Gameweek 34 results

April 21, 2016

Sorry. Virtually impossible for me to write a complete update this week I’m afraid. The Premier League thought it’d be a good idea to stretch this round of fixtures out to Thursday evening, giving me no time at all from the results being published to cover everything, in what has probably been the highest scoring gameweek since records began. Gameweek 31 of the 2013/14 season saw all of a 26 team Buckets League score over 100 points. Early signs are at least that amount will hit triple figures this week.

The Kolarov Mane have probably posted the highest score – a mammoth 190 points – scoring 14 goals. That makes them the current holders of the highest weekly score prize, blitzing Romeo’s 126 points from gameweek 8. What had become a two horse race for the title has now opened up to include, potentially, another four teams. Maybe more. Not forgetting there’s another one of these double gameweeks on the horizon in GW37. Who knows who might come into contention then. It’s fair to say a few team’s seasons have ended with this week’s scores as well.

Lots of chips were played to great effect. Sergio Aguero and Alexis Sanchez were the popular triple captain choices and both did the business. Aguero narrowly beat Sanchez to the highest weekly player score by a point. His 26 points is the highest of the season. Those that triple captained Aguero picked up a massive 78 points from him alone. No higher score has ever appeared against a players name for a weeks work. And there were loads of other impressive displays.

Heurelho Gomes saved two penalties and kept a clean sheet to score 19 points from Watford’s game against West Brom. He added another two points from their second fixture. That must be the highest weekly score for a keeper. Many gambled on Manchester United defenders, although not necessarily Antonio Valencia and Matteo Darmian, who added either goal, assist or bonus points to their clean sheets. Four – count them – FOUR Newcastle players posted double figure scores. Jamaal Lascelles was the bargain buy of the week. And even those that couldn’t field a team full of double gameweekers had the Tottenham express to fall back on. Harry Kane, Dele Alli and Christian Eriksen only need one game to hit double figures.

I hope to post the complete table before it disappears at the start of the next gameweek. I’ll be spending most of tomorrow urging my daughter to hurry up and get born so I can do that.


Player of the week – Sergio Aguero – 26 points. Most of which came against Chelsea, not Newcastle.

Bargain of the week – Jamaal Lascelles – 16 points. Too little too late.

Donkey of the week – Thibault Courtois – -1 points. Second red card and second time donkey.

Goal of the week – Aaron Cresswell. 


1 FC Caligula Ajay Supeda 166 2,065
2 Your Ad Here Matthew Hopkins 148 2,046
3 The Kolarov Mané Trevor Gordon 190 2,019
4 Rocky Ba Bauer P Hawkins 154 2,012
5 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 172 1,978
6 Golden Boys Stephanie Cripps 145 1,966
7 Edgbaston Micheal Dinneen 157 1,953
8 Game of Throw ins Darren Lavelle 147 1,946
9 Atlético Chappers Richard Chapman 108 1,934
10 Sergio Five O DEAN CRIPPS 132 1,931
11 4 Lime Jellies Ian Williams 131 1,919
12 Bicuitmen Chris Morton 137 1,894
13 JonniestaRedmondinho David Spinks 137 1,894
14 Init fc Mustafa khan 139 1,888
15 Walking with Memphis Noel Driver 112 1,881
16 SS3 FC Paul Murray 98 1,876
17 The Craggy Islanders Adrian Roche 136 1,864
18 Grievous AngelRangel Andrew Swift 67 1,861
19 scotty2hotty scott mcgow 129 1,859
20 Howayman Mark Bromham 113 1,852
21 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 156 1,848
22 Romeo’s Honda Van Rob Hewer 111 1,848
23 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 61 1,844
24 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 90 1,838
25 Gaalacticos Colin Goulding 91 1,828
26 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 111 1,816
27 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 115 1,809
28 greensmeansbusiness adam greenwood 70 1,804
29 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 101 1,787
30 Below Par Paul Bentz 82 1,775
31 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 138 1,757
32 The Hardy Boys Alan Hardy 86 1,739
34 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 114 1,721
35 Sweet Cherry Pie Jason Earwicker 117 1,713
36 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 52 1,700
37 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 79 1,684
38 Baker Bum Boys Lewis Baker 49 1,628
39 Go Buffoons Go!!! Jitesh Lakhani 118 1,621
40 Crazy Legs XI David Caldicott 105 1,616
41 Ciderheads Darren Pope 107 1,608
42 Bish Bosh Goal Simon Purnell 61 1,427
43 REAL JORVIK Simon Brown 120 1,407
44 BrussiaHairbach Alex Ritchie 68 1,288


There you go – all a bit back to front this weekend. The site says that it’s still updating – I guess there’s a lot to update. Although I’m pretty sure this table is correct. We’ve 30 teams that have made it passed 100 points.

I might have jumped the gun on suggesting it was more than a two horse race. Caligula and Your Ad Here still look the most likely winners. Rocky Ba Bauer had taken over at the top by end of play on Sunday. Caligula and YAH’s Arsenal contingent came good on Thursday evening to propel them back out in front. The Kolarov Mane have hit their highest position. They have the momentum. They’re way out in front in the April manager of the month race. Shoelace posted the second highest score and find themselves in their highest league position just at the right time. It was a bad week for Atletico Chappers who have dropped out of contention, and GrievousAngelRangel, who were 40 points behind fourth place last week, but only managed 67 points this week to fall 140 points behind.



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