Gameweek 34 results

April 30, 2015

1 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 71 1,940
2 Pescara Rangers Stewart Pope 73 1,905
3 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 66 1,898
4 RayCrawfordsCrackers Rob Hewer 60 1,855
5 NaboombuDirtyYellows Andrew Swift 50 1,850
6 Shoelace Untied Caroline Strong 69 1,849
7 * Your Ad Here * Matthew Hopkins 72 1,846
8 Uriah Rennie 2nd XI Neil Greenwood 60 1,824
9 Upper Bullens Andy Taylor 52 1,818
10 Gaalatcticos Colin Goulding 57 1,810
11 Van Damme United P Hawkins 64 1,799
12 Bermie Utd Glen Davies 56 1,770
13 Ciderheads Darren Pope 49 1,767
14 Accrington Rudyard Ian Williams 58 1,745
15 Pretty Schitty City Alex Michaluk 80 1,741
16 Paris Spinks Germain David Spinks 65 1,740
17 Who R U DEAN CRIPPS 55 1,733
18 Biscuitmen Chris Morton 59 1,730
19 Rip Roaring Reds Sean Whyton 61 1,699
20 The Mindless Morons John Seacroft 53 1,692
21 Panza Grande XI Stuart Baker 55 1,667
22 Get to the choppa Mark Bromham 58 1,650
23 Real Jorvik FC Simon Brown 68 1,615
24 Luxembourg United Simon Smallbone 72 1,610
25 No Recognized Plan Paul Bentz 45 1,585
26 Sportingabiggerwig Alex Ritchie 57 1,574
27 Release The Hounds Paul Mitchell 64 1,557
28 Crazylegs XI David Caldicott 51 1,500
29 Jordie’s Giants Jordan Raper 39 1,217


Well that gameweek didn’t exactly live up to it’s expectations. Calculate a mini league out of the four teams playing twice and you’d unexpectedly have Hull at the top and frustratingly for most of us, find Liverpool at the bottom. The average score worldwide was only 52 points. In most double gameweeks the majority of managers are normally pushing 100. I suspect that if we’d all taken a punt on a few more Hull players maybe some of the 60’s and 70’s that were prevalent among Buckets managers would have been transformed into 80’s and 90’s. No-one would have predicted that the top scoring players of the week would be Michael Dawson and Steve Harper. No-one did. Probably anywhere other than Hull. There were seven clean sheets from the six matches involving Chelsea, Leicester, Hull and Liverpool – including two 0-0 draws. Whereas we expect to see midfielders and attackers prosper over double gameweeks, this time it was defenders and goalies on top.

Our manager of the week was Pretty Schitty City. PSC went the Chelsea Leicester route. Cahill and Terry managed double figure scores from a clean sheet each, a goal and assist between them, and a couple of bonus marks (for Terry). Cesc Fabregas picked up eight points courtesy of one assist in the Leicester match. Their best player was Jamie Vardy. Vardy was a popular cheeky alternative on the captain front and didn’t disappoint. He contributed 24 of PSC’s 80 points. Eden Hazard returned a fairly measly 5 points, and only Martin Skrtel made it out of double figures for Liverpool.

Second highest score of the week was a 73 by Pescara Rangers and that was enough to secure April manager of the month. It was never really in doubt. Pescara could have scored as low as the high 50’s and still nicked the award.

1 Pescara Rangers Stewart Pope 73 282
2 Van Damme United P Hawkins 64 266
3 RayCrawfordsCrackers Rob Hewer 60 262
4 Hedgehog Corpse FC Nick Smith 66 254
5 Neil Madrid Neil Strong 71 251
6 * Your Ad Here * Matthew Hopkins 72 241


Pescara’s 73 didn’t really close much of a gap on Neil Madrid at the top. It did lift them back into second place over Hedgehog’s, but other than that all of the top 11 teams remain in the same position as they were last week.


Player of the week – Michael Dawson – 21 points. Scoring half as many points again as he already had.

Bargain of the week – Steve Harper – 19 points. More than doubling his total.

Donkey of the week – Charlie Austin – -1 points. A crucial missed penalty

Goal of the week – Ramires. Shit week on the goal front too. 


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