few weeks could be tricky without at least one of the wildcard or free hit still in the bag. And it shouldn’t all be about the leaders, as a perfectly played strategy of wildcards and chips could hand any team anywhere in the league any of the next three manager of the month awards. It might also be something the semi-finalists of the Buckets Cup want to consider…

Buckets Cup quarter finals

Although maybe not in the case of The Craggy Islanders or Neil Madrid who probably have their eyes on a bigger prize. And that may play into the hands of Fake Madrid and Kebab Eaters who are the other two teams to progress to the last four. The Islanders beat Da Pitch as Madrid saw off FTM in the two top ten clashes. The Islanders will play Fake Madrid, who beat El Loco No Joko, who inexplicably kept Virgil Van Dyk and Sergio Aguero on the bench?!?!?!? Kebab Eaters edged past Mour Salt and Pep to face Neil Madrid. It could be a Madrid derby final.

February manager of the month – Atletico Chappers – Richard Chapman – 309 points

Thanks to their top 2,000 in the world weekly score of GW27 and consolidating with a steady 50 pointer this week, Chappers pinch the February prize. I’m not sure they were really in it at all before hitting the dizzy heights at the weekend. They have Gerard Deulefeu to thank and did so by benching him for their hammering at the hands of Liverpool last night.

Manager of the week – Queen Of The North – Dorine Reacher – 84 points

A week for defenders this week and QOTN lined up two of the big scorers – Schar and Robertson – in their team. They amassed 43 points from those two and their other defender, Ashley Young, who chipped in with a goal, and their keeper, Allison. They wouldn’t be picking up this award however had it not been for a Marko Arnautovic no-show. Although quite what Sadio Mane was doing warming the bench is anyone’s guess given his present run of form of six goals in six games.

Player of the week – Virgil Van Dyk – Liverpool – 20 points

It would have been 51 points had Van Dyk been lined alongside them in a triple up Liverpool defence. It’s not a ludicrous idea given that they’re three of the six highest scoring defenders in the game and that Liverpool have more clean sheets than anyone else so far this season. They could surpass 20 which would be a great achievement. It bodes well for the weeks ahead in which Liverpool play every week. They have no doubles, but they also have no blanks.

Bargain of the week – Fabian Schar – Newcastle United – 15 points

There aren’t many players with two weekly player awards so far this season. Fabian Schar is probably the most unexpected recipient. A clean sheet and a wondergoal always equals top bonus. Newcastle will play the blank gameweek in 31, and have other potential clean sheet matches between now and then.

Twat of the week – Kieran Trippier – Tottenham Hotspur – -1 points

A wonderful own goal that totally wrong footed Hugo Lloris, a World Cup winning captain no less. Tottenham’s meltdown might have started a few weeks earlier this season.

Goal of the week – Fabian Schar.

Gameweek 38 results and May manager of the month

May Manager of the Month – Pretty Schitty City – Alex Michaluk – 188 points

Not a bad two weeks work for PSC scoring almost as much as the leading manager for August and October, both of which were three gameweek months. Having a double gameweek and the usually bonkers final gameweek always helps provide a high score. Their monthly triumph has been largely helped by a mini-resurgence in Leicester’s fortunes and Mahrez and Vardy posting big scores for the final two weeks. Leicester aren’t on the beach anymore. They’ve been on holiday and come back.

1  up Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
85 188
2  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
88 180
3  down It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
66 178
4  down Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
54 170
5  same Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
58 160
6  up Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
84 160
6  up Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
67 160

Manager of the week – Your Ad Here – Matthew Hopkins – 88 points

YAH finished second in the May table trailing PSC by eight points. They opted to wildcard in GW36 and bench boost in GW37, probably with one eye on pushing for the last available monthly award, and maybe the highest weekly score prize too. Their week winning score came without Mo Salah, but with equally as effective contributions from four end-of-season form horses, Marko Arnautovic, Wilfried Zaha, Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang and Ayoze Perez. All backed up a long overdue Harry Kane brace, but weren’t quite enough to pinch the monthly award.

Player of the week – Andrew Robertson – 18 points

A goal, assist, clean sheet and top bonus marks. The full house from the Liverpool full back was matched by Patrick Van Aanholt for Palace, but Robertson did it all for £0.2 million less. It makes all the difference. He’ll be much sought after next season.

Bargain of the week – Ayoze Perez – 13 points

Ending the season with a flourish, this is Perez’s second bargain player award in the last two months and his third double figure score in the same period. It was achieved with his fifth and sixth goals in his last eight games. And he’s meant to be on the beach.

Twat of the week – Christian Fuchs – -2 points

Scoring an own goal in the craziest scoring game of the day was never going to help anyone hoping to keep their head above water. Fuchs dipped into the minus scores after a shot destined for a thrown-in rebounded off his knee and into the net. Leicester defenders have been a no go area all season, much like they always have been, even when they’re winning the league.

Goal of the week – Kelechi Iheanacho. 1m47s