August 22, 2017

1  up Hornets
Andrew Wade
80 142
2  up Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
47 132
3  up The winnings R mine
david bruce
55 130
4  up Rico united
JASON REACHER
52 129
5  up Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
50 129
6  up romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
48 126
7  up Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
63 126
8  down Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
36 124
9  up Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
63 123
9  up Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
54 123
11  up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
50 122
12  down Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
38 122
13  up Queen of the north
DORINE REACHER
60 121
14  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
45 119
15  up Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
51 118
16  down INIT FC
Mustafa khan
26 112
17  down It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
42 110
17  down Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
40 110
19  down Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
28 108
20  down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
31 108
21  up Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
46 107
22  down King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
35 107
22  up Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
52 107
24  down Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
41 106
25  up Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
43 103
26  up Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
47 102
27  down Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
35 100
28  down mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
40 100
29  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
40 99
30  up FTM
Stu Smith
47 97
31  up Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
45 96
32  down disco dancer
darren frankland
36 94
32  down cookster fc
Peter Cook
29 94
34  up Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
47 94
35  same The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
42 93
36  down The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
32 93
37  up Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
43 92
38  up To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
47 91
39  down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
36 88
40  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
38 88
41  up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
39 84
42  down Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
40 83
43  down musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
29 79
44  up iamgroot
scott mcgow
40 78
45  down blakes11
Steven Darling
36 77
46  down Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
44 75
47  up Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
36 73
48  same Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
27 68
49  down We are Ayling
Paul Murray
21 67
50  same Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
19 47

 

Manager of the week – Hornets – 80 points

Straight to the top of the league and in pole position for the first manager of the month prize go league newcomers, Hornets. Player of the week, Marcos Alonso, top scored, with added double figure totals courtesy of our goal of the week scorer, Aaron Mooy, and Paul Pogba and Romelu Lukaku. Pogba, along with Henrik Mkhitaryan, are top of the midfielder points, and at long last making those transfer fees seem worthwhile. Lukaku, meanwhile, isn’t wasting any time. He’s the most selected and was the most captained this gameweek.

Player of the week – Marcos Alonso – 16 points

Hopefully there weren’t too many kneejerk reactions to Cheslea’s poor showing against Burnley last week. Alonso has very quickly reminded us why he’s the most expensive defender, by basically playing as an attacker, and curling in a trademark beauty of a free kick. Harry Kane got booked again. How many kneejerk reactions will there be to his crap start? Surely next week against Burnley is where he finally makes his mark on the season?

Bargain of the week – Harry Maguire – 15 points

Leicester look far more capable of scoring and keeping clean sheets already than at any point last season. Scoring and keeping a clean sheet is exactly what Maguire did. He seems to have cemented his starting berth although three tough fixtures in the next four await.

Twat of the week – Kyle Walker – -2 points

And if you did kneejerk away from the Chelsea defence, lets hope you didn’t plump for Kyle Walker.

Goal of the week – Aaron Mooy 

No vid. disgraceful

Gamewwwek 1 results

August 13, 2017

1  new Fun Lovren Criminals
Paul Callaghan
88 88
2  new INIT FC
Mustafa khan
86 86
3  new Crazylegs XI
David Caldicott
85 85
4  new Despicable Mee
Trevor Gordon
84 84
5  new Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
80 80
6  new Aquamar 1564
Noel Driver
79 79
7  new romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
78 78
7  new Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
78 78
9  new Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
77 77
9  new Rico united
JASON REACHER
77 77
11  new The winnings R mine
david bruce
75 75
12  new FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
72 72
12  new King Dunlap
Paul Bentz
72 72
14  new Gotta Light?
Andrew Swift
70 70
15  new Klopp of the Pochs
Jason Earwicker
69 69
16  new It’sOnlyAGameFarke!
David Spinks
68 68
17  new Nashton Villa
Jaime Nash
67 67
18  new cookster fc
Peter Cook
65 65
18  new Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
65 65
18  new Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
65 65
21  new mrs mcgoo
laura barrett
64 64
22  new Brexiter City
Colin Goulding
63 63
23  new Hornets
Andrew Wade
62 62
24  new The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
61 61
24  new Queen of the north
DORINE REACHER
61 61
24  new Flying squad
Matt Jarvis
61 61
27  new Pure Buffoonery!
Jitesh Lakhani
60 60
27  new Kompany & Co
DEAN CRIPPS
60 60
29  new Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
59 59
30  new disco dancer
darren frankland
58 58
31  new Bakerlona FC
Stuart Baker
55 55
31  new Game of Throw-Ins
Ryan Garoghan
55 55
33  new musttryharder FC
Paul Telford
54 54
34  new Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
52 52
35  new The Vinegar Pissers
P Hawkins
51 51
35  new Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
51 51
35  new Emergency Gap Jumper
Ian Williams
51 51
38  new greenyteamy
adam greenwood
50 50
38  new FTM
Stu Smith
50 50
40  new Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
49 49
41  new Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
47 47
41  new Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
47 47
43  new We are Ayling
Paul Murray
46 46
44  new Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
45 45
44  new blakes11
Steven Darling
45 45
46  new To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
44 44
47  new iamgroot
scott mcgow
42 42
48  new Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
41 41
49  new Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
37 37
50  new Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
32 32

 

Manager of the week –  Fun Lovren Criminals – 88 points.

It happens so often that the last game of the weekend saves a gameweek. Romelu Lukaku’s 13 point haul, doubled to 26 with the armband, was the score that took Fun Lovren Criminals to the Buckets summit for week one and win them the first manager of the week accolade. Lukaku and Harry Kane vied for top ownership and top captain choice for this opening round of fixtures. Those opting for the United forward reaped the rewards. Kane lovers had the added disappointment of seeing their man booked, and thus picking up a measly two points as skipper. Impressive Premier League club debuts from Mohamed Salah, Alexandre Lacazette and Sead Kolasinac also contributed to FLC’s early lead, and the performance of all of those four players in particular bodes well for their fantasy careers.

Player of the week – Ahmed Hegazi – 15 points.

Best debut of the lot came from West Brom’s new Egyptian centre back, Ahmed Hegazi. Tony Pulis should just play a 1-10-0-0 and be done with it. No need for attackers. Don’t be surprised if a defender ends up as West Brom’s top scorer this season. Keep 13 clean sheets, score five or six goals, get to 40 points in March, start planning your holidays. Easy.

Bargain of the week – Sam Vokes – 13 points.                                                               Twat of the week – Gary Cahill – -3 points

Week one is never without it’s surprise results. Burnley sold their main striker the evening before. Their away record last season was shocking. Chelsea, the Champions, only lost twice at home last season, kept 16 clean sheets and beat their opponents 3-0 almost a year ago. When it goes tits up in week one it feels so much worse than at any other time of the season, probably because you’ve been aching over your selection since mid July. But no-one could have seen this coming. Although, as much as I don’t see Sam Vokes clogging up too many forward lines, I also don’t see too many Chelsea defenders in any of our squads either. Are they priced too highly? Shoelace however, who are propping us all up, were unfortunate enough to plump for Cahill. But for Lukaku, and a scoring start from Sergio Aguero, mid to low priced strikers came out on top. As well as Vokes, honorable mentions should go to Steve Mounie and some bloke called Wayne Rooney.

Goal of the week – Wayne Rooney.

Lets start with a cracking header – 1m06s.

 

 

 

Season preview

August 10, 2017

The blog is going to look a little different this season. I’m going back to school. Literally. I decided I had it in me to train to become a teacher. It takes most youthful, energetic, ambitious and enthusiastic people three years. I’m going to do it all in one. At least that’s the plan. Its going to be an intense year. I wasn’t even sure I was going to enter a team, never mind run the league, but as soon as they published the player lists I couldn’t help but put a squad together. And it looked pretty good. Then the rest of you started signing up.

So – the league survives. Yet, I won’t have the time to update quite so much and quite as regularly. My aim is to produce a results round-up after each gameweek. From the end of August through the first weeks of September it might feel like I’ve disappeared completely. I haven’t. I’m just moving house. Just bear with me round that time until I get my set up…set up.

Last season was our most competitive yet. This season could be even better. We’ve lost a lot of non-starters from previous seasons. Separated the wheat from the chaff. We’re a very wheaty league. Full of proper fantasy players who take this shit seriously.

We’ve 49 teams at the minute. I’ve updated the cup and prize money links based on this. We may get one or two more entrants and I’ll alter accordingly if we do. Anyway, you can check out what you could win and when. Check out December. And when the cup starts, and how you achieve yourself a bye into the 1st round proper.

There’s a new chip to contemplate and then play in a blind panic in GW37. The ‘free hit’ replaces the fairly pointless ‘all out attack’. With it, you’re able to make unlimited free transfers for a single gameweek. Then, for the next gameweek, you’re squad reverts back to the line up you had before you played the chip. When to play? Dunno. Haven’t figured that out yet. It could work in any number of situations – if you play it right. Hope that helps. Bench boost and triple captain remain. As do the two wildcards – one for the first half of the season and another for the second half of the season. I’ve tried my best to explain the rules of our league (and cup) on the relevant pages. Any questions, please ask.

Good luck for the season ahead. Good luck squeezing those wing backs in. And picking the right cheap midfielder. And the right striking combo. At the head of the right formation. For the right amount of weeks before wildcard time. Good luck.

End of season results

May 23, 2017

up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
85 2315
down When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
80 2312
same Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
77 2274
up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
110 2255

The Craggy Islanders are our champions. By three points. I think that might be our closest finish yet. It was looking at one point, before the bonuses came in, that it might end up being a tie. I’m glad it wasn’t. I didn’t fancy the season long count back of goals scored. The Islanders won the last weekly battle 85 to 80 – the five point gap enough to take over at the top. WHMA played the All Out Attack, but to no avail. It wouldn’t have made a difference had they not bothered.

The Islanders started this season as our first manager of the week and then spent most of the next three months coming and going, in and out of the top 10. They hit a century in gameweek 14 climbing back to the summit. From that moment on they never left the top four, clinging on to first for six weeks between 16 and 22, and then next appearing in top spot when it really mattered – gameweek 38.

Meaning When Harry Met Alli must settle for second place for the second successive year. They were always in the mix. They never dropped out of the top 10 but for one week in December. From the turn of the year they took up residence in the top four and never fell below that. They were at the head of the group of teams trying to peg back Aquamar through the last third of the season, managing to take the lead in gameweek 37. Perhaps their decision to play their bench boost a week earlier than The Islanders cost them the title. We’ll never know.

And we’ll never know whether Aquamar’s itchy transfer finger cost them the top prize. Sitting in the top 3,000 worldwide in gameweek 32 with an 80 point lead over their nearest Buckets challenger, they went on a complete transfer bender making 19 in the last six weeks. Not having Harry Kane to play out the final two weeks, however, was probably the biggest handicap. It was a season of what might have been for Aquamar, also finishing runners-up in the Buckets Cup to Shoelace Untied.

Fourth place was a battle to the death with five or so teams continuously changing places over the closing two months of the season. Kebab Eaters United eventually pipped Edgbaston to the last cash prize. Edgbaston finished fifth last year too, but do take home the prize for the May manager of the month and the highest weekly score – a record breaking 181 points in gameweek 37.

Shoelace ploughed all of their energy into winning the cup, taking 76 points worth of hits across three gameweeks in order to outscore their opponents. Curiously, they also climbed the table, proving that taking hits doesn’t necessarily always cost you points. As long as you bring in the right players. It’s not a tactic I’d suggest playing across an entire season.

Rico United were double month winners and Yeboah’s Right Foot won manager of the week more than anyone else, coming out on top four times. That’s probably pretty impressive in a 53 team league. The record still stands at seven in a 26 team league.

Alexis Sanchez topped the player charts by some distance, although had Harry Kane played out a full season, it’s probable he’d have collected more points. He finished joint third with Eden Hazard, and just behind Dele Alli, but missed eight games with injury. Tom Heaton was the top goalkeeper. He kept ten clean sheets, and headed both the saves made and bonus points tables to finish ahead of Hugo Lloris and Thibault Courtois. The Chelsea defence ruled. No-one got close to Cahill, Alonso and Azpilicueta. Kane, Hazard, Kevin De Bruyne and Romelu Lukaku topped the bonus charts, all scoring 33. Marcos Alonso’s value rose the most over the course of the season, £0.9 million to £6.9 million.

Picking a bargain buy of the season hasn’t been as easy as last year when we had so many Leicester players to choose from. West Brom’s second top scorer, Gareth McAuley, deserves a mention. The 804 year old defender started as a £4.5 million back up in many teams but probably lasted the distance thanks to his steady return of goals and clean sheets – up until the point that West Brom reached 40 points and they got the holiday brochures out. Josh King’s second half of the season was as prolific as any of the elite forward players in the league. Only Sanchez and Alli scored more from midfield. From gameweek 20 onwards he contributed in 13 of the 18 games he played in. Expect a position change and starting price rise for next season.

See you then.

Gameweek 38 results

May 23, 2017

up The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
85 2315
down When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
80 2312
same Aquamar 15
Noel Driver
77 2274
up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
110 2255
down Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
87 2238
up FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
91 2221
up Hedgehog Corpse FC
Nick Smith
91 2215
down RICO UNITED
JASON REACHER
70 2208
same Uriah Rennie 2nd XI
Neil Greenwood
97 2175
10  same To Elland Back
Alan Hardy
84 2161
11  same Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
97 2157
12  same Atlético Chappers
Richard Chapman
75 2134
13  same INIT FC
Mustafa khan
76 2123
14  same Your Ad Here
Matthew Hopkins
80 2114
15  up nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
90 2107
16  down Rip Roaring Reds
Sean Whyton
80 2100
17  up Hucking Fell
P Hawkins
94 2093
18  down Biscuitmen
Chris Morton
77 2090
19  down Go Buffoons Go
Jitesh Lakhani
66 2076
20  up QUEEN OF THE NORTH
DORINE REACHER
76 2066
21  down Jeff Lamp’s Porsche
David Spinks
61 2063
22  up Yeboah’s Right Foot
Paul Murray
78 2051
23  down Cooksters
Peter Cook
66 2044
24  down Joey Bosa
Paul Bentz
51 2027
25  up 4 Fuchs Ake
Jason Earwicker
62 2024
26  up Jarvis FC
Matt Jarvis
100 2021
27  same Upper Bullens
Andy Taylor
76 2017
28  down greenyteamy
adam greenwood
49 2016
29  down Shoelace Untied
Caroline Strong
80 2008
30  up jetty city
scott mcgow
73 1979
31  down Have a little dink
Ian Williams
73 1977
32  same romeoshondavan
Rob Hewer
74 1968
33  same RG XV
Ryan Garoghan
77 1960
34  same Golden Boys
Stephanie Cripps
89 1958
35  up FTM
Stu Smith
92 1930
36  down 30:19
Darren Lavelle
66 1907
37  up Pudding And Pie
John Seacroft
68 1871
38  up I am not Zlatan
Colin Goulding
67 1869
39  up Ciderheads
Darren Pope
68 1868
40  down Release The Hounds
Paul Mitchell
44 1866
41  same Dj daz
darren frankland
74 1857
42  same Crazy Legs XI
David Caldicott
65 1843
43  same Bakerlona
Stuart Baker
68 1822
44  up Pepe Le Blue
DEAN CRIPPS
79 1821
45  down Real Jorvik
Simon Brown
57 1810
46  same Big White Chiefs
david frankland
43 1742
47  same Pretty Schitty City
Alex Michaluk
40 1714
48  same Bermie Utd
Glen Davies
56 1705
49  up Jarv88
Paul Jarvis
71 1656
50  down Bish Bosh Goal
Simon Purnell
54 1655
51  down bazza 28 united
laura barrett
49 1645
52  same DJ’s Trail Blazers
Danian Jones
55 1638
53  same Racing Club Skegness
Andrew Swift
59 1635

A typically crazy last week in which the Buckets league clocked up another couple of century scores. I’m pretty sure this season has seen more 100+ totals by our managers than any other. I suppose it helps there being 53 of us.

And all you had to do was concentrate on the top five. They scored 23 goals between them. The fixtures had fallen very kindly. As expected, Manchester City walloped Watford, Chelsea thumped Sunderland, Spurs annihilated Hull and Liverpool comfortably despatched of Boro. Even Arsenal, arguably with the trickiest tie, managed to hit three past Everton with ten men.

The four goals Harry Kane hit against Leicester on Thursday convinced many of us to go with him as captain. A simple choice – totally justified. His 17 points made him player of the week for the second week running and for the third time in total. Any combination of this supporting cast of usual suspects – Aguero, Hazard, Coutinho, Sanchez, Alli, De Bruyne, Pedro, Lallana, Jesus, Eriksen (the list goes on) – pretty much guaranteed you your 80+ score.

Kebab Eaters won the week, and fittingly, their 110 points was enough to see them jump into fourth place in the final table and claim the last cash prize. They pipped Edgbaston, who finished 5th for a second consecutive year. They should take some consolation in the fact they clinched the May manager of the month prize. Their record breaking total from last week virtually guaranteed the award, and despite the 87 points they achieved this week not being enough to hang onto fourth, it was more than enough to earn them a place on the role of honour. Here’s the May table…

same Edgbaston
Micheal Dinneen
87 355
same FC Caligula
Ajay Supeda
91 336
up Kebab Eaters Utd
Paul Howard
110 331
down When Harry met Alli
Trevor Gordon
80 329
same nO fucHs given
Paul Callaghan
90 329
down The Craggy Islanders
Adrian Roche
85 325
down Neil Madrid
Neil Strong
97 324

Player of the week – Harry Kane – 17 points. Pretty much guarantees his most valuable player status for next season.

Bargain of the week – Geoff Cameron – 12 points. Er!

Donkey of the week – Laurent Koscielny – -2 points. What was he thinking?

Goal of the week – Aaron Ramsey. Probably the first thing he’s done all season.

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